Lyrics To My Heart
by MadameOvaries
Summary: Secrets kill in Fells Church. Bonnie returns to town after a mysterious absence, Caroline has new neighbors, and someone isn't who they say they are. After Katherine goes missing everything heats up, and this time Fells Church is going to burn... *Lemons*
1. Come Back When You Can

**Prologue**

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People always told me, growing up, that love was effortless. That it would come to you if you gave it the chance and wasn't looking for it. My grandma told me she knew a man once- she swore she loved him and he asked for her hand in marriage. She felt like she was living on cloud nine, and said yes. Two years later they were married and had a kid; my mom. Then a man came along, he was sweet to her and she hadn't felt like he made her feel _… ever_. And she knew then that what her and my grandpa had wasn't love, it was just fondness. She knew that she should have waited for true love to come along before jumping into something.

I didn't buy it, and I swore I wouldn't let some ancient story stop me from finding true love. Sought out or fought out, I would find my prince charming and we would live happily ever after.

Ever since I was a little girl I would dream about finding the One. Me and my three best friends, Meredith, Caroline and Elena, would sit in my room and cut out features from magazines that we wanted our perfect guy to look like. We vowed we would never settle, never compromise ourselves. We were pretty cocky.

I guess you could say I was beautiful; I had curly red hair, shiny brown eyes and ivory skin. Everyone thought my face would get me a good marriage- but it was so much more than that. It wasn't about a good, wealthy marriage for me. It was about that instant connection, the heart-quickening-way he'd look into my eyes, the way I'd just _know._

No one told me it was going to be hard, no one thought to.

* * *

_**Lemons! ;)**_

**Chapter Title:**

**Come Back When You Can by Barcelona  
**


	2. Coming Home

**N/A Hey guys! I hope you take the time to read my fanfiction :) I think it's one of my best! And I know it's too soon to judge, but I do love me some reviews! So I ask of you to please take some time to review and tell me what y'all thin! Hugs and Kisses - Simmy**

**Chapter 1**

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Hugging my jacket around myself tightly, I stepped off the airplane in Fells Church, Virginia. It was raining, which was what I was afraid of. I was expecting it, but I still seen it as an omen. The rain and I were not compatible. It was slippery, wet and usually cold. It pained me to come back to Virginia after my long stay in California with my aunt Mimi, but I needed to come back. You couldn't hide forever.

What I also expected was my mother and father waiting to greet me at the end of the terminal- but I'm still surprised when I see them. I suppose the reason is because I was half-expecting my antagonistic, disagreeable step-sister to be standing there as well- looking stout-mouthed and uncomfortable. But it was just my parent's standing there. My mother's cheeks were flushed and her round, brown eyes, exactly like mine, were bright with tears. My father was standing beside her, looking relieved and awkward; he didn't like to show emotion.

He greeted me gruffly. "Bonnie McCullough, hasn't been the same around here." He gave me an awkward one-armed hug and then let my mom drag me away.

"Honey, I've missed you so much!" She wrapped her arms around me and gave me a tight hug. I missed the smell of her hair; like lavender and honey-suckle. I missed her warmth and the motherly aura she gave off. I hadn't realized how much I'd missed her.

"I miss you, too," I replied. Then looked around the airport terminal; maybe I had somehow missed my sister.

My mother noticed my sweeping gaze. She patted my cheek, and then smoothed a lock of hair out of my face. "Katherine wanted to be here, but she has SAT prep."

I nodded, trying not to look upset. My adopted sister, Katherine, and I hadn't been on strong terms when I left. I think she was still upset that I got the guy for once, when she always did. I stopped thinking about it; it was the present and the past was history. I swallowed; I could afford to be impartial now. "It's fine. I know how hard she has to work to get into Berkeley."

My mother smiled softly. "Come on, sweet heart. Howard, get her bags."

It had been almost a year since I left Virginia, but everything still looked the same. I shouldn't have expected things to feel different, but I still felt trapped by the green and the overcast and the crowded buildings. By what didn't happen between me and my … boyfriend, Matt Honeycutt. I didn't know if that was the right word to use anymore; we had only talked a few times since I left. It was my fault, mostly; I still felt weird about it. Was that even possible? I should have gotten over it; normal people get over that kind of thing. It shouldn't have even been that bad …

Also, I still felt that strange apprehension that something was going to go horribly awry in my wake. It was a silly precognition but it still made me wonder. Maybe I should wait to go home; being around my sister right now didn't seem like such a good idea. I still didn't know how she felt and we hadn't seen each other in a while, maybe it was best to let my parents warm her up before gracing her with my presence.

I wasn't ready to be home. I thought being around my parents after so long would be a comfort. I thought the shock and depression over what had happened would eventually fade but it didn't.

Sometime during my thinking we had found our way out of the airport and into my parents' silver Lexus. My father had already put my bags in the trunk and we were speeding through Fells Church, toward our home.

It worried me how exact everything looked, like the town was never changing. I know I wasn't gone _that _long but wasn't there a rule that things had to at least change a bit?

My parents were the same, too; my father drove and pretended to be mildly interested in what my mother was saying as she touched up her make up in her compact mirror. "Bonnie, you've gotten so thin. Was Mimi feeding you right?"

"Mom, Aunt Mimi was great. It was probably from the heat or something…" I trailed off: now would be a good time to make my escape. "Would you be able to drop me off at Meredith's or Caroline's on the way home? I've really missed my friends."

Meredith Sulez and Caroline Forbes had been my best friends since the seventh grade. Caroline was the bubbly one who knew how to have a good time and outshone everyone around her, but at the same time she was demanding and pushy and always wanted to take charge. Meredith was always the more mature, smart and practical one of the group, I couldn't help but always think she should have been the leader, not me.

I wasn't cut out for leadership; it just happened. People expected me to step up to the plate, especially when Elena Gilbert, Robert E. Lee High School's former Queen, moved away with Aunt Judith and Margaret because Robert had wanted to be closer to his parents after he and Judith married. And there was me. Suddenly everyone was turning to me for answers, where to go and who to be friends with, who to like. It all got very Blair Waldorf via Gossip Girl and I couldn't handle that. I didn't keep my cool all the time and I wasn't mean; I _couldn't _intentionally hurt someone. I couldn't live up to everyone expectations and fill Elena's shoes. This is part of the reason I left.

"I think you should come home," my mother said, calling my attention back.

I sighed, about to shoot off into why I wanted to go see Meredith and Caroline, but then my dad spoke up. "Oh, let her, Susan. We still have things to do at home."

He and my mother exchanged a sly glance.

My mom looked back at me, "So, should we drop you at Caroline's?"

I grimaced; my mother had this unexplained problem with Meredith's family. "Yes," I answered, not meeting my mother's gaze.

A few moments later we pulled up to Caroline's light blue house with delicate white shudders, freshly cut grass and a white picket fence. The house was so 50's show home it made me smile; elegant and cheery.

I stepped out of the car and grabbed my bag. Knowing I should, I stepped towards my mother's window and waved goodbye politely. I waited on the curb till my parent's car drove away.

How I wished my mother and I could just sit down again and have that good old one-on-one mother-daughter talks we used to before Katherine came home with dad one night and squeezed her way into our already happy family. Don't get me wrong- I welcomed Katherine into home with warmth. Not everyone would after their father randomly came home with a pale girl he found on the side of the road, I managed to- even though it was odd.

I just wished she hadn't destroyed things so much between me and my mom. Before I could come to her with everything; from a scratch on my knee to boy problems- now I could barely look her in the eye.

"Hey," someone called, pulling me from my reverie.

I turned warily to see a guy walking down the street towards me. Maybe I had met him before I left and had forgotten. But as he got closer I seen his face and I knew I would never forget someone who looked like that. He looked like a Greek god- then again I was probably a little biased; I had a thing for John Varvatos and this guy was wearing one of the leather jacket's from his Spring/Summer collection. "Hello," I said, sticking my hand out to greet him. "I'm Bonnie McCullough."

He took my hand and smiled at me; I noticed he had perfect teeth. "I'm Stefan Salvatore- do you live here?" Stefan's leaf green eyes appraised Caroline's house, giving me some time to study him. God, he was beautiful. I just might jump on him.

I shook my head, clearing it subtly. "I'm visiting a friend." It took a while for me to notice I was just standing there, looking at him. "I should-go."

He nodded but stopped me. "I was actually looking for my dog. It's an American Foxhound."

I bit my lip; I didn't know what kind of dog he was talking about, but I knew they were really common in Virginia. "Uhm, yeah, I'll totally look out for it."

He chuckled and looked at me oddly with shiny emerald eyes. "It's white with brown spots. It's my dad's and very expensive so he would probably have an aneurysm if he found out I lost it."

I giggled stupidly; _god, what am I doing? _Then scratched my forehead and cleared my throat. "Oh-okay, see you around."

Stefan had already vanished from my mind as I skipped up the long white staircase of the Caroline Forbes's house.

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**Chapter Title:**

**Coming Home by P. Diddy featuring Dirty Money**


	3. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

**Chapter 2**

* * *

It wasn't until I was about to knock on the door that I thought how rude my unexpected arrival was, then was shocked to feel this way. Before I left I always showed up unannounced at Caroline's and Meredith's house, it was just the way we worked. When we needed each other then we were there for each other, but I didn't know if the same rules still applied.

I decided to just take the plunge; if anything Caroline should be happy to see me. I knocked lightly on the door then took a step back.

Just as I thought, her mom answered the door. She did a double take when she seen me standing there. "Bonnie, my dear, what are you doing here?" She pulled me into a hug then let me go, holding me back to look at. "It's impossible but I think you've gotten thinner- and even more beautiful!" She patted my cheek.

I blushed. "I'm here to see Caroline, Mrs Forbes. Is she in?"

"Oh, of course." She smiled, the delicate skin clinging to her cheekbones rising. "I'll tell her Bonnie's waiting. She'll be so pleased!"

I waited while she went to give Caroline the message. She closed the door behind her, so I was left standing there like an idiot. I was struck for a second; why didn't she invite me in? She had been acting normal enough; this wasn't normal. I worried for a second that I might be treated like more of an outsider than I liked.

Impatiently, I kicked the toe of my sneaker against the concrete. I wasn't used to waiting on people and this was getting uncomfortable. Really, how long did it take to give someone a message? Then I heard a door open above me.

I looked up, confused, and then remembered that there was a bay window above the front door that opened off Caroline's room. I stepped back some more.

"Bonnie," Caroline cried, her head sticking out of the window, looking down at me. She still looked the same; shiny auburn hair and green cat-like eyes. "Come on up!" She ducked inside again before I could respond.

I opened up the front door and hesitantly walked in. I looked around, everything was still the same. The only difference was that now there were pictures lining walls in the foyer. I stepped closer and studied them, they were hideous. I was never one for abstract, but then again I was never really one for art, period.

Turning away from the hideous mess of color I noticed something else was different; in the foyer there used to be a table with pictures from Caroline's childhood- including pictures of us four; me, Caroline, Meredith and Elena. Now the table was empty, only a bouquet of roses sat in the middle. I swallowed and climbed the stairs, two at a time like I used to.

When I got to the top I turned to the left instinctively and walked down the hall to Caroline's bedroom door. I was feeling oddly nostalgic about being in this house again, almost like I had never left. I wondered if things had changed as much as I did.

This is silly, I thought to myself. They're still my best friends. Just go in there! They've missed you.

I took a deep breath and gripped the handle, feeling the cold metal beneath my sweaty palm, and then I turned it quickly and threw it open, probably with a little too much force.

When I came in, their attention was on two big piles of clothes on either side of Caroline and the dress she was now holding up to her curvy bodice, which was one of the things I was surprised to see; Caroline hadn't grown into her body yet when I left and now she was sporting a sexy hour glass figure. The other thing was Meredith's hair, where before it was shoulder-length in adorable dark ringlets, now it was long and waving down the middle of her back elegantly.

"Oh my god!" Caroline suddenly said, dropping the dress she was holding and running towards me. "Bonnie," She pulled me into a tight hug.

I hugged her back, "I've missed you, too."

Behind her, Meredith jumped up from her perch on Caroline's purple down-filled duvet and skipped towards us. She wrapped her arms around us and squeezed. I groaned and enjoyed this feeling of camaraderie. "I missed both of you," I breathed. "What's going on here?" I asked, taking a mouth full of Caroline's auburn hair.

Caroline pulled away. "Oh, we're just going through In and Out of my wardrobe."

Meredith gave me a look that suggested it wasn't her choice of activity. "We didn't know if you'd come back," Meredith admitted, pulling apart, but grabbing my hand and towing me towards her bed. She sat behind me and started braiding my hair. "You've been gone almost three months."

"You didn't think I would abandon you guys forever did you?" I teased.

"How was California anyways? Was it glamorous?" Caroline asked, flopping on her stomach onto her duvet. "Did you meet any celebrities?"

"I was in Fresno not Hollywood." I laughed, enjoying the feeling when the airs of bubbles peeled effortlessly up my throat; I hadn't laughed wholly in such a long time. It felt good.

Caroline giggled, staring at me oddly.

I was pondering her gaze when Meredith broke the short silence. "When did you get back?"

I cleared my throat. "I actually just came from the airport."

She finished braiding my hair and fell onto the bed beside me, so I could see her face. "I just can't believe your back. You are back aren't you?"

"Yes. My mom called the Principal at Robert E. Lee so I'm registered again." I shook my head; my mom's persuasion skills baffled me sometimes. "Anyways, I'm back for good."

Meredith smiled, "Well, I, for one, am very excited about this news."

Caroline nodded vigorously. "Now things can finally go back to normal."

Meredith gave her a look.

"Has a lot changed?" I asked. They both shook their heads; I didn't trust it. "Is there something wrong?" I asked.

Meredith smirked and Caroline burst out laughing. "Hardly!" She said.

"Actually it's something _very _good." Meredith added.

I slid my legs under me and sat up straight. "Okay, I need all the deets."

Caroline got up from the bed, grabbed her boar bristle brush and walked to her rounded bay window. "Well, a couple weeks ago we got new neighbors …" She started brushing her hair while looking devilishly out the window. "It just so happens it's one of the founding families coming back to their home town … And their son is very-"

"Attractive!" Meredith cut in, smiling.

Caroline snapped her fingers, "I'm telling the story! Anyways," she said when Meredith folded her hands primly on her lap in a gesture of shutting up. "His name is Stefan-" Caroline smiled secretly.

"Wait- Stefan? As in … Stefan Salvatore?" I asked, remembering the boy who had approached me in front of Caroline's house.

Meredith and Caroline exchanged a look. "You know him?" Meredith asked.

I shrugged. "Not really." I bit my lip, contemplating; should I tell them?

"He's our age," Caroline continued as if I hadn't interrupted. "And he goes to our school so there's plenty of opportunity for one of us to get to know him better. By one of us I mean you, obviously." She looked angry that this was the "obvious" outcome.

I, on the other hand, was appalled. "Me? Why?"

Meredith and Caroline exchanged another glance and Meredith got up to stand beside Caroline. She spoke, "We thought when you came back you'd want to get back to the way things were …"

I sighed, "I do!" I paused, trying to assemble my thoughts into one sentence. "I just think I left all of the scheming behind when I left Fells Church."

I had looked away, so I heard both of their mouths pop open in surprise. I couldn't tell if I offended them.

It was a while before someone spoke, finally Caroline broke the silence. "So you don't want to be Queen anymore?"

My head snapped towards her. "Why do you think that?"

She looked down quickly: I instantly felt horrible for sounding so sharp.

"I do, I just don't want to use scheming to find guys anymore! Ever since I became Queen I've used manipulation and foolish plans to get my way but I'm done with that." Elena had left Fells Church a month before me, leaving me with all her duties. I was still baffled it all fell onto me though; soft, little Bonnie. I took a deep breath and carried on with my speech. "I used scheming to get Matt and look how that turned out; in fatality. We made up a huge plan about how to get Meredith on Tyler Smallwood's arm when he first came into town and we didn't know what a skeeze he was. I used manipulation to get good grades, but then ended up having to cram before the PSAT's. The point is; it hasn't gotten me anywhere." I paused, looking at both of their faces. "I think it's time to turn over a new leaf."

Caroline stepped towards me; I noticed she was now at least three inches taller than me. "Things aren't going to change, Bonnie. We have followers, an empire that we need to guide."

Meredith stepped forward too, "She's right. Things have been this way forever. It can't change just because …" Her dark, exotic eyes studied mine then looked away. "Well, you know."

I crossed my arms. "Because I have?"

She didn't answer.

I swallowed. "It's true. I've changed because I realized if I keep manipulating guys into falling in love with me then I'm never going to find …" I trailed off, looking into both of their eyes, aware mine were filling with tears, "find love."

Caroline swept her hair over her shoulder and breezily walked towards the intercom beside her closet. "Ma, we need some margaritas up here- stat." She turned back to us.

I was sure both Meredith and I's expressions were the same.

She shrugged. "It seemed like we were getting into the heavy; and that requires alcohol."

I couldn't help myself; I burst out laughing. Meredith and Caroline eventually joined in.

About an hour later us three were sitting on Caroline's bed, finishing up out third margarita and talking. "I'm just saying; you wouldn't even have to scheme, he'd probably fall in love with you without having to try." Meredith said.

"Why would you think that?" I asked, taking another sip of my margarita. "The idea of someone falling in love with me is about as impossible as getting Caroline to stop spying!" I threw a pillow at Caroline who was sitting on her bay window, trying to get a glimpse of Stefan with a pair of her dad's binoculars.

"_Oof!_" She groaned when the pillow hit her. "I am _not spying!"_ She threw the pillow back, narrowly missing my drink. "I'm just curious …"

"I actually wouldn't mind a glimpse of Stefan." I said, deciding that not telling them would be better.

"Trust me, you'd fall as in love with him as me," Caroline promised, bringing the binocular's back up to her face.

"Will you stop?" Meredith said, getting up to tear the binocular's away from her. "If he somehow sees you then Bonnie will have zero chance with him because of her creepy best friend.'

"Relax, he's not even home yet," Caroline said, coming to sit beside me on her bed.

Meredith rolled her eyes and I giggled; I had missed this. Caroline had always been like this, and I loved it.

While Meredith and Caroline chatted about how cute Stefan was, I looked around Caroline's room.

It was exactly the same as when I left, but that was strangely comforting. But there was something different, I realized. My eyes landed on a little white table near the door of her room with pictures on it.

I glanced at the two girls; they were still engrossed in their conversation. I slipped off the bed and walked towards the pictures on the white table. As I got closer I realized what they were; the pictures that were supposed to be on the table in the foyer. Pictures from Caroline's childhood of the four of us.

My eyes filled with tears and my heart suddenly felt warm, though I didn't know why.

Meredith and Caroline were suddenly behind me. "I brought those up here after you and Elena left, you know, because I missed you guys." Caroline said softly, clearing her throat.

I spun around and threw my arms around her. "I'm sorry I left."

"Why did you?" Meredith asked quietly.

I swallowed, pulling away from Caroline and wiping my tears. "That's not important now." I still hadn't told them the complete story about Matt, all they knew was that he tried to pressure me into having sex and then I dumped him. They didn't know the worst part. My eyes landed on the clock beside Caroline's bed; 5:30 pm. "I have to go home," I said. "I'm sorry; my parents were expecting me for dinner." _And Katherine_, I silently added.

Meredith glanced at Caroline then back to me. "We'll come with you!"

I paused. "Really?"

Caroline nodded. "Of course. We missed you, and how are you supposed to get home?"

I smirked. "I was going to call a cab."

Caroline waved her hands at me. "Nonsense, Meredith and I will go with you."

So they did. On my way home in Caroline's car with the two of them I couldn't help but think that something was wrong. Why would I think that? So far everything was perfect! I should enjoy my first day back in Fells Church.

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** A/N As always, take a moment to leave a review please, at least so I can thank you for reading. I love talking to fans! :)**

**Chapter Title:**

**Girls Just Want to Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper  
**


	4. Here We Go Again

**A/N Thanks for the great reviews! I always appreciate them and I love talking to fans :) So I please ask you to take another moment to review. Enjoy! Hugs and Kissed - Simmy**

**Chapter 3**

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The car was quiet as we drove through town, the green trees blurred. My parents had relocated over the last few months and I found it hard to navigate the thick forest For once, I was grateful for Caroline's insane driving so I can rag on her; I didn't want to think about seeing Katherine at home. "Can you slow down a bit? I'd like to be alive long enough to graduate."

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not driving fast at all."

"The meters nearing 130, Caroline; that's fast enough in my book."

Meredith chuckled from the backseat. "God, Bonnie, would you calm down? You just got back and you're already nagging Caroline about her driving."

I smiled and dropped my head into my hands. "I'm sorry!" I didn't know how to explain this to them; they were my very best friends but only knew so much about my relationship with Katherine. They didn't know about what happened between Matt- or what _didn't _happen. They knew little about why Katherine hated me so much- and I certainly didn't want to explain my overwhelming urge to grab hold of the wheel and turn us back toward town so we could go back to Caroline's and have a few more margarita's. But I had to face my issues, I knew that. I just didn't know if I wanted my friends there with me to witness what might unfold.

"Relax," Meredith's calm voice said. "Besides, we're here."

"We're here already?" I looked around, trying to see past the trees; I had forgotten how thick the brush got in the Old Wood around my house. It was barely visibly until you turned the bend onto the driveway. And even then the trees around the house almost touched the faded brown paint. "How can you tell?" I asked.

I wondered if Meredith had heard me, because she just stared blankly out the window.

Caroline waved her hand in the air in a 'Oh, you know!' sort of way. "Meredith and I came here all the time during your absence to visit Katherine," her voice was care-free and matter-of-fact.

My head snapped towards her. "Why?" My eyes flickered to Meredith.

Meredith shrugged. "It's not important anymore." Then Caroline turned off the highway onto the gravel road towards my house.

Then I saw it; surrounded by vibrant green trees was my faded brown house with a wraparound porch and white shudders. The white paint on the fence was newly painted and the grass looked freshly cut.

As soon as Caroline parked I grabbed my bag and hopped out. Meredith was instantly at my side, "Do you think they planned anything?"

I shuddered. "I hope not." Meredith gave me a knowing look; everyone knew how I hated surprises. I like to be kept in-the-know about everything and personally didn't see the appeal in not knowing what the future held. Though I had no idea anymore …

I walked forward, with Caroline and Meredith flanking me. My mind was half focused on putting one foot in front of the other and the other part of my brain was wondering why my best friends would be hanging out with Katherine leisurely during my absence.

Stopping sharply, I looked at the white door before me. I knew I couldn't put this off any longer, but I was still reluctant. Seeing my sister again was terrifying- judging and mean as she was. I was sure she was just another thing in this town that hadn't changed. I just _really _didn't want to find out, at least not yet. I had hid for almost a year, though; it was time to face my demons. And this particular demon was called Katherine.

Meredith nudged me, "Uhm, Bonnie? Are you alright?"

I nodded quickly then knocked on the door once.

Caroline snickered. "Bonnie, this is your house. Just ... walk in."

Taking a deep breath, I put my hand on the doorknob and turned. "Ahh!" I shrieked when I see my mother standing directly behind the door. Then I put a hand on my chest when I see it was her, my heart was beating erratically.

Her brown eyes were wide. "Don't mind me …" She said, fixing her tight bun and turning back towards the dining room. "Oh!" She said, turning back around. "Nice to see you, Caroline and … Meredith." Her brown eyes stayed on Meredith a second longer than necessary. I internally cursed my mother for being so rude. "So good to see you girls. Caroline, how is your mother these days? I've barely seen her."

Caroline smiled brightly, showing her dimples; her parents-smile. "She's been doing fine, Mrs McCullough. She'll be please you asked."

My mother smiled back. "That's good, tell her I send my best." Her eyes landed on me, and she had a mischievous twinkle in them. "Bonnie, you have guests in the dining room."

I swallowed loudly; I was afraid of this. "Guests?" I drawled a bit on the plural.

My mother smiled softly. "Oh, yes." She said nothing more, walking away.

I glanced at my friends; they both smiled encouragingly, and then started forward. I tried to see past everything in the house; it was only a reminder of how my leaving was irrelevant; time didn't move here. Everything looked the same.

Finally I entered the dining room. I was surprised to see there were only four people at the table; my father, Katherine, Matt, and Frances Decatur.

I wondered why anybody thought to invite Frances; we weren't really friends, just hung out with the same crowd. Well, she tagged along. Her plain face looked slightly flushed at the sight of me entering the room, her eyes flashed over our threesome quickly- making me feel uncomfortable.

Of course, I was also surprised-and even more uncomfortable-to see Matt sitting beside Katherine. Matt was my … boyfriend. To be honest, I hadn't thought much about him. Seeing him here now, sitting beside the girl who had tried to steal him, I couldn't believe how much I had put myself through all for a game. When the prize was so imperceptible, what was the point?

My father was at the head of the table so I sat at the other end, near Frances, who beamed at the arrangement. Caroline and Meredith sat on my left, dutifully. Soon my mother joined us, carrying a roast beef with vegetables.

"Caroline, you blouse looks absolutely darling on you. That blue really suits your skin tone." It was Katherine who spoke first. Out of the months we had spent away her voice was still satin smooth, alluring, but still every bit menacing.

I could feel Katherine's gaze on me, or glare for all I knew, but I didn't have the courage to look up and meet it.

I see Caroline's face light up. "Oh my gosh, thank you, Katherine!" She nudged Meredith. "Told you it wasn't bad."

"And, Meredith, did you do something with your hair today? It looks so elegant and shiny." Katherine said.

Meredith blushed- something she didn't usually do. "No, I just let it fall today."

Katherine smiled nicely- something I didn't trust. "Well, I'm absolutely jealous. If I just let my hair hang everyday I'd never leave the house!"

Meredith and Caroline laughed- both positively beaming. Since when did Katherine suck up to my friends?

I suddenly felt like everyone in the room was looking at me, waiting for me to snap or do something obscene that would prove aunt Mimi did a horrible job of keeping me or that I really was a nut-job, from what they must think, for even wanting to leave Virginia in the first place.

"So how was Aunt Mimi? I've missed her." Katherine said, using her 'sweet voice'.

"She was great," I looked up to quickly meet Katherine's gaze then looked away to meet my father's gentler eyes. "I think she was talking about coming up here during Winter break- you know how Uncle Henry got laid off during hockey season and she wouldn't want him sitting on his-well, you know. And I'm sure mom's missed Aunt …" I pressed my lips together; I was starting to ramble and rambling wasn't good. Something might accidentally slip out and the last thing I needed was a scene.

"Yes," my mother agreed. "I have missed that hair-brained Mimi." She blushed then looked into her wine glass as she took a sip.

"I wonder if she'd mind us sending her a thank-you basket for taking such care of BonBon for us when she went away." My father added. I sighed; my father was the only one who still called me BonBon. I had put a stop to that nickname in my first fresh years of adolescence.

"Certainly not," I rushed, and then blinked. "I mean, you know how easy-going she is."

"Of course," Katherine agreed, giving me an odd look. She lifted her wine glass and brought it to her bow shaped lips- but before she took a sip she suddenly set her glass down. "But we all know no one can top my dear, dear sister, Bonnie."

I felt the floor beneath me turn hot, and suddenly every part of me was burning; an instant reaction when Katherine used this voice. This voice had been haunting my dreams for the past six months; this voice could send shivers down Satan's spine and make God's angels cry; this voice was what I was afraid of after three months of running from my problems. And, of course, Katherine knew all of this.

Katherine raised her glass in the air, filled with red wine and looked straight at me. "Bonnie's so easy-going she'll hitch the first ride to Fresno just to get away from her responsibilities- but we all know mommy and daddy would rather _die_ than make her pay the consequences. But, hey, I don't blame you. If I knew what you knew then I might have done the same thing- maybe I would have thought about it first. But that's the difference between you and me." She took a long swig of her wine then set the glass down, giving my parents hard looks that said '_you shouldn't have made me come_' then giving me an icy, cold scowl.

"Cheers to you, sis. You've got everyone right where you want them." Then she left the room, her heels clacking down the hall and out the front door.

As she left, all eyes were on Katherine. Now, their eyes turned to me; each filled with questions.

My mind was running in over-time, but asking a million questions that couldn't be answered. Katherine knew about what happened between me and Matt? If she didn't than what was she talking about? How was I going to explain this to everyone? Why did Katherine have to cause a scene? These questions circulated in my mind, waiting for answers I didn't know. And there was so much more … I couldn't sit here and let Katherine leave without giving _her _a piece of _my _mind. She must be expecting me to take it, just sit back and let her be the older one who gave all the big talks- but I've changed and I wasn't about to let Katherine stomp all over me and embarrass be in front of everyone.

I pushed back from the table, muttering an 'excuse me' and then following Katherine out into the front yard. She was walking towards her BMW quickly, not looking back.

"Katherine!" I shouted after her. Her back stiffened but she otherwise kept walking. "Hey, I'm talking to you!" I ran after her, pulling her arm to turn her around when I caught up with her. The expression on her face-the untamed anger-did nothing for me as she turned to face me. I was too mad and hurt as well. "How can you say that stuff to me? Especially in front of mom and dad! I mean c'mon, just when I just get back, Katherine? Have you no modesty, no maiden shame, no touch of bashfulness?"

She scowled, and I glared hatefully at her beauty. Katherine was one of those girls who anger only made prettier. She looked like an angel, minus the scowl- like my ex-best friend Elena Gilbert. With her flowing gold locks and dark lapis lazuli eyes she had ruled Robert E. Lee and hearts of the boys who went there. Katherine, eerily, look exactly like her.

"Quoting Shakespeare doesn't make you seem more mature, Bonnie. You're still a baby who doesn't know how to handle boys." Except Elena would never have said something so ignorant.

"I'm not trying to seem more mature, Katherine! God, would you listen to yourself." I stepped away from her. "Your acting like I never left."

"More like I wish you never came back," she whispered her icy voice as harsh as a whip in the quiet night. The sun had gone down, but the moon hadn't come up. It was twilight, but it didn't feel like a new beginning. It felt like the end of something huge.

I swallowed, clenching my jaw. "You would have liked that, wouldn't you of?"

She smirked. "More than _you _would have."

My nasty comeback got stuck in my throat. "What does _that _mean?"

Katherine scoffed. "I know what happened with you and Matt."

"How can you know about that?" I whispered, then swallowed hard. "No, you're lying. Matt and I are the only ones who know what happened that night and he would never tell." There was no way she knew; Matt had also been traumatized by everything that happened and he wouldn't want to talk about it either.

Katherine smirked, ignoring me. "Poor baby, couldn't handle her first time crashing as hard as a train wreck-" Relief was so painful it hurt; so she didn't know the whole story. Good. "-but that is what you are, isn't it? A train wreck. Not even you can save yourself. You can't run anymore." Katherine stepped forward so she was standing right in front of me.

I felt my palms tingle and suddenly felt the urge to slap her- I surprised myself; I wasn't usually violent. "My love life is none of your business, Katherine."

She laughed slightly. "Oh, but it is, isn't it? Because when you fully crash I'll be there to watch all the damage it does- and I'll be there to make sure Matt got through with no scratches." She smiled wickedly.

I giggled; she must have honestly thought threatening me with stealing Matt would affect me. "Katherine, I know this must all seem foreign to you, but people get over things. I got over Matt a while ago … I'm not sure how long ago. I would have thought you would have as well. And that doesn't make you mature, either." I managed to look down on her even though she was at least an inch and a half taller than me. "It makes you pathetic."

Katherine's nostrils flared

I turned away from my sister, feeling oddly accomplished. When I got to the porch I turned back and shouted out to her, still standing on the lawn. "I don't care what you do in your spare time, or who you do it with, just don't involve me anymore. I'm done."

Inside, the dinner party had turned back to calm, but I knew they were all still wondering. Maybe, I decided, I'll tell Meredith and Caroline what happened later, but there's no way in hell I'm telling Matt or Frances or my parents.

We ate civilly throughout the dinner and eventually Matt drove Frances home and Meredith, Caroline and I retired up to my room after helping my mom with the dishes. Katherine still hadn't come inside by that time either. She could have driven to a friend's house, gone for supper somewhere else, or driven off a bridge for all I care.

Of course, when we got to my room Caroline wanted all of the details of what Katherine meant at supper and every single sentence of Katherine and I's fight. I didn't give them all the details but enough to satisfy them. Eventually, we were all lying on my bed and talking peacefully.

"I can't believe what a bitch Katherine was …" Caroline mumbled.

"I can't believe you hung out with her all summer- I'm still waiting for an explanation, by the way." I said.

Meredith responded. "You can't really blame us; she's your sister and we missed you. Of course we needed a reason for being around the house …"

I shook my head, "Not good enough, there has to be another reason."

"Well, there isn't," Meredith insisted. "We just … wanted a reason."

Obviously there was something they were hiding from me, but I was sure I wasn't going to get it out of them tonight. What I needed to worry about this instant was my love life, if I even had one. First things first, I needed to officially end it with Matt; he should feel like I have no hold on him. Secondly, I needed to prove myself to Katherine, though she didn't deserve it. I deserved it to myself. Her words echoed in my head '_You're still a baby who doesn't know how to handle boys'_. Well, I could prove her wrong. I smiled and sat up. "Anyways, I suppose none of it matters anymore. What matters is what we're going to do about Stefan."

Caroline and then jumped up beside me. Meredith sat up too, and grabbed my hand, smiling.

"Don't worry, he'll love you instantly," Meredith said.

"Yes, and if you have any doubts we're here!" Caroline put in.

I nodded. "Meredith, I'm going to need all the statistics on this guy and his schedule. Caroline, try and come up with a good rumor about me that'll get his attention." I stood up from the bed and put my hands on my slender hips, looking thoughtfully out the window at the pale moon above the trees. I was sure if I didn't work as hard as the others and still remained myself it wasn't scheming, just a little meddling.

I turned to the girls and smirked devilishly. "Stefan isn't going to know what hit him."

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Here We Go Again by Matt Kearney**


	5. Material Girl

**Chapter 4**

* * *

Aunt Mimi was easy to live with, she didn't nag on me to clean my room and she didn't bother to get into any of my business. That's one of the things I missed about my long stay in Cali. The second thing was no school. I hated the whole idea of the institution and was pretty sure that I didn't need it since my average was 94.5 without even trying.

Yet, here I was; a Thursday morning waking up at six a.m. by my mother. Normal teenagers are used to this; I don't take it so lightly.

"Mother, why do I have to wake up this early?" I asked, throwing my covers back and grabbing my pearl white silk robe.

My mother threw my curtains back and straightened them out before turning to me and rubbing my shoulders tenderly. "I know how hard the transition between living carefree in California with Aunt Mimi and coming back home to take back all of your responsibilities but it has to be done. You don't see Katherine sitting at home all day or gallivanting around the State. Instead she's involved in extracurricular activities and-"

"If you wanted me out of bed all you had to do was mention Katherine." I say, pulling my hair back in a messy ponytail as I grab my things before jumping in the shower.

My mother seemed hesitant, apprehensive. "About Katherine …"

I froze, silently cursing myself for speaking so antagonistically about my sister; I really didn't want to deceive my mother by saying everything was fine between Katherine and I when something could happen again tonight at the dinner table- or even this morning. "Yes, mom?"

My mother pursed her lips, I settled in for a wait. I knew this look well; she was finding the right words, the proper way to phrase her question. I pretend to be busy with my abnormally neat closet while she ponders.

Finally, she lets out a breath and her eyes met mine. "You probably have loads to do before going to school; we'll talk later." And with that she left the room, brushing my arm on her way out.

After my shower I took a full hour and a half picking out my outfit- my closet was dangerously under stocked. I had to plan a shopping spree with Meredith and Caroline. Finally, I decided on a dark blue pair of J Brand jeans, a Free People floral print dress that flowed perfectly over my jeans and looked sexy and casual and over that a light grey Smythe 'Sharp Shoulder' wool blazer to make me seem more professional, it perfectly contrasted to the flowing of the shirt. All in all, my outfit gave off an innocent and likeable vibe- definitely something to expect from the Queen of Robert E. Lee High School. But the thing I stressed most about, as always, was the shoes.

I believed that shoes were like a portal to the person's mind, if the shoes were bangin' and practical to the outfit then you couldn't go wrong. This philosophy is the reason I had shelves and shelves of shoes at the back of my walk-in closet. I didn't bother to hesitate; I went straight to my booties on the left side and studied them. A rosette cuff? I shook my head; nope, that would put the girliness up too far. Then my eyes feasted upon my favorite bootie out of the whole collection. A blue Francesco Morichetti button bootie that I hadn't got the chance to wear before I left for Miami.

I hungrily grabbed the bootie off the shelf and dropped to the floor, sticking my petite feet in them and then standing. They fit perfectly, and looked good. And they were also tall heels, which was good since I was a complete midget.

I sighed contently then grabbed my dark coral Marc by Marc Jacobs hobo bag, inside was lip balm, my wallet (with a few twenties and my debit card in it, along with my student I), my Blackberry and a few pens.

After all of this I fluffed up my curly red hair quickly, knowing I now only had about a half hour to get to school and meet up with Meredith and Caroline.

Just as I thought this my blackberry beeped from my bag. I pulled it out quickly and seen I had an incoming call from Meredith. I pressed talk and brought the phone to me ear.

"Hey," I said breathlessly, leaning toward my vanity mirror to put on a few coats of mascara on my already full dark lashes.

"We have a problem." Meredith said, using her serious voice.

I was just opening my mascara when she said this. I stopped half way. "What?"

When she spoke her voice was hushed. "Caroline isn't here yet, but I have a feeling I know where she is."

Her words confused me. "What about Caroline?"

She sighed in frustration. "Bonnie, keep up. Listen, I just found out some interesting news."

"I'm listening," I said as I finished applying my mascara and put a little light pink Laura Mercier lip balm.

"It turns out Stefan has a brother, named Damon. And this morning Caroline got a ride with him- but she still hasn't showed up."

I knew I should feel appalled at this news, but I thought it was great. "So? They probably stopped for a doughnut."

Meredith sighed. "We don't know anything about Damon; we did research on Stefan specifically, Bonnie. Damon could be dangerous. He is the older brother."

I pulled my burgandy DKNY peacoat on, balancing the Blackberry on my shoulder. "So that makes him an ex-con? I'm sure she's fine, Meredith. See you at school." I ended the call without another word and dropped it into my bag, grabbing the keys to my Ford Fiesta and heading to school.

Everyone in the parking lot stared as I slowly stepped out of my car and pulled my bag over my shoulder. I felt very aware of the stares on my back and my face flushed. Wishing I had some back-up I walked into the school, keeping my eyes on the pavement in front of me. As I walked toward my locker the stares became more apparent and finally I had to look up, only to meet the eyes of Stefan, the hot guy I had met outside of Caroline's. He was wearing the same John Varvatos jacket and his eyes were impossibly greener today.

I gave him an acknowledging smile and turned toward my locker. The combo was still the same, and everything inside was in the same place. I blew out a loud breath and ran my fingers through my red hair.

I grabbed my American History textbook and an empty notebook, taking off my peacoat and settling it on the hook. I paused, looking at the plainness of my locker, then my eyes landed on the only decoration; three pictures of me and my friends at the beach- smiling and laughing, wearing stupid sunglasses.

Suddenly, it all hit me. Wow, I thought. I'm really home. This is really it.

"Bonnie!" Caroline called from the end of the hallway. I looked up and seen her excitedly rushing up beside me, I glanced at the lockers to see if Stefan was still standing there- he wasn't.

"Hey, C," I greeted her, forcing a smile. "Meredith was worried about you this morning."

She sighed dramatically. "Because of Damon? Well she shouldn't be- because he's amazing!" She drawled out the 'amazing'.

"Is he?" I asked, feigning interest as I closed my locker and started down the hallway.

She fell into step beside me. "Yes! I was all ready to walk to school because my parents abandoned me and my car needed gas and then he was in front of my house in a Ferrari!" She gushed, her eyes shining. "Then he leaned over the window, smirked and said 'Need a ride?' I almost had a heart-attack- but played it cool." She smiled, like she was proud of herself.

"Wow, sounds like a pretty amazing guy." I was honestly happy for her, but I couldn't get past the stares I was getting. When I passed everyone stared, one girl even stopped mid-sentence and nudged her friend. It was like I had come back from the dead or something and they were completely shocked.

Frances Decatur was waiting at the bench in front of the office, our usual spot, with our group and iced coffee's for me and Caroline. Meredith was sitting on the bench alone, no one else dared to sit on the "Royal" bench. Me, Meredith, Caroline and Elena were called the Royals at Robert E. Lee. It wasn't a nickname we gave birth to or even liked- what we did like was the perks that came with it.

Frances handed them to us without a word, then stood and went to stand by two other ladies in waiting, as I liked to call them, Vicki Bennett and Sue Carson. Caroline sat down on the other side of the bench, leaving a space in the middle for me.

"Great outfit, Bonnie. It's totally fab," Sue said, sucking up and then retouching her cranberry colored lip gloss.

Sue was dressed in a tight floral tank top with a dark gray cardigan over it, with black no name boots on and super tight cigarette jeans. Her dry blond hair was curled and pulled back from her face with a red headband. I grimaced; I had forgotten that each of the ladies in waiting copied us. Sue was my copy-cat.

"Meredith, I super love your hair today. You waves are to die for," Vicki said, touching a lock of her own hair, which was dark brown. Even though she tried desperately to imitate Meredith's color she was not close; Meredith's were natural.

Meredith sipped her iced coffee and smiled politely at Vicki. She crossed her legs and I studied her outfit: a white Halogen tiered ruffle tank, Dunbar wash boyfriend jeans which were rolled up at the bottom to compliment her brownish green Michael Kors Oxford booties and a structured bark colored Frenchi cardigan to top it all off. Beside her on the bench was a Botkier studded leather satchel- I almost went green with envy; I was still on the waiting list for one.

Meredith caught my gaze and smirked knowingly. "My father got it for me from Paris." She said 'Paris' with a French accent. "You can borrow it anytime, if you want."

I shook my head. "It's fine." I turned to Caroline, who was wearing a light blue, mid-thigh length See by Chloe pleated Chambray skirt, tucked into it was a Marc by Marc Jacobs 'Simone' silk blouse. She had Cole Haan 'Air Tantivy' riding boots on that went up to her knees and where the boots up off DKNY hosiery pointelle boot toppers started and went up almost to her mid-thigh, leaving at least two-inches of pale, but alluring, pieces of skin exposed. It was so Caroline; sweet and simple, but sexy and alluring.

"You look so cute and chic today, Caroline." I commented. "Where did you get your skirt?"

Caroline blushed and tucked an auburn lock of hair behind her ear. "I got it from Nordstrom in New York- thanks."

"So, Bonnie," Frances said, louder than necessary. I looked to her, she was wearing a skirt almost like Caroline's, but it was fuchsia and probably not designer. "How was Miami?"

I sighed and glanced at Caroline, almost like it was her fault Frances was here. "I was in California, not Miami."

Frances's face turned beet red and her eyes flickered to Vicki and Sue, then quickly back to me, looking panicked. "Sorry!"

"It's fine, Frances. It happens to everyone," I said, smiling kindly at the other girl.

"So what does you schedule look like?" Meredith asked.

I cleared my throat, stalling. It was awkward talking about classes in front of Meredith and Caroline because they were both smart, striving young woman who were born for Ivy Leagues. I was not, and I didn't like the outcome of my schedule. "Honors American History, AP French, AP Chemistry, Honors calculus and my two electives; creative writing and modern literature."

"Wow … Honors _and _Advanced Placement." Caroline said her tone skeptical. "How did you manage that?"

"What does that mean?" I snapped, meeting her gaze with hard eyes; was she saying she didn't think I was smart enough."

She quickly dropped her eyes.

Meredith's voice sounded excited. "Bonnie, that's great! Those classes are sure to get you into Yale." Her exotic, pretty face beamed at me.

My own eyes dropped to the ground at the mention of Yale; I had forgotten my old dream of going there. It was kind of sweet that Meredith had remembered.

Suddenly something occurred to me; I could sit around and mindlessly fulfill my role as Queen for the remainder or my time at Robert E. Lee or I could step up to the plate and take charge; make a name for myself.

I sipped on my iced coffee and looked at Sue, Vicki and Frances, and then looked to either side of me at Meredith and Caroline. "Sleepover at my house tonight. 7:30, don't be late!" The shock on the ladies in waiting's faces quickly faded into excitement. I stood, grabbed my purse and started toward my first period.

Meredith and Caroline caught up with me, which was unexpected but I played it cool. "Hello, girls."

"Did you forget about our plan?" Caroline whispered.

"Because we gave news." Meredith put in.

I continued walking, as if I hadn't heard them. Then I turned into the girls' bathroom and banged once on all the closed stalls. "Royalty privilege, leave now."

Scared girls bustled quickly out of the stall.

I turned to Meredith and Caroline. "Talk," I demanded.

.

**A/N So Bonnie is trying to embrace her inner Queen, good or bad? As always, I ask you to please leave a review :)**

**Chapter Title:**

**Material Girl by Madonna**


	6. Obsession

**Chapter 5**

* * *

Caroline smiled and sat down on the marble sink counter, crossing her legs primly. "As far as the entire student body knows while you were away in sunny California you met a very good-looking surfer boy named Adam and you two had a very romantic summer fling. You even have proof if someone asks." She opens her silver See by Chloe 'Butterfly Flap Party Pouch' Shoulder bag and pulls out a glossy picture of a hot shirtless guy posing on the beach and looking past the camera lovingly- to me, as people would think.

I smiled at her. "Impressive. Meredith?"

Caroline checked her hair for split ends and Meredith suddenly gets very interested in her iPhone.

"So are you going to tell me what you found out?" I pressed. Meredith and Caroline exchanged a glance.

"Technically," Caroline started, "we didn't find anything."

"What?" I asked, not comprehending.

"Strangely, he doesn't have a Facebook." She said.

"And not just that," Meredith interrupted. "We couldn't find _anything _on a Stefan Salvatore in the general area- which is even more odd seeing as his parents are one of the founding families-"

"But that brings us to something _even _weirder." Caroline said, making a weird face. "Aparently, they don't even have …" She trailed off, looking puzzled.

"Don't have what?" I pressed impatiently; the bell was going to ring any moment.

"There are no records of them ever having children." Meredith finished.

I scoffed, not believing them- then seen the look on each of their faces. I swallowed loudly and responded to the staring girls with disturbed looks plastered on each of their pretty faces. "That's not possible."

"Trust us," Caroline said. "We dug as far as we could. Went through the internet, reference books at the library, newspaper headlines and birth certificates. There's no record of any Stefan and Damon Salvatore ever being born."

"Well, recently." Meredith said in a small voice. She had strayed away to stare at herself in the mirror. Now her gaze flickered to us in the mirror. "I didn't want to tell you, Caroline, until I dug deeper. But …" She took a deep and turned towards us swiftly. "There was a Stefan and Damon Salvatore in Fells Church … in 1864."

My face was blank and uncomprehending, then her words slowly sank in. I shook my head, scoffing. "That's not possible!" I repeated.

Caroline nodded along. "Those must be their ancestors or something. Right, Bonnie?"

"Right," I agreed. "Anyways … they're way to young looking!"

Caroline and I laughed but Meredith's face was still disturbed.

"Oh, c'mon, Merry. You're not actually considering that they're _that _old, are you? That would make Stefan …" I calculated in my head. "147 years old."

Meredith smiled and shook her head, but it was hardly convincing. "You're right, it's impossible." She brushed by Caroline and I. "I'll meet you guys after school."

"I thought we were doing lunch?" Caroline pouted.

Meredith paused then turned back, with a strange look on her face. "Oh, right." She breathed, then looked around the bathroom like she was looking for an excuse. "I'm sorry, I made another commitment." She pulled open the door then turned the corner.

I looked at Caroline. "Is she?-" I started to ask, and then the bell rang for first period. "Crap," I muttered.

Caroline played with her fingers. "I'll see you, Bonnie." She seemed greatly affected by Meredith's odd behavior. "Bye," then she left the bathroom.

I was left standing alone. I was just getting to the door when the warning bell rang. "Shit," I breathed then whipped the door open and turned sharply around the corner. "Oh!" I gasped, colliding with another student- who was wearing intoxicating Drakkar Noir cologne and a tight black John Varvatos shirt. Actually, everything from his soft black boots to his dark sunglasses was from the John Varvatos collection.

For the first time since colliding with the stranger, I realized I was sitting on the floor. I blushed and mumbled a stupid 'sorry'.

The stranger let out an enchanting chuckle and held out his hand. "My apologies." He said- his voice was silky yet husky at the same time.

I took his hand and pulled myself up. "I'm not always this uncoordinated- I was just in a hurry and it's first day so I didn't want to be late …" I realized I was mumbling, I tucked a piece of my deep red hair out of my face and smiled politely and apologetically at the man. "I'm Bonnie."

He had silky dark hair and perfect bone structure. He smirked his perfect pale lips, "I'm Damon." And with that he took off his John Varvatos sunglasses and exposed breath black eyes, so dark I couldn't tell the pupil apart from the color. Black on black eyes.

I was so preoccupied staring into his eyes that it came as a shock when I finally realized he said his name was Damon. "Damon Salvatore?" I blurted, then covered my mouth.

His eyebrows pinched. "Have we met?"

I shook my head, stepping around him. "Nope! Anyways, I really have to go." I started down the hall- when I was at least halfway down the hall though he spoke.

"Hopefully I'll see you again, soon, Bonnie."

When I turned back he was gone.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. I was greeted by people I hardly recognized and a few random people I could hardly call my friends. By the end of the day I was exhausted from keeping up appearances and my face muscled felt strained from all the fake smiling I'd been doing.

I arrived at my locker as everyone bustled around me, heading home or to after school plans or extracurricular activities. I opened my locker and pulled out by burgundy wool peacoat and slipped it on.

Before I could even start contemplate joining a dreaded extracurricular Frances Delacur stopped beside me. "Is it true?" she asked, her eyes widening slightly.

"Be more specific?" I asked and slung my Marc Jacob's bag over my shoulder.

"About Adam, the hot guy from Cali," she smirked devilishly.

I cleared my throat; whoops, I had forgotten all about that. I slammed my locker shut, stalling for time. Then turned to Frances with an excited but secretive expression on. "Oh, yes."

She looked ready to bombard me with questions but at that moment Stefan walked by. He looked at me as he passed then looked away. I looked to Frances, cutting off her inane question. "Sorry, Frances; I don't kiss and tell. See you tonight at the sleepover."

I turned away from Frances without another word and fell into step beside Stefan. "Hey, stranger," I greeted him with what I hope was an enchanting giggle.

"Hey," he glanced at me with stunning green eyes, not at beautiful as Damon's though, I noted. "Bonnie, right?"

I smiled; he remembered my name, which was a good sign. "The one and only. So how are you liking Crown Victoria?" I asked as we stepped out into the plaza.

The plaza was a courtyard in the middle on the school building and our large, state-of-the-art football field- which was a very new installment to me. The plaza had five picnic table, a hippie mini-forest with a small hill where the stoners liked to hang out. It had a coffee vendor, with a petite barista behind it, and a huge live oak in the center that towered over everyone and added a lush vibe. Along the paths from the parking lot and the football field or just around the plaza the oak's branches sprang out and curve over the path to create an archway for the students to walk through, almost like it was planned.

He slipped his school bag over his shoulder and looked around the ravishing plaza. "I think I might like it here," he smiled at me, but he didn't use his whole face. I wondered what was making him upset, and if it would be too personal to ask. "How about you?" Stefan said, pulling me from my thoughts. "Do you liking it around here? It looks like you'll fit it."

I blushed with pleasure and toyed with a Tiffany charm bracelet on my wrist, looking at all the students bustling around the plaza, some going home, some going to football and cheerleading practice, others filing back into the school for Spanish club or Chess club or whatever went on in there after hours. I smiled at my peers, they either waved as they passed or nudged their friends, all acknowledging the return of their Queen.

"Oh, it's not my first day." I responded. "Just my first day back."

Stefan opened his mouth to say more, then as Parker Belmont walked by (possibly on his way to Stoner Hill) he looked up and met my eyes, in the next second a wide, slightly lazy, smile was on his face and he was walking up the stairs to join me and Stefan. There were two things I always noticed about Parker; A) He was always slightly stoned and B) He sort of looked like Sebastian Stan.

"Bonnie McCullough! Dollface, c'mere and give ol' Parker a hug!" I giggled as Parker pulled me into a hug- he smelled, as always, like marijuana and tree sap. He held me back and looked into my eyes with his cloudy blue ones. "Why haven't you called?" he asked with mock devastation. "I've pacing and pacing around my room waiting for the love of my life to call-"

I pushed his shoulder and he stumbled back slightly, laughing. "Oh shut up, Parker." I giggled, then realized Stefan was still standing there, watching Parker's performance with amusement.

Parker noticed Stefan at the same time I did. His eyes flashed back to me with a small smile on his lips, the look said '_Who's this young fellow?_', in Parker speak. I gave him a warning look that said '_Be nice or you're totally not my best guy friend anymore'_.

"Hey, man." Parker said, being nice to the guy he thinks I'm trying to hook with. Parker held out his fist.

Stefan hit his fist with Parkers hesitantly. "Hey," his eyes held questions.

"Parker's like my brother," I explained. "My mom dated his dad before she got married and Parker and I started hanging out."

Stefan smiled. "Okay, hey, Parker. Good to meet you."

I looked at Parker, telling him with my eyes that we'd catch up later and to get lost.

Parker bowed and pulled me into another hug. "I have some business to attend to," he lied, chuckling. Then he squinted as he backed up. "Remember, I'm always watching!" Then he turned and skipped down the rest of the stairs.

I shook my head, watching Parker leave; he was one person I especially found myself missing in California because of his unique personality. I looked back to Stefan with a wide smile on my face. Maybe he and I could hang out this evening. "So-"

"I have to go," Stefan said at the same time as me. "I'm sorry, but I was thinking about joining the football team and tryouts start soon."

The disappointment must have been obvious on my face, so I put on a bubbly smile instead, silently plotting. If I wanted to get closer to Stefan, there was only one thing I could do- and that involved losing my dignity and probably publicly embarrassing me. "Oh my gosh, that is so cool! Even ironic, since I'm trying out for the Cheerleading team."

There was something in his eyes I couldn't put my finger on. "You are?"

I nodded, smiling. "Yes!" No, technically I wasn't; they would let me in as soon as I walked onto the field. But it couldn't hurt to try.

.

**A/N So Bonnie's met both brothers, which one do you think she holds the most attraction to, Stefan or Damon?  
**

**I added a character named Parker Belmont who isn't in the Vampire Diaries, in case you didn't notice. I thought it was just a fun idea! Any thoughts on Parker?**

**Reviews are always welcome!  
**

**Chapter Title:**

**Obsession by Sky Ferriera**


	7. All We'd Ever Need

**Chapter 6**

* * *

Stefan walked with me to the football field, occasionally asking about what classes I was taking and about my departure from Fells Church. I told him the story I had been telling people all day; 'I just needed to get away!' It was true enough.

We stopped when we got to the field, Stefan was about to turn away when I called him back. "Thanks for walking me over." As if he had a choice.

He smiled politely. "No problem."

Why was he acting so distant? Then it hit me; because he thought I had a boyfriend! He must have already heard the "Adam" rumor. Great- time for phase two. I swung my curly red over my shoulder and brushed his forearm. "Good luck," then I turned away and jogged to where I assumed cheerleading try-outs were being held. I quickly went off to the changing room; hoping my old gym clothes were still in my locker. Thankfully, they were.

I quickly changed into my blue Lululemon tank top and black spandex gym shorts. Wondering if it would be cold, I grabbed my purple sweater.

Just as I joined the circle of stretching girls Caroline came rushing up to me. "Bonnie, you're joining? This is great! I'll definitely vote for you."

Deciding it was warm enough I set my sweater on the bench. I stepped closer to her and spoke in a hushed tone. "Yes, well, anything for the _team._" She seemed confused. I tilted my head towards Stefan. "Phase one is complete!"

She smiled, as if she wasn't as excited about this news as me. "That's great!"

My face dropped. "You seemed more excited about me joining the squad."

She shrugged. "Well, of course I am … but you heard what Meredith said this morning; something's up with the Salvatore brother's, Bonnie, and I'm … afraid."

I raised my eyebrows. "Look: All I know is that they are both relatively normal and right now things are on the right track with Stefan. If you want to give up on the mission then fine- but I can promise you there is nothing bizarre about Stefan and Damon- except the fact that they're excruciatingly hot-"

"You-met Damon?" Caroline asked, her eyes flashing- with worry. Or was it jealousy? Or maybe fear.

"Yeah," I responded, stepping toward the change room. "Do you have some extra shoes I could borrow? This whole cheerleading thing was sort of last minute." I changed the subject inconspicuously, looking at my booties.

Caroline scratched her forehead and looked around the field, apparently she wasn't distracted. "Yeah." She bended down and pulled out new-looking running shoes from her duffel back. As I sat down and started taking my booties off and slipping on the running shoes she started talking again. "Bonnie … I've got to tell you something."

Just then there was a loud screech from the parking lot. Everyone turned and stared, I stood and looked toward the parking lot.

The person was in a vibrant red Ferrari and was getting out now. He turned and fixed the collar on his leather jacket and slipped on John Varvatos sunglasses; Damon Salvatore. Okay, storming in like this and wearing all black he did look unusually dangerous.

But damn, he looked _good. _

I glance at Caroline to see if she had the same thought, but her face was drained of color and her right hand was gripping her forearm, her fingernails dug into the skin, drawing blood.

"Oh my god, Caroline!" I try to pull her hand away from her arm.

Her gaze flickered to me, "I have to go," she turned and jogged into the change rooms.

I turned back and gasped; Damon was standing right in front of me. "Oh."

He looked me up and down and I was suddenly very aware of the fact that I was standing in front of this gorgeous man in short shorts and a tank top. "Hello, Bonnie."

What did he expect me to say? _Thank for scaring away my friend, Damon. By the way; you're super attractive and there's nothing weird about the way you just arrived and are suddenly standing directly in front of me in less than 10 seconds of your arrival._ I would have accepted the fact that he was just a really fast sprinter- except he looked like he just stepped off a John Varvatos runway; not a hair out of place, perfectly coiffed.

My eyes caught movement to the left of Damon's head and I noticed Stefan standing there, with the football in his hands, staring at Damon and me.

I put my hand on my neck, feeling the need to do something with my hands. "What are you doing here, Damon?"

He took his sunglasses off and tucked them into the collar of his tight black shirt; my eyes met black on black ones. "Just decided to … drop by." He turned and did a tiny wave to Stefan, who clenched his jaw.

I wrapped my arms around myself, thinking of Caroline's weird departure the moment she saw Damon, and how she had gripped her arm so fiercely. Suddenly something clicked. "Did something happen between you and Caroline this morning?" I asked Damon, putting my hands on my slender hips.

He turned back to me, looking confused- I could tell he was playing it up. "No. Why do you ask? Is she alright?"

Definitely playing it up, I thought. He was a good actor, but not good enough to fool me. I gave him a look that would kill any man standing in his place. "You listen to me; touch Caroline again and I'll make your life a living hell, you got that?" I turned around, but not before I could see the look on Damon's face; angry, but with a hint of appreciation and respect.

Pervert.

After tryouts (three hours full of high kicks and yelling) I threw on my sweater, too tired to change. I was heading toward my car when Stefan caught up with me. I didn't say a word to him; it was his fault Damon was here and his fault I even joined stupid cheerleading.

"I'm so sorry about my brother," Stefan said, his voice full of remorse. "He's volatile and shouldn't even be here. It's all my fault."

I couldn't help myself; I turned to him and sighed. "It's not your fault." I pulled out my car keys and pressed the button to unlock it when we were a few feet away. "Why is he such an ass, anyways?"

Stefan laughed- he had a nice laugh. It sounded pure, but there was an under lying emotion that I didn't understand- almost like he was sharing a private joke with himself. "I supposed that's just the way he is, but he's not all bad."

I gave him a look that suggested he was wrong.

Stefan leaned in closer, placing his hands the car and closing in on me. "But there's things about him … that you don't know about- that you _can't _know about."

"What do you mean?" I asked, using the same hush tone he used.

Stefan looked around us, at the few kids walking to their cars. Finally he decided it was safe to speak. "He's … far more dangerous than you could ever imagine, Bonnie."

His words sent a chill down my spine and made my heart beat faster with fear, I didn't even know why I was afraid. "How?" I heard myself ask, almost inaudibly.

Stefan dropped his arms and looked at me sincerely. "Just be careful, alright? I'll be watching out for you too, if that's alright."

When I nodded he smirked, turned into the trees and melted in with the darkness.

I turned toward my car and hopped in. I didn't start the car up, I just sat there; my brain still needed time to think about this. So Damon really _was _an ex-con? Was Stefan telling me not to anger him? And what had Damon done to Caroline? My hands clenched around the steering wheel; I longed for the days when my problems revolved around the bucket and shovel in the sandbox and Barbie dolls.

"I swear to god if Damon did anything to Caroline," I said aloud, stilling sitting in my parked car, gripping the steering wheel.

I remembered the time when Caroline, Meredith and I used to play in the Old Wood outside Meredith's house before her mom told us it was too dangerous. I remembered the games we used to play in the forest, running around playing tag, hide and seek, we even used to play fake vampires. It was all so simple then, so easy.

I couldn't help but think I had done it to myself. Why did I have to get involved with Matt Honeycutt? Oh yeah, because he was mildly attractive in a boy-ish sort of way and his sister, Vicky, is one of my ladies in waiting. _God, _what I wouldn't give to take back the last two years of my life.

Matt had seemed so perfect! What with that perfect blond hair, his washboard abs, and his chiseled jaw. He came from a good family, was in AP classes, he was sweet and kind and didn't go out of the way to get a girl. He was my kind of guy- before everything fell apart.

Just then there was a knock on my window- and I looked up to meet the cold, vibrant blue eyes of Matt Honeycutt.

I froze, looking at him. He still looked the same; I was surprised I hadn't seen him at school today. He knocked on the window again, his eyes detached.

I hesitantly rolled it down; he didn't seem like a threat, and his movements were slow and controlled. Almost like he had been forced to come over and talk to me. "Hey," I breathed, still just taking in him being here.

"I wasn't expecting you for another week or so," Matt answered, looking into my eyes. They softened a fraction. "How are you?"

I squinted. "Do you really care?"

"Don't be silly, Bonnie; of course I do." He scratched his jaw- I remembered he did this when he got uncomfortable. "I was looking for you today."

I swallowed hard and looked straight out my windshield. "Did … they ever find him?" I couldn't help myself; I had been wondering this question throughout my time in California.

Matt didn't answer for a long time. Then he stood and walked away. I was shocked for a second, then jumped when he opened my passenger door and got in. "No, they didn't."

It was quiet in the car as his words hung in the air. I should have felt relief but instead all I felt was regret. We should have done something; we should have tried to stop him. Instead we just let him go; now he could be anywhere.

Matt suddenly groaned and let his head fall in his hands. "I want to take it all back," he mumbled into his big hands.

I rested my hand on his back, trying to be comforting. "Me too."

Matt looked up at me, his eyes were bloodshot. "You know after he followed us that night all I could think about was how I had gotten mad at him. I killed my little brother," Matt said. His face crumpled and his face fell into his hands again.

"No you didn't, Matt." I said, trying to keep my voice from shaking. "It was his choice. His choice to run away." I could feel the tears coming on; it felt like I might break down at any moment like Matt. Michael's childish face kept flashing in my mind, his despair that night when he had found us. Matt shouting at him, telling him to get lost. Matt and I so shocked when Michael banged on the car roof, catching us in the act. He was only fifteen! "It … wasn't our fault." My voice was shaking- please god, I have to keep it together. Silent tears fell down my cheeks and I let out a quiet, stuttering breath. "He's okay. He has to be okay."

I just couldn't bare it anymore; I knew my words were lies. I found myself collapsing onto Matt's quaking form and wrapping my arms around him.

One word kept running through my mind:

_Michael, Michael, Michael …_

I finally pulled away, drying my tears. Matt pulled away too, and I see that his face was long since dry. He had kept holding me while I was crying. I pondered his behavior while drying my eyes.

"Wow," he breathed the intense feel in the air. "That was emotional."

And –just like that- he made me laugh. I looked at him. "Thanks."

He shrugged, and then he got that look on his face- like a confession was coming on. I turned toward him in my seat, curious. "What is it?"

"Did I see you talking to Stefan Salvatore?" He rushed it out- I could tell it was a cover up. He actually wanted to say something else.

I nodded. "We're sort of friends- but that's not what you wanted to say."

He licked his lips and rubbed his chiseled jaw, like they do in movies. "Look, I'm sorry for the way things ended between us, Bonnie. I really care about you and I'm sorry if I hurt you."

I shook my head. "It's okay; I understand. I knew it would be hard for you, I didn't want to make anything harder."

He leaned forward and took my hands. "I loved you; you were all I wanted in life, all I needed. I just wish I had told you that then.'

I dropped my head to look at our hands. Then I felt my eyes start to sting with new tears. "It's okay."

"No, it's not." He insisted, a hurt look coming to his shocking blue eyes. "I can tell; I can see it in your eyes, even now. Every time I would touch you … I knew you wanted something more. And I'm so sorry that I couldn't give that to you."

A lump had started to form in my throat, and now it felt like I couldn't speak- but I managed. "No, Matt. It's not your fault. It was me, all me. I was looking for something bigger than big." I looked up into his eyes. "Bigger than what we had- so I'm sorry." It felt good to clear everything up between us after this long, but I couldn't help the heart shattering feeling that was rumbling inside me. It felt like I could hardly breathe- because I knew one thing was for certain in this moment; Matt and I were truly finished.

He nodded and reached for his car handle, but before leaving he turned back. "I should have said all of those things that I kept inside of me," then he gave me a small smile and closed the door softly behind him.

.

**A/N So thoughts on what made Bonnie leave Fells Church? What would you have done? As always, I ask for you to take a moment to review- at least so I can thank you for reading! :) I'm nice! Hugs and Kisses -Simmy  
**

**Chapter Title:**

**All We'd Ever Need by Lady Antebellum**


	8. Don't You Want Me?

**Chapter 7**

* * *

I hastily did my hair Saturday morning, making sure there were wisps in all the right places and it fell perfectly. Today I was going to Caroline's house, staging a casual run-in with Stefan, where I would ask him to go to the Spring Talent show with me. I know it's a bold move but it was a school function and he would have no choice but to agree.

The Spring Talent show wasn't a stupid assembly gathering, it was a big event that many students looked forward to. It was formally known as the Constance Peace Gala. Students and adults alike went dressed in evening attire and you had to audition to be in the Gala. It was a pretty huge deal for the town of Fells Church- and it used to be for me. But not anymore.

I went to my closet and groaned internally; after just two days of being back my closet was already a mess. I scrambled to the back of my closet and went through racks of dresses; it was sunny out today and a dress would be appropriate. I quickly slid on an Eliza J Belted cotton party dress that accentuated my petite waist and it's vibrant colors made my pale skin look slightly flushed. I then went to my shoes, picking out red Manolo Blahnik 'Campy' pumps. I threw on a Veda cropped leather jacket and grabbed my dark coral Marc by Marc Jacobs hobo bag.

As I flew down the stairs I called to my mom, "I'm going out, don't wait up!"

When I got to Caroline's Stefan was taking out the trash, just as I hoped. I hastily climbed out of my car and walked up to him.

"Hey!" I said.

Stefan looked up, meeting my gaze. "Hey, Bonnie."

I walked closer, very aware that his eyes were averted rather than raking over my ensemble or staring into my eyes. This confused me. He seemed like a nice guy, not someone who would lead a girl on, so what was the problem? Had I accidentally said something, did he really care about his brother and I crossed the line by being rude? "So I have to ask … did I do something to offend you?"

He looked shocked that I would come to that conclusion. "No. Why would you think that?"

I shrugged. "Well you've been acting really weird."

Stefan looked like he wanted to say something, but decided not to. "I'm sorry about that."

I decided to let it go and smiled softly, remembering why I was here. "No worries. Anyways, I was going to ask you if you wanted to the Spring Talent show aka the Constance Peace Gala with me." My heart pounded as Stefan ran his hand through his hair with an expression that could only be described as reluctant ad uncomfortable.

He turned to me. "Look, Bonnie, you're cool and all but I just don't think that would be a good idea." He sighed a looked down.

Oh god, he can't do this. He can't humiliate me like this. He can't turn me down and tell me he isn't interested when everyone is expecting him and I to become an item. I rushed out my next words, it was all I could do to keep from exploding with embarrassment. "Of course we'll go as friends. I know how hard it can be to be new on the scene and I could introduce you to a few people." I pulled on the sleeves of my cropped leather jacket, waiting as he pondered this.

He smiled and looked up at me. "Actually that would be kind of fun. Are you going to be in the talent show?"

I felt my heart drop, even though I knew he was joking. "No, I'm not." Before Michael went missing I would have been down for the Talent Show but then I lost my inspiration, my muse, and my reason for performing. I still couldn't believe how much I had lost in that one night, in that one _moment. _

Stefan stretched and looked back at his house then back at me. "So I'll see you then, right?"

I nodded. "Pick me up at eight."

That night I got home late, Caroline and I had went through her closet looking for something sexy but appropriate to wear to the Talent Show.

When I agreed I had no idea how long that could possibly take, but three hours later she finally decided on a beautiful silver and gold Alberto Makali Ombre Sequin gown. I thought she might be overpowering her own natural beauty at first- what with the amazingness of the dress- but when she tried it on it looked absolutely gorgeous on here. The silver and gold sequins actually color brought out the red tones in her hair and made her green eyes pop. Not to mention it did wonders for her curves.

Just as I was leaving Caroline asked me a question. "So are you joining Drama Club, again?"

I paused, cringing. This was another one of the many downsides of coming home; everyone expected you to be into the same things and pick up right where you left off. Except I really liked acting- I used to be the star of drama club. And everything seemed so low right now, I really needed a pick-me-up. I smiled at Caroline. "When's the next rehearsal?"

Caroline smiled. "This Thursday, and I already told Miss Sherman that you were joining so you don't have to worry."

"How did you know I was going to say yes?" I asked.

Caroline stepped forward and put a hand on my arm. "Because I know you, Bonnie. Drama Club used to be your life. And don't give me that look," She said when I rolled my eyes. "No matter how lame that sounds it's the truth. I knew you couldn't just let it go like other things."

I knew she was referring to me not playing the piano or singing anymore. "How did you know about that?"

She squinted. "I have my ways." Then gave me a soft smile, "Your mom told me; she's worried."

I shrugged. "I'm fine."

"Are you?"

There was a long pause, finally I answered. "Yes, I've just got a lot to deal with- being back and all."

Caroline nodded. "You know you can always come to me, right?"

It was my turn to nod. "Of course."

When I got home that night I was surprised to find my mother in the living room with Mahouri, the town seamstress. In the middle of the living room was a gold Aidan Mattox 'Cold Shoulder' sequin dress. The shoulders were cut out and it was shaped like a shift dress, and it went mid-thigh. My mother and Mahouri were on either side of it, Mahouri was straightening out the shoulder straps and my mom had a manicured nail pressed against her chin. "It looks wonderful, Mahouri. She's going to love it."

"Who's going to love it?" I asked as I stepped into the room.

My mother stepped away from the dress and smiled at me. "You, my dear. What do you think?"

I stepped toward it and ran my fingers along the sequins. "It's beautiful- but for what occasion am I to wear it to?"

She smiled, straightening out the cowl neck. "The Constance Peace Gala, sweetie."

My palms started to get sweaty and I dreaded the thought. "But ... it's not formal enough- since I'm not performing. I was going to pick out an evening gown."

She gave me a look. "Sweetheart, you are performing this year."

My heart stopped beating. "What?" I couldn't even hear my voice- I was so shocked.

"I already signed you up for an audition tomorrow- but I'm very sure that Miss Sherman will let you be in the show anyway."

Her voice sounded far off- why was she doing this to me? "Mom, I can't be in the show." I said. "I-I can't even sing anymore let alone-do it in front of everyone." I started to see tiny gray spots in front of my eyes and it became hard to breathe.

My mom didn't seem to notice, she looked at the frock and fixed the gold strap. "Nonsense; you've been waiting for this forever and I'm not going to let you throw away this extraordinary opportunity to showcase your talent- wait, Bonnie, where are you going? You have to try on the dress!"

I heard her calls to me as I ran up the stairs, but barely even flinched. How could I do this? I couldn't do this! My throat closed up with tears.

After what happened with Michael and Matt I had tried to play and sing at aunt Mimi's but I lost all inspiration, I had lost my voice.

I dropped onto my duvet and buried my face in my pillow. Now I had to find it again by tomorrow? Not likely.

I stayed in bed a moment longer, not thinking. Then I realized I had two options; A) I could lay in bed and then skip the auditions tomorrow and feel sorry for myself or B) I could practice tonight and then rock the auditions.

I wished I could pick the latter ... But Bonnie McCullough never backed down!

Sitting up and brushing my hair back from my face, I hopped off my bed and went over to the far corner of my room, in front of my window, where my piano was sitting. I shuffled through some sheet music.

"No ... No ... Oh, god no ... Hmm" I said when I finally came to a song that was good enough. My heart beat faster as I put it against thet stand and played the first note. I paused- it hung in the air. Such a pure, melancholy note.

I took a deep breath, steadying my racing pulse. I started with the chorus, testing. I played the intro to the chorus first, then started to sing. "I should have been chasing you, I should have been trying to prove, that you were all that mattered to me." To my intense surprised I was hitting the notes, keeping the melody in tone and playing it smoothly at the same time. My heart raced. "I should've said all those things that I kept inside of me," I remembered what Matt had said, capturing that emotion, and soon found I was tearing up. "Then maybe I could've made you believe. That was we had was all we'd ever need."

I started playing the second verse, which was set to the key of a man, then stopped; nothing was more depressing than singing a duet by yourself. So I decided to save that song for when I had somebody to sing it with.

I put the sheet music aside and shuffled through some more songs. I giggled as I came across my mom's favorite song for me to sing; My Favorite Things from The Sound Of Music. I gave a nostalgic sigh and carried on shuffling through. I thought maybe I could sing a song that made sense to my situation right now, but no song seemed to fit it.

I decided to go with a song I knew I could do and stop comparing it to my life. I pulled out Defying Gravity and set it against the stand. But before I could even get to the second intro, my sister burst into my room.

"What are you doing?" Katherine asked, her eyes flashing.

I was stunned. "What does it look like I'm doing?" I stood up from my piano chair and stepped around it so I was facing her and crossed my arms. "What are _you _doing barging into my room?"

Her chin was jutted out and she was squinting- somehow she still looked angelic. "I was trying to sleep and then I heard you squawking away."

Her comment hurt, but I didn't show it. Instead I smiled. "Jealous much?"

"Hardly." She said.

I laughed and shook my head as if she was the pettiest thing in the world and turned away from her, back to my piano. "I really don't have time for this; mom got me an audition for the Constance Peace Gala and I have to practice." I turned to Katherine and smiled. "My mom's really excited- she even got me a magnificent dress." I squinted, flaunting how much my mom would do for me in Katherine's face.

Katherine smiled, like she was sharing some private joke with herself- like she knew more than me. "I guess I'll leave it to you, then. Just keep it down; you're loud enough to wake the dead."

.

**A/N As always, take a moment to leave a review please, I greatly enjoy reading your comments! :)**

**Chapter Title:**

**Don't You Want Me? by The Human League  
**


	9. Shine

**Chapter 8**

* * *

Miss Sherman's classroom smelled like mothballs and old books. At the front of the room was a cluttered desk on top of a mini-stage. Miss S liked to surround herself with theater. One the walls were posters of Broadway musicals from 'Wicked' to 'Les Miserables'.

Miss S greeted me with a hug and a pat on the cheek. "Bonnie McCullough, I never thought I'd see you back here!" She fixed her plain black glasses. Miss S has short, curly black hair, a long neck, black eyes and her lips are always pursed. She always wore black, black turtleneck and black pants. It was her thing.

"Hey, Miss S!" I greeted her. Truth was: She has always been my favorite teacher and even though everyone thought she was obsessive and too direct I had this sort of admiration for her- and she had a soft spot for me. "How's Arnold?" Arnold's her beagle and pretty much the only thing she showed affection for- other than the theater.

Her face instantly lit up. "He's been doing fine lately. Good on you for remembering." She stage winked at me then turned to the students who were conversing. She clapped her hands once and their heads snapped to her. "Pupils, take your seats. It is time to audition for the part of Juliet."

My heart dropped. "You're doing auditions today?"

Miss S looked at me. "Yes, Bonnie. I'm so very sorry." She pressed her lips together, like it was a great loss.

I swallowed; my throat felt thick. I really wanted to star in the production this year. There had to be some way … Then the light bulb went on over my head; I knew Romeo and Juliet by heart; I could probably still audition. I stepped toward Miss Sherman and she looked at me, surprised I approached her and didn't take my seat.

"Yes, Bonnie?"

"Miss S, do you think I could still audition?" I gave her my puppy dog face.

She smiled and straightened out the scripts on her desk, before picking up one with a big letter 'B' on it. "I think you can." She handed the script to me. I tried to contain my glee. "Learn Juliet's monologue and you will be the last to audition." She had a twinkle in her eyes as she gestured me to my seat. "Good luck."

Caroline auditioned first, I had to admit it was good but she lacked depth and emotion. It felt like she was reading it from a script, and that was not the point of acting. The point was portraying the emotion for the audience and touching them, making them believe it. Caroline was not believable.

The next to go was Frances Delacur. She stuttered and giggled randomly. It felt like she didn't know her lines well. Definitely not leading lady material.

Before the next girl could audition Parker Belmont threw open the door. He strolled in, holding a green army-style jacket in his left hand and running through his dark blond hair. "Sorry I'm late, Miss Sherman, I got held up." His humorous cloudy blue eyes met mine and he smirked slightly.

Miss S sighed and pressed toe fingers to her temple. "Sit down, Parker."

He dropped into the seat beside me and dropped his backpack on the floor beside him. "Hey, little lady," Parker greeted me.

I leaned in to whisper to him. "What are you doing in Drama Club?"

Parker leaned lazily back in his chair, one arm draped over his desk. "I'm considering it Community Service."

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously?"

Parker smiled. "What are _you _doing here?"

I shrugged. "I like to act- I just never thought it was your forte."

His smile dropped and he turned his head away from me. He looked like he was going to say something else but them Miss S started talking again. "Thank you, Shelly. Bonnie?"

I stood up, taking a deep breath then walking up on stage. I looked around at my peers and then mentally prepared myself. I am Juliet. Romeo, my one true love, was just banished and my husband killed my cousin. As I got into character Parker leaned forward on his desk, setting his chin in his palm and staring at me intensely. Caroline shook her hair back from her face and a sly smile was on her face: She thought I was going to fail.

I almost laughed; in her dreams. I let out a huge breath and looked to Miss Sherman. "Whenever you're ready," she said.

I cleared my throat and started, deciding to start off with a frustrated tone. "Shall I speak ill of him that is my husband? Ah, poor my lord, what tongue shall smooth thy name. When I, thy three-hours wife, have mangled it?" I paused, switching emotions to sad and helpless, already trying to channel my tears. "But wherefore, villain, didst thou kill my cousin? That villain cousin would have killed my husband." A tear fell down my cheek and I bent my head. "Back, foolish tears, back to your native spring! Your tributary drops belong to woe, which you, mistaking, offer up to joy." I lifted my head, knowing I was frowning and my face and eyes were glistening with tears.

When I lifted my head I caught sight of Caroline; her jaw was tight and her eyes were fiery; she didn't like it when someone did something better than her. The rest of the class was watching me with a dazed expression, Miss S wore a soft smile and Parker was watching me with the same intense expression- but I was sure I seen some admiration there.

"My husband lives, that Tybalt would have slain; and Tybalt's dead, that would have slain my husband. All this comfort; wherefore I weep then?" I threw my hands up, then walked to the far end of the stage, pressing a hand to my heart. "Tybalt is dead, and Romeo-banished!" My tone was frustrated, like I didn't understand. "Hath slain ten thousand Tybalts. Tybalt's death was woe enough," I went to stand back in the middle of the stage and placed my hands at my side as I spoke. "if it had ended there; or, if sour woe delights in fellowship and needly will be ranked with other grief's, why followed not when she said 'Tybalt's dead.'"

I swallowed once and kept that emotion a moment longer, then bowed, smiled and wiped away my fake tears.

Miss S stood and clapped. "Bravo, bravo!"

The rest of the students joined in, and then reluctantly, Caroline did as well.

I skipped off the mini-stage and Miss S patted me on the back.

When Drama Club adjourned Parker swung his backpack over his shoulder and picked up his jacket. I did the same and then pushed my chair in. As I was leaving Parker stopped me. "I think someone need's a ride home," He said pointedly.

I smiled and raised my eyebrow. "I have a car, Parker."

Parker's eyes widened and he smiled wide. "I was talking about myself, doll face."

I giggled. "Alright, I haven't seen your mom in a while so maybe I can stay for a bit."

Parker bent his head and smiled.

I was about to ask him what the smile was about but then Miss S called me back "Bonnie, can I speak to you for a moment."

I looked back at her and then glanced at Parker. "I'll meet you at my car." When I got to Miss Sherman's desk I sat down in the chair closest to it and swept my hair over my shoulder. "What's up, Miss S?" I had a feeling I knew exactly what was up.

She took her glasses off and set them on top of her head. "I thought maybe we could talk about the Constance Peace Gala."

My heart beat faster. "Sure."

She smiled, her dark eyes sparkling. "The judges and myself thought your audition this evening was very lovely." Miss S paused. "So it would be my pleasure to welcome you to the line-up of the Constance Peace Gala."

My jaw dropped. "You must be joking!" I couldn't help the happiness that bloomed inside me or the wide smile that crept onto my face. "This is such an honor." Miss S stood and I went in for the hug. I pulled away and ran both hands through my hair. "I can't believe this."

She let out a breath and brushed a lock of brown curly hair out of her face. "Tomorrow after school there's a meeting. Come prepared with your sheet music, about four or five songs, so our band can learn it-"

I unintentionally cut her off, my heart pounded against my ribs. "Uhm, I was thinking maybe I could play my own music?"

Miss S squinted and then the corners of her mouth quirked up. "Interesting. You'll have to present the idea to the rest of the Gala board tomorrow- at the meeting."

Something suddenly occurred to me. "Oh, crap." I gave Miss S an apologetic look. "I have cheerleading practice tomorrow after school."

Miss S sighed and placed her hands on her desk, looking at me. "Look, Bonnie, I'm going to break this down for you- and it may come as a surprise that I am being so direct with you."

I could have laughed right then; Miss S was famous for telling people like it is.

"You have to prioritize, Bonnie." She said. "These are the years you are supposed to make huge choices. You're in Drama Club, cheerleading, and you're doing the Gala. The Drama Club is already taking up your lunch hours and a few select days after school. Now you have to worry about balancing the Constance Peace Gala and your cheerleading, as well?"

I swallowed. She was right, of course. "What do you suggest I do?"

She gave me an appraising look. "Since when are you into cheerleading, Bonnie? Unless there's another reason." Miss S gave me a knowing look.

I blushed. "Nope. I guess I'll just quit cheerleading." My heart sank a little; I would have to find another way to get closer to Stefan.

Miss S nodded once then shrugged, and she started picking up folders and scripts and stuffing them into her bag. "Do what you think you can do. If you can balance both, then fine. But if you know you can't then I suggest quitting one." She paused and looked seriously into my eyes. "I don't need to tell you how huge of a deal the Constance Peace Gala is. You already know what an honor it is to be chosen to perform. You are so talented, Bonnie. You could do great things if you just let yourself." Her mouth set into a smile, then quickly dropped. She was all business again. "Just to prove how much I believe in you I am going to let you make this decision for yourself, but consider all options."

I nodded. "Thank you, Miss Sherman. I won't let you down." And with that I left the room.

.

**N/A So Miss Sherman thinks Bonnie isn't reaching her full potential, do you agree or not? As always, I ask you to leave a comment. :)**

**Chapter Title:**

**Shine (Acoustic) by Muse**


	10. Good Girls Go Bad

**N/A Hey guys! So this is one of my shortest chapters (yes, I count) so I am personally sorry for that. If you read my other fanfiction Love Me Dangerously then you'd know that these chapters are a huge step-up from the shortness I used to dish out. BUT, thank miracle of miracles, there is plenty of Bamon-y goodness. (: Enjoy and please review! I actually reply, and I am very nice. :D Hugs and kisses! - Simmy**

**Chapter 9**

* * *

Caroline called me as soon as I got home, saying we were going to the mall. I didn't bother to protest, even though I had loads of homework; I needed new clothes and I didn't want to be around Katherine, and she was going to be home from SAT Prep any moment. So, without a moment's hesitation I told Caroline it would be better to go now, and would pick her and Meredith up.

I decided to pick Caroline up first, since she lived closer to me. The ride there was uneventful, my mind was focused on what Miss S had said to me and the strange ride home with Parker.

The whole drive, Parker had been quiet- which was odd enough on it's own- but he wouldn't even look at me. When I called him out on being quiet jokingly he just stared out the window. There was this terrified, nagging feeling in the back of my mind that feared Parker might be past our friendship.

I took a deep breath and shook my head as I turned down the street to Caroline's house. The last thing I needed to do right now was think about the old things that were falling apart right now. Maybe Parker was just having a bad day?

As soon as I pulled up to Caroline's house she was throwing open her door and running down the walk. She opened the passenger door and threw herself in. "Hey," she greeted me breathlessly.

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Why are you in such a rush?" I ask as I continued my drive to Meredith's.

She groaned. "My mother is being a complete pain."

"I can relate; Katherine's been giving me a hard time."

Caroline surprised me by not jumping for the chance to ask why. Instead she reached for the volume and turned it up so that Somebody To Love by Justin Bieber was blasting. "I love this song!" She shouted.

My mind was still on why Caroline had changed the subject when I brought up Katherine, and I wasn't about to be sidetracked. I turned off the radio, "What the hell was that?"

She put on an innocent expression. "Excuse me?"

I gave her a look. "Changing the subject when I brought Katherine up."

She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, tapping her fingers against the tan leather and pressing her lips together.

"Kay, seriously, Caroline, tell me or you're walking back home." We were almost at Meredith's house now.

She sighed. "Well, I don't really have a problem with Katherine. She's always been super nice to me and Meredith." She gave me a look that suggested I was making it up when I said Katherine was uber-bitch.

I scoffed and threw my head back. "You have _got _to be kidding me!" I couldn't believe that Katherine had actually managed to convince my best friends that she was a nice, innocent girl and not the manipulative, heinous demon she actually was.

Caroline remained quiet, looking at me from the corner of her eye while I contemplated how to tell my friends the absolute truth about Katherine without actually right out saying it and making them believe me- because there was no way I was going to let Katherine steal them away. It was the last straw when I thought she might be stealing Riley away the night of my last birthday. Of course, she didn't, but that was because I had fought back. No way in hell was Katherine going to take away my best friends.

Why was she so obsessed with wanting everything I had? My boyfriend, my friends- hell, even my mom. It had to end sometime. But what more could she take away?

My blood ran cold as the thought embedded itself into my mind; she could take the Constance Peace Gala performance away. I didn't know how, or if she had the power, but I was certain if Katherine wanted something she'd find a way to get it.

That's just how manipulative and heinous she is.

After I had picked up Meredith we went to the mall. Shopping with Meredith alone was fine; she was criticizing without being too pushy about it. Shopping with Caroline was a different story; if you had something fabulous then she would have to find something equally fabulous in the store. Now, shopping with both of them was fine; they evened each other out. I made the big decision years ago that it was both of them or by myself.

Shopping with Elena had been as easy as a breeze. We were in tune so we would usually find things for each other, and Elena was never afraid to give strong criticism- she would name off the pros and cons of a dress without being nasty about it. That's why I loved exploring the mall with her.

As always, when we finished shopping we hit up the Booster Juice for some smoothies and then sat at a table and scouted out the hotties, the weirdo's, and the posers. In short; we people watched. It had always been our thing, picking people out and dissecting them. We used to make life-stories about them but then it became too time consuming. So we just opted for picking them out.

"Oh, hottie coming this way." Caroline said under her breath.

Meredith and I instantly looked in the same direction Meredith was and looked for him. "I don't see anyone!" I said, scanning the random people mulling around the mall.

"He's near the Apple store," Meredith said.

Finally my eyes landed on him. "Eh, I rate him 4 out of 10. What about you, Meredith?" I turned to Meredith, who was checking her Blackberry again- like she had been all evening.

She glanced up, and then back down. "Oh, yeah, totally 4."

Caroline and I exchanged a confused glance. "What's so interesting?" I asked, jokingly taking a peek at her Blackberry screen.

She turned it away, her eyes fierce. When she seen mine and Caroline's shocked expressions she smiled unconvincingly. "It's just my mom."

I widened my eyes and looked away, taking a sip of my smoothie.

I didn't expect it, nor had I seen him approach, but suddenly- standing right beside the Booster Juice counter- was Damon Salvatore. Instantly, I dropped my eyes and tried to pretend I hadn't seen him, tried to wish him away, but when I looked up he was still standing there. He gestured me to him with the flick of a finger.

Glancing at Meredith and Caroline I started to rise- they both looked at me. "I'll be right back," I mumbled, then went to Damon. His dark eyes followed me as I approached. "What?" I asked, cringing when I heard my rude tone but deciding he didn't deserve politeness; his actions with Caroline had deserved him rudeness and he should know it.

The side of Damon's mouth quirked up, then fell again as his eyes met mine with the most intense gaze I'd ever received. "I know my brother said some things to you about me, and I just wanted to tell you that's not me anymore. I've been trying to turn my old, big bad ways around but Stefan just won't let me forget about it." His eyes looked utterly sincere, and I felt myself softening a bit.

Something didn't add up though. "But why would Stefan tell me if it wasn't a problem?"

Damon looked flatly mad, he got a dark look on his face- with a touch of humor. "Stefan is vicious and manipulative- he will do anything to get what he wants. He'll say anything, do anything, because he hates me with a burning passion."

He must have seen the scared, bewildered look on my face. He looked sad. "My brother and I aren't always on the best terms."

I dropped my eyes; thinking of Katherine. The sad look in Damon's eyes reminded me of how I had once longed for a tight relationship with my sister- but she never cooperated. It was always tough with her, but once upon a time I would have given anything to have her respect and friendship. "I know what you mean."

"It is my _sincerest _apologies if Stefan scared you. I assure you, nothing happened with myself and Caroline." He gave me a reassuring smile. "She was about to walk 1.5 miles to school and I wanted to help out. Believe me," he looked deep into my eyes, "I would never hurt anyone intentionally."

Looking at him, that dangerous face suddenly became unbearably sweet and earnest- it was hard not to believe that tentative smile. Still- it was such a contrast from his earlier behavior in the football field, and I was ambivalent to make a hard-or-fast decision. I needed some more time to think this through; to figure out if his adorable exterior was nothing more than a joke behind a mask or if he actually said what he meant.

So I smiled, suppressing my greater emotions. "Alright, well I guess I'll see you around."

His hand touched my wrist and a shock ran through me. I yanked it away; in that second his fingertips met the tender skin of my wrist I felt a staggering rush- like I was capable of anything. Like … I was whole.

I gasped and met his eyes, wondering if he had felt it as well. He was looking at me with an apologetic look. "Sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you." His modest eyes showed a twinge of humor.

My heart sank; he hadn't felt the spark between us- but something like that couldn't just be conjured up out of thin air. There was something imperceptible yet completely gratifying between Damon and I and I would stop at nothing until I found a way for him to see that. "It's alright, you didn't scare me ... not really." I added when his eyebrows rose.

He chuckled- what a charming laugh! "I was thinking you could show me some of your cheerleading moves."

I raised an eyebrow- trying to do a rough interpretation of what I thought I would have done a minute ago if Damon hadn't touched me.

"Oh, come off it. Aren't you tired of all of this yet?" Damon smirked devilishly. "We could have such good fun, you and I. _Trust _me." He leaned in, I looked straight into his dark eyes. "Come away with me," he whispered.

For some unfathomable reason, I wanted to please Damon. It wouldn't hurt anyone to just go away with him right now, would it? It would be so easy- so fun! Also, truthfully I was tired of being Queen, and of being around Meredith (who was acting strangely anxious) and Caroline (who was relentlessly predictable). I deserved a night off with Damon.

I looked at him and took a huge breath. "Actually, I am." I marched back to our table and grabbed my purse. Caroline and Meredith looked up, momentarily stunned.

Caroline asked, "Where are you going?"

Meredith laid her hand on my elbow. "We were just talking about going to the movies."

I shook my head, "I have do to something." _Something better than this! _"Don't wait up." And with that I skipped back to Damon and we left the mall. I didn't miss, though, that as we were leaving Damon laid a hand on the small of my back.

Hope wasn't as lost with him as it was with Stefan, I grinned.

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Good Girls Go Bad by Cobra Starship featuring Leighton Meester**


	11. Toxic

**A/N Okay so here's the long anticipated next chapter! I can't stress how sorry I am that it took me so long to update :( But hopefully I still have some dedicated fans. I hope you guys like this and if you're nice about my unofficial abandonment then there might be another one coming later on tonight. (: As always, I'd appreciate it if y'all could leave a little review. Hugs and kisses! - Simmy**

**Chapter 10**

* * *

The day was beginning to wane. Damon had brought me to the one place I was certain I would never go to with a guy like him in all my life. Yet here I was, standing beside Damon as I held the toy gun and pointed at one of the tiny men, trying to get three down to get a prize.

Yes, that's right. We're at a carnival.

Of course I was surprised when we pulled up, Damon had been asking me questions about my past and random things like what my favorite color was. I was about to interrogate him when he parked and then smiled at me.

"We're here." Damon had said.

To my utter amazement, I was having fun. In my sixteen years I had never once had as much fun at a theme park that day. I knew why; because Damon was with me.

He added a spark- made everything wickedly interesting. It honestly would have been the metaphorical cherry on top if I could shoot these stupid toy men.

My last shot, if I got this one I got a prize … Miss. I sighed. "Guess I'm not very good."

The old guy with tattoos manning the booth stepped in front of me behind the counter. "Move aside for others."

Damon stepped up beside me. "Can she just have one more try?"

The man leaned forward over the counter, he was much bigger than Damon. "No can do. You can go to the back of the line now."

Damon smirked down at me and let out a tiny laugh, then looked at the man and his expression suddenly dropped into an intense and slightly angry stare. "I think you can," his voice was low, and dangerous.

My heart pounded against my chest, sure the big man was going to jump over the counter and sucker-punch Damon- but when I looked at the man his expression was neutral. He looked down at me. "Yeah, go ahead; take another shot."

Something didn't add up. It was strange how Damon had convinced the man to let me shoot again with less than 5 words and in such a low tone that hardly implied anything. Surely if the man was as tough as I thought he was, he would have given anyone else the old one-two if they had stood up to him like Damon just had. Instead he was looking at me with an almost dead expression and handing the gun back.

I looked to Damon with a quizzical look, he just smiled at me with glistening white teeth, then switched it off instantly. Something was definitely off about Damon, but like my mother had always told me I should never judge before getting the whole story.

I took a deep breath and then took the gun, aiming it at one of the tiny men and then holding the trigger down. Almost too quickly I let it go and it shot out. When I pulled the toy gun away from my face I was amazed to find I had actually hit one of the tiny men. "Wow." I said, impressed with myself. I held the gun up and blew on the opening. "What's next, sergeant?"

Damon swung his arm around my shoulders. "Anything you want, darling. The world is our playground."

There my heart went again, hammering against my chest. How I hoped he couldn't hear it! I giggled to myself; what an impossible thought. "How about a ride on the Ferris wheel?"

The corner of his mouth quirked up and he looked at the man. "She'll have the kitten."

The man handed me the huge kitten and I raised an eyebrow at Damon. "Why the cat?"

"You remind me of one." He shrugged nonchalantly. "Bonnie, I say we take a pledge to have the most spectacular night of both out lives combined. Agreed?" There was a humorous glint in his dark eyes when he said this, and I couldn't help but feel I was missing out on some cynical joke.

I hugged my kitty close. The look in his eyes was bringing up an antique memory inside me, of old black and white movies when the heroin finally won over the man. The man looked at the heroin the same way Damon was looking at me right now. I hadn't thought about finding true love for a while, but there was something, some lingering emotion, in his dark eyes that was making me feel weird. The feeling wasn't unpleasant, it was … magical, enchanting, fantastic. Maybe if Damon and I got to know each other better then he'd feel that way when I looked at him that way as well? Unless, he already did.

It wouldn't be too weird to bring that up on a first date, right? But is this really even a date? Anyways, I shouldn't be thinking about how I felt with Damon, I had to think about what was happening _right now. _First of all, I had Stefan dangling on the tip of my finger and if I wanted to maintain my rightful spot as Queen of Robert E. Lee I had to make him mine. Also I had a French essay due on Monday, I had to choose my song for the Talent Show, and things with Katherine had to chill or she'd ruin my life.

Yes, I had to wait before getting heavy with Damon. And I had to find out what his problem was. I bit my lip and looked up at Damon through my eyelashes, hiss eyes were now scanning over the crowd of shuffling people.

"Damon-" I began.

He didn't seem to hear me over the park music and babble. He looked at me. "So how about we go for a ride?"

"On the Ferris Wheel?"

He smirked, then grabbed my hand. "Not exactly." Damon looked into my wide brown eyes and whispered some nonsense to me, sending brushes of soft breath from his perfect mouth over my face. I was instantly dazed.

My heart pounded again- I could hear it in my ears. It seemed like my body was trying to tell me this could be dangerous but I didn't care; I was with Damon and he wanted to be here with me. If I couldn't have Stefan then Damon was a solid good choice. He was good-looking and he had this certain air about him that drew me to Stefan in the first place. It was wicked and mysterious- but most of all, sexy and interesting. I needed to know him, I needed to be here with him, I needed to look into those night-black eyes and feel that mysterious, yet completely significant, not at all unpleasant, tug at my heart. I needed this.

Damon pulled me through the masses of people. Random elbows and feet kept jutting out at me so I decided I would stick my elbows out to give the people a taste of their own medicine, most shot me dirty looks and others pretended it didn't happen.

My eyes whipped around, conscious of the fact that Damon was pulling me super fast and my feet could hardly keep up. He wasn't going to the entrance, I realized alarmingly, he was headed to the pitch dark exit by the haunted house. I hadn't realized how dark it had gotten. The moon was high up in the sky by now. How could the time have passed so quickly?

The bright lights of the carnival seemed to pulse out, faces of masked clowns and sinister faces of parents with their children flashed around me. Oh, god. What had I gotten myself into? I hated carnivals, and clowns, and these bright lights were giving me a headache- and why wasn't anyone smiling?

Momentarily, I thought that maybe I should run away- tear my hand away from Damon and make my way toward the actual exit. But his hand gripped mine tightly with a solid iron grip, making it impossible for me to even wiggled my hand around in his. Oh god, please god, don't let him do to me what he did to Caroline!

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Toxic by Britney Spears**


	12. Ain't No Rest for the Wicked

**A/N I love you guys! Thanks for the fabulous reviews (: Here's the next chapter, _bonne oui_? Tell me what you guys think!**

**Chapter 11**

* * *

"Would you like to play a little game?" Damon asked, leaning in and stroking my cheek softly. It was twilight, the most beautiful time of day, as I once said. At this moment it was eerily cold, deadly quiet and there was a pungent smell in the air- like a mix of cotton candy and some odd, horrible, rotting smell.

I knew at once what it was- and it chilled me to the bone; the smell of death. I had read about it once from the books my kooky grandma keeps. The smell of death was one of the most rancid, horrifying smell in the world. Indescribable, that's what it was. I couldn't describe what a terrible smell it was- somehow I just knew.

I shook my head at Damon. "No, I most certainly would _not _like to play a game."

Damon laughed. And even though it was the most appealing laugh I had ever heard, there was a ring to it that made me flinch. It was evil. Utterly evil. "_No? _But that's why we're here, Bonnie!" He was suddenly right in front of me. "Why don't we play a game? C'mon, just _one game!"_

My heart pounded in my chest, I suddenly found myself glued to the ground and completely terrified. I sputtered, "Okay, wha-what's the game?"

Damon smiled that 100-watt smile, it was hard to believe that just a moment ago that same smile had made my heart leap. In that second all I wanted to do was curl up with my mother or be with … with Stefan. _Anyone _who wasn't as evil as Damon. I should have known! I'm so stupid, I thought glumly. I let my baser instincts slide just so I could force myself into believing someone actually cared for me. Now what- was I going to die?

"Just a silly game, that's all." Damon said, his tone suddenly sinister and calm. "Look at me, look _deep _into my eyes. You will not be frightened, you will take every piece of this news with exaggerated kindness and grace. You will _not _run away, and you will _not _repeat what I am about to tell you."

The moment those words came out of his mouth I found that I didn't have a choice, my mindset had already locked down what he was about to say and was obliging without my permission. What was _happening?_

"Ah," Damon said, laying a finger on my slightly parted mouth. "You promise not to repeat, do you? No one likes a parrot."

There was dark humor in his eyes, but I knew he wasn't joking and that he was actually very serious about this.

I nodded, not because he was telling me to, but because it was kind. "I promise."

He smirked, but something was off about it. Almost like he hated what he was doing but didn't have a choice. Damon isn't evil, I suddenly realized, he's just … he's just, what? Just letting go of any inhibitions? He isn't completely evil, he had a bit of good left in him. Everyone does- not matter how small.

"Alright, let's get down to business."

"Why are you telling me?" I asked before I could stop myself, and before he could stop me. "If it's as important as it seems, why tell me?"

He eyed me respectively. "You're smarter than I gave you credit for." He put his hands on my shoulder and looked into my eyes, "Now, listen closely. My brother, Stefan, and I are not human. We are, in fact, _vampires."_

I remained calm, thought somewhere deep inside me I knew I should be freaking out and thrashing at him, maybe running away in terror. But I couldn't, I just stayed put.

"We feed on human blood to sustain- but you knew that didn't you?" He eyed me for a moment, and my breathing stopped. "Hmm, I thought you might have clued in." He smirked, "You are very … hard to read. Not like other humans. Most certainly not." He was almost mumbling to himself.

"Damon?" I asked, finally bringing myself to speak, mustering up the courage. "Are you- are you going to … _feed _on _me?_" I couldn't help the frightened tears that pooled on the brim of my eyes.

Damon looked startled, then he composed himself and flashed a wicked grin. "Only if you want me to?" He looked away, at the bloated full moon hanging in the sky. "I certainly wouldn't mind a little taste … if you want," he added, which confused me.

First Damon was playing a game, not bothering to care if it frightened me, and now he was asking my _permission _to have some of my blood? I was instantly angry. How dare he! What kind of _game _was he playing?"

Damon chuckled grimly. "I can feel your mood changing, your aura pulsing- you're mad." He turned his head and looked me dead-on, his voice dripping with contempt. "Why are you so quick to go from confused to Confucius?"

"Back up a bit!" I said, holding my hands up. "You say you can … feel my mood?" I thought back to earlier in the day when I had been feeling all affectionate. _Oh god._

There was a twinkle in Damon's eyes.

"Can you read my thoughts to?" I asked dryly.

Damon shook his head absently, studying me. "Why aren't you scared of me, Bonnie?"

"You told me not to be," I answered simply. "Does it make you uncomfortable?"

"No," he glowered then advanced, staring into my eyes again with incredible force. "I _need _you to be scared. You are scared of me, aren't you?"

For a moment, terror washed through me but then an even greater emotion took hold and I no longer felt fear. Under Damon's calm, ironical and hard exterior was a boy just as lost and lonely as I am.

_Maybe that's why he told me, _I thought. _He doesn't want to be alone and harbor his secret in solitude anymore._

I looked away from his chilling gaze and leaned into his chest, clutching to cold fabric of his leather jacket. "No. I'm _not _afraid of you."

Damon stiffened and removed me from himself. "Then you are incredibly stupid."

"Damon- don't push me away."

He turned and for a moment I was a kid again- just a little girl- because Damon was looking at me with such unfathomable hatred that I knew I had to live a lot longer to be able to relate to such hate.

Tears rimmed my eyes again, flooding out and they were unstoppable. I had always been soft and knowing someone in Fells Church could hate me _that _much was horrifying and astonishingly hurtful.

"Bonnie-" Damon said, his voice holding a twinge of remorse.

I shook my head and ran away from him- far away. But it didn't matter how far I went- I couldn't escape the pain.

He could have chased me, probably would have caught me, but he didn't try. That was the worst part.

The next day I got ready for school in an anxious haze. It felt like the day would bring surprise and expectations would be met. I know I sound like a bad fortune cookie, but I woke up this morning feeling at peace and better than ever.

Now that I had Damon officially out of my life then I could go back to my initial goal; getting Stefan Salvatore's heart. It would be tough, since he already almost turned me down, but since he agreed to go to the Constance Peace Gala with me then it shouldn't be _too _hard to get him to go on a real date with me.

That morning I called Meredith. We hadn't talked since I ditched her and Caroline at the mall and I thought maybe we could patch things up with a quick donut before school- but there was no answer. I decided to try Caroline- but there was no answer there either.

Sighing, I grabbed my Burberry coat and my Versace bag, heading out the door.

Before I could make it out, though, I was intercepted by Katherine. "Hello," I clipped, trying to step past her.

She smiled vehemently. "Bonnie, my darling sister, let me drive you to school so we can catch up."

"Catch up?" I asked slowly, the words tasted wrong on my tongue concerning Katherine. Last I checked, she hated me. Was this the first step in her Destroy Bonnie's Life Plan or was she finally trying to be a good sister?

The latter seemed more plausible. "Okay," I agreed.

In the car, Katherine turned up a rock song on the radio. I was surprised to recognize it, since it was connected to Katherine's iPod.

"Since when do you listen to Cage The Elephant?" I asked, looking questioningly at her.

She looked shocked. "I always do. This is my favorite."

I looked forward, utterly confused and a tad weirded out. "Mine too …"

She smiled, and I couldn't read her face. "I guess we have more in common than either of us thought."

I nodded.

The car fell silent again, other than the song on the radio which had switched to another song I knew well, when Katherine posed a question. "Mom thought it would be nice for us to spend some time together, alright? _That _is why I'm driving you to school."

I let out a long breath. "Can't say I'm not surprised."

Katherine shrugged. "I would have suspected as much."

Finally, we pulled into the student parking lot. "Do you have to get a ride back with me?" Katherine asked indecently.

I glared and slammed the door to her car. "I'd rather not, thanks."

Just as I was crossing the plaza, though, I tripped over an errant root coming from one of the huge oaks and dropped my purse. All of it's contents- my keys, my lip-gloss and mascara, cell phone, iPod and my script- all came tumbling out.

I groaned and quickly started gathering everything- completely mortified.

To make matters worse, Katherine was standing behind me watching the entire show and I could have sworn I heard her laugh.

"Here, let me help you," A voice said. I looked up to see Stefan kneeling down to help me.

I blushed. "Thanks, but that's not necessary-"

He handed me my script. "Don't fret. It's my pleasure."

I laughed, trying to ease the embarrassment a little. "So do you go around school helping out damsel's in distress?" I joked. But when I looked up at his face I was not expecting his expression.

He looked worried. "You went out with my brother last night."

I dropped my eyes. "Yes."

Then he sighed. "I suppose I can't stop you from seeing him but I advise you to be careful.

I nodded, keeping my eyes down. "Is that all?"

"No," he caught my gaze and smirked. "About the Constance Peace Gala …"

I mentally prepared myself, knowing that the next words out of his mouth were going to sting as if he had squirted lemon juice on my already Stefan-sized cut. Could I handle his rejection?

"… I thought it might be a nice idea to have dinner before, topped with a glass of wine to calm your nerves."

I had to keep the shocked, and somewhat please, expression from creeping onto my face. "Yes!" I said, giving him my brightest smile. "What makes you think I'm nervous?"

His vibrant green eyes raked over my face, reading it. "I know more than you think."

.

**A/N Don't hate Damon _too _much yet (as if that's even possible). Everything will work out for Bamon in the end- a good author always has a few tricks up her sleeve. ;) Stefan acting ominous- good or bad? Hmm ... Maybe it's time for Elena to make her return? Please review!  
**

**.**

**Chapter Title:**

**Ain't No Rest For The Wicked by Cage The Elephant**


	13. Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This

**Chapter 12**

* * *

Bonnie woke to the sound of someone banging on her door. With a groan she rolled out of bed and stumbled toward the light until it flicked on. She found the doorknob and reluctantly opened it. Her mother was standing behind the door; her cheeks flushed pink with a slightly wild look on her face.

"You're not even dressed yet!" She cried out, grabbing Bonnie's hands and leading her toward her closet. "The Constance Peace Gala starts in two hours and you're not even dressed!" Her mother started patting blush onto her face and tugging her curled hair. Suddenly her mother was holding a straightening iron and frying her red hair to a crisp, the end got caught in a tangle and her mother dropped the iron, burning Bonnie's ivory cheek.

"Are you crazy?" Bonnie struggled out of her mother's death grip and fell back in her chair, freeing the iron and throwing it away.

She leaned in over Bonnie, her eyes wide with disbelief. "You're going to fail, Bonnie. You're going to get up on that stage and fail- in front of everyone!" Then she pounced on Bonnie like an animal and started clawing at Bonnie's negligee and face with long fingernails.

"Get off me!" Bonnie screamed, pushing her mother away.

This was too odd, Bonnie realized. Then looked around the room and noticed how everything was kind of glowing, but it didn't look like her room. Something was telling her it was. Bonnie had a horrible feeling.

Then she saw him, standing in a shady corner of her room. Damon. His eyes were grave, his mouth in a straight line. Bonnie first flooded with embarrassment then her eyes clouded with tears. "Damon help me! Please, Damon, please!"

Damon met her eyes and shook his head once, hard and fast. Then he turned gracefully and morphed into the darkness.

Her mom smiled at her, exposing terrifying fangs. "He doesn't want you, Bonnie. He's not going to help." Then her mother started laughing.

Bile rose up in Bonnie's throat and she thrashed around, trying to get out from under her mother. She couldn't breathe!

Then her mother brought her fangs down and tore her throat out, cutting off Bonnie's cries.

I woke up to the annoying beeping of my cell phone. I wiped the sweat off my forehead with the bed sheet and wearily swung my feet over the side of my bed, grabbing my cell phone. There was one new message.

_Can I pick you up this morning for breakfast?_ – Stefan

I rubbed my eyes and pressed my fist against my forehead, trying to squeeze the dream out of my mind. The horrified feeling had stayed with me, the images sticking behind my eyelids.

I stood, throwing my silk robe around me and going to wash my face and brush my teeth. I leaned against the sink, looking into the mirror. My big brown eyes stared back at me. What did my dream mean? Obviously I didn't have feeling for Damon anymore; it had been over five days since his confession at the carnival, over five days since Stefan accepted my invitation to the talent show. Actually, since my evening with Damon, Stefan had barely let me out of his sight. And I'm not exaggerating. Almost every morning he would text me, asking if I wanted to go to breakfast. Then after school he would walk me home or ask me to dinner. It was non-stop.

I was dangerously close to thinking we were in an actual relationship. Being with Stefan was fun and he was very sweet, not to mention cute, but ... but sometimes when I looked at Stefan, I wished I was seeing Damon.

I picked up my cell and texted Stefan back. _Sure, I'll B ready in 15! – _Bonnie

I spent the next ten minutes hastily scrambling around my room, finding everything I needed, and the next four minutes fixing my hair and applying mascara. I threw on a grey blazer I think I wore on the first day of school and a sweet, simple red Nanette Lepore Arabella dress that accentuated my petite waist and flowed out to just above my knees. At last minute I decided to clip on a vintage necklace my mother gave me a few years ago.

Finally, I grabbed my coral Marc by Marc Jacobs bag and slipped on suede Alexander McQueen platform pumps.

As I was leaving my room my phone let out a chime in the tune of Rich Girl by Gwen Stefani. It had been a while since I heard that song, I used to hear it all the time because it was Elena's ringtone-wait ... it still was. Elena was calling me? It had been months since I last talked to her.

I slowly brought the phone to my ear after pressing talk, trying to keep my voice steady. "Hello?"

"Bonnie?" Elena's voice sounded tight. "Please tell me it's you."

At first I started to nod, unable to speak, then responded. "Yes, it's me. What's wrong, Elena?"

She ignored me. "I called at least five different numbers. God, who knew you were so hard to reach?" Her voice was quiet, soft, like she didn't want to be heard.

Elena had messed up my number five different times? What the hell? "What happened, Elena?"

"It's dark where I am right now," She sniffed and there was shouting and breaking of glass in the background. Then someone called her name. "Oh, shit," Elena whispered to herself, her voice breaking. "Bonnie, you have to help me. I didn't know who else to call." Her voice sounded so small, it rose to hysterics and now it really sounded like she was trying to keep quiet.

"Elena, what are you talking about? Help you how?" I leaned against the banister, clutching the phone tightly against my ear. Her earlier words echoed in my head, _It's dark where I am right now- _could there be a double meaning? "Elena?"

The line went dead.

My hand shook as I took the phone away from my ear. The number was blocked. There was no way to reach her again, no way to help.

Suddenly it felt like last year when Michael went missing. Matt and I had no way to contact him, no idea which way he had gone or where he would go. She had the same feeling of helplessness.

I heard a knock on my front door and numbly went to answer it. Stefan stood behind the white door, his hands in his back pockets, looking calm and cool. His eyebrows pinched together when he saw the look on my face. He looked all around the door frame and ... sniffed the air? No, that couldn't be right. But he did seem to think something was off.

"Are you alright?" His eyes returned to me, giving me a once-over.

I nodded, crossing my arms over my chest. "I just got off the phone with a friend ... There was something wrong ..." I bit my lip and watched as Stefan relaxed slightly. "What did you think happened?" I blurted, Damon flashed before my eyes.

Stefan shrugged tightly. "I thought maybe someone came in uninvited."

"Uh, no," I reached to pull my purse tighter up my shoulder but it wasn't there. I sighed and glanced up to my room. I must have forgotten it. I looked back to Stefan. "Sorry, I forgot my purse upstairs. If you want to come-"

"No," Stefan said harshly, then seemed to correct himself. "You won't take too long, I'll just wait here."

Warily, I climbed back up the stairs. A tiny voice in the back of my mind wondered how long it would be before Stefan actually confessed to me that he was a vampire. Damon told me without a problem, but Stefan seemed to want to keep me in the dark forever. I know I should be frightened but I totally wasn't for some reason. I would tell Stefan that I knew but for some reason I wanted to hear it from him, I wanted him to trust me enough. I needed him to let me into his life.

Or I would be pulled into Damon's.

.

**A/N Hope you guys liked this chapter, especially after the long wait! Okay, so, _Elena_'s finally made an 'appearance'. Good or bad- or both? :O Please review! XOXOOO**

**Chapter Title:**

**Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) from the Sucker Punch Soundtrack**


	14. It Is What It Is

**Chapter 13**

* * *

It was unusually hot outside, and the itchy tag labelled Smythe on my blazer was scratching uncomfortably against my neck. I took it off and threw it into Stefan's car, then turned toward him with a faint smile on my face. "Okay, we can go now."

As we were walking away, Stefan took my hand and pulled me closer to him. A shock ran through me, and I tried to enjoy it. And I did, at times. Like when we passed someone from school and their face showed jealousy.

I knew at once that I proved I deserved to be Queen; I had done what my friends and I had set out to do when I first came back. But something felt wrong about it; my heart didn't pitter-patter, I didn't feel more complete. It just felt ... normal. Almost like I was just holding hands with a friend, and not someone I could love.

After we grabbed a donut, Stefan led me to a bench over-looking the town square. I let go of his hand willingly and wiped the sweat off onto the tough material of my dress. I found myself wishing I had worn something lighter.

I felt Stefan's eyes on me suddenly. "What?"

"I just ... noticed how pretty you look in the sunlight."

I dropped my eyes, taking a small bite of my donut.

Stefan leaned back, looking rejected, "My deepest apologies for making you uncomfortable."

I touched his hand, "No, no, it's not that. It's just ..." I sighed and met his eyes. I didn't want to lead him on, but I couldn't say what I was really feeling without jeopardizing my relationship with him. I wanted to with all my heart, but my cool factor was pretty much being held up because of him. My hands were tied.

I smiled at him. "Can we just take this slow?"

He smirked, but it didn't reach his eyes, "Of course." Then he leaned in, and planted a soft kiss on my cheek. Stefan leaned back and his eyes dropped to my neck, showing confusion. He reached up and touched something there. I looked down and saw my necklace.

"My mother gave it to me after my grandma died, it's supposed to be a family heirloom or something," I mumbled, not seeing the big deal. His mouth formed an 'o'. "What is it?" I snapped.

"This," his throat was dry, and he swallowed hard. "This is a very remarkable piece of history. Keep it safe," Stefan's eyes locked with mine, they were dead serious. "Wear it at all times."

When I got to school the student body was buzzing with news about Stefan and me. The Ladies in Waiting gushed all lunch hour about how cute we are together. Caroline and Meredith couldn't get enough 'juicy' details. I felt like I was a living lie.

Finally, last bell sounded and I tried to catch up with Caroline. "Hey, Care, wait up!" I called.

Her shiny auburn head of hair bounced along quickly, almost _trying_ to ignore me.

"Caroline!" I shouted again. Several heads turned in my direction but I ignored them. Huffing, I finally came to her side and pulled her to a stop. "I was calling you!"

Her dark green eyes darted around, avoiding mine. "Oh."

I squinted. "What's up with you lately?"

She shrugged.

That's when I lost it. All the rejection and hurt I'd felt that month came out as anger, finally spilling over the edge. "Why does it feel like everyone's hiding things lately? You, Meredith, Parker, and even Dam—my damn sister," I saved myself last minute from mentioning Damon. "I'm sick of it. No more secrets, alright? Just tell me what's on your mind right now. _Please_."

Caroline bit her lip then sighed. "Alright, I'm sorry, Bonnie. Okay, so ..." Caroline smirked, "I shouldn't have even kept it from you, it was stupid." She held her head high and tossed her hair back, "Damon and I have been seeing each other, it's pretty serious but we want to keep everything on the DL."

I tried to contain my shock, tried to stop the agonizing feeling that tore through my heart, because, really, what sense did it make? After what happened at the carnival I shouldn't even care about him.

Then it struck me, did Caroline know about the Salvatore brothers' secret? I studied her expression; slightly boastful with a hint of superiority. It didn't _look _like she knew; would it be so bad if she did?

Yes, yes it would, I thought. Caroline was _not _capable of keeping a long-term secret.

Caroline was waiting for me to say something. I smiled, trying to keep the reproachful look off my face. "That's great, Care! Why didn't you tell me?"

She shrugged. "We don't want to tell the whole world just yet, he said there are some things he needs to tell me first," her eyes shined. "I'm going to ask him to come with me to the talent show."

I was about to answer, we both heard commotion outside. I pushed through the big door of Robert E. Lee and looked around. A red Ferrari was parked on the curb of the street, a herd of students forming a semi-circle around it, admiring. Leaning against the stunning car was none other than handsome, dangerous Damon Salvatore.

My heart did a little dance that I tried to ignore. Caroline brushed past me, looking fierce and deity-like. "Wow," she breathed and looked at me over her shoulder. "He sure knows how to make an entrance."

I nodded absently, trying to catch his eyes, hidden behind dark sunglasses.

He took them off, tucking them into the collar of his tight black shirt. He wasn't wearing his leather jacket and his arms looked absolutely delectable. Finally his eyes met mine and he gestured me forward with two flicks of his finger. A smile spread across my face and I stepped forward-

-at the same time as Caroline. She skipped down the stairs and flew into his strong arms, planting a big kiss on his lips. The flock of students cheered and whooped, a pack of jocks made disgusting smacking noises. Finally they tore apart and Damon held the passenger door open for Caroline. She jumped in and sat there with a haughty look on her face.

That was when I noticed Stefan standing beside me. I jumped at the sight of him, and laid a hand on my heart. "You surprised me. Do you always sneak up on people like that?" I studied him, mentally adding eerily quiet to my list of Things Vampires Can Do.

His eyes were on his brothers' performance, but then they fell on me. "Can I walk you home?"

I was prepared to decline but then decided against it. Everyone would see us (including Damon) and why not have some fun? I smiled up at Stefan, then grabbed his gorgeous head of hair and stood up on toes to reach his lips.

His shock was clear but, thankfully, he didn't pull away and embarrass me in front of everybody. Instead, he put his hand on my back, his other hand going to my hair, and pulled me closer to him. I sensed eyes trained on us but tried to keep the act up believably. I smiled against his lips, trying to look like I was enjoying it and not like I was trying to upstage my best friend and her new 'boyfriend'. Finally I had to come up for air, and when I did I kept my hand pressed against his cheek, staring into his vibrant green eyes that were hazy with desire.

For a moment, everything in the plaza was silent, I was afraid everyone had continued on with their after-school rituals. Then I heard the start of an engine, and the sharp squeal of tires.

When I looked, the red Ferrari was just visible exiting the parking lot. The rest of the student body almost looked stunned then Parker was standing there, his face unreadable. But he didn't look like the same Parker I used to know, his face was covered in a sheen of sweat and his eyes were hard when they met mine. Then his jaw clenched and he turned his back on me, cutting into the forest at the edge of the plaza.

Instantly, without knowing why, I knew I'd made some sort of mistake. I took Stefan's hand and clutched it tightly as I combed through the crowd toward his car. A murmur fell through the crowd, mostly confusion over what happened.

All the gushing over the happy new couple was diminished.

Stefan drove me home, the car was quiet. I know we were both wondering what the hell happened. Finally he pulled up in front of my house and I unbuckled my seat belt and reached for the door handle, but before I left he stopped me.

"What happened back there?"

I stayed clutching the handle. "What do you mean?"

"Please tell me you didn't kiss me to anger my brother."

I whipped around. "So what if I did?"

"So you were just using me?"

That stopped me. His words sunk in and I instantly felt shame. I averted my eyes, trying not to meet his harsh gaze. "I'm so sorry, Stefan," I whispered, then jumped out of his car and slammed the door, running as fast as I could and throwing my door open. I stayed watching him from the window until he slowly started up his car again and drove away.

My heart sunk and I felt horrible. I didn't want to lead him on, but I did anyway. And what did Damon really mean to me? I clearly didn't mean anything to him, so why did I let him destroy my relationship with Stefan. It was all so pointless.

I felt my eyes fill with tears. For the first time since entering my home I noticed how quiet it was. I had no idea where my parents or Katherine were, and I didn't really mind. My parents would just ask questions and Katherine would be sickeningly happy to see me so miserable.

I let my feet carry me up to my room, where I left the light off and stripped myself of the thick red dress and tall blue heels and threw on some old flannel pyjamas that did nothing for my hour glass figure. At last minute, I decided to leave the antique necklace on.

I had just tied my hair up when I faced my room and noticed the dark figure sitting still on my bed.

My heart lurched and a scream got caught in my throat. I stumbled back toward the light switch, keeping my eyes on the silhouette. Finally the light clicked on and I gasped.

Perching daintily on my bed, with mascara in streaks running down her face, was Elena Gilbert.

.

**A/N Hey guys! Surprised I'm updating so soon? So am I! But let's both be happy because this is probably the first (and last) time this is ever going to happen. :P So, what did you guys think of this chapter? I always like hearing from you guys so please feel free to leave a review or message me! :) Love you guys and thanks for the reviews so far! Are you surprised to see Elena? We all know there can't be a drama-filled story without our favorite little trouble-maker. :) **

**Hugs and kisses! - Simmy  
**

**Chapter Title:**

**It Is What It Is by Lifehouse**


	15. Believe Me I'm Lying

**A/N Thanks for all the fabulous reviews guys! I love you all for being such dedicated fans, the people who've stayed with me since day one, and I promise you will never see the twist coming up. :) I promise it'll be extra juicy.**

**Also a big thanks to my fabulous x 2 Beta, Penny Nickel! **

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it, and please take a moment to leave a comment! I like good _and_ bad reviews (Although the bad make me cry... :P) Enjoy reading, folks! BTW, I'm having funny Parker with-drawls, aren't you guys? Who wants a little more Parker? XOXO - Simmy  
**

**Chapter 14**

* * *

The second it sunk in that Elena was actually here, on my _bed, _I instantly knew something was wrong.

Elena wouldn't run away, she was stronger than that. But obviously she had run away- so things must have been terrible.

My bedspread was pulled around her; she was clawing into the fabric with dirty fingernails. Her face was a wild mess of smeared mascara and pink lipstick. Underneath the messed makeup, her skin was as pale as a calla lily. She seemed weightless, even when she was sitting, and when I stepped closer I realized why; her collar bone was very prominent and her shoulders stuck out. She was all skin and bones.

"Oh, Elena ..."

"I-I didn't know ... where else to go," Her voice was thick with tears, and a little rough.

I slowly went to sit beside her, lowering myself gently onto the bed. For some reason I felt if I moved too quickly I'd scare her away, like a rabbit.

"What happened?"

Elena shrugged, her bones jutting out. "I don't want to talk about it right now."

"You have to, Elena. You just have to." My stomach was turning at the sight of her. I wanted to run her a hot bath and give her a good meal, maybe a change of clothes, since all she had on was a dirt-smeared slip, but something inside me forced me to stay with her.

"What happened?" My voice was harder.

"It's Robert." Elena started shaking. "He started sneaking into my room again. It got so bad I just-" she clenched her teeth-hard- and dug her nails into the bed, "I just _couldn't take it_ anymore."

For some reason I felt scared of her- not _for _her. Something about her feral expression gave me the chills.

"I got out of there as fast as I could, took the first bus to Annandale then hitchhiked the rest of the way."

It took me a moment to process this. "Wait-you _walked _here? Annandale's at least 4 hours away!"

"There were no buses coming here or anywhere closer, _Bonnie_. What was I supposed to do? Stay in the house on haunted hill till I went mad?"

By the look on Elena's face, she already wads crazy.

Elena raked her fingers roughly through her now dirty blond hair, and then turned her head slowly, precisely, to face me. "I need you to keep me here."

I nodded vigorously, "Of course, Elena. I mean, after all you've been through there's no way I could say no-"

"I also demand that you leave me a secret."

I paused, my tongue feeling thick in my mouth. "Why? Did you ... so something ... illegal back in Pennsylvania?"

Her wide blue eyes glared at me. "No, you idiot; so the police don't find me here when Aunt Judith files the report. I _can't _go back there."

"Okay, okay," I said quickly, holding my hands up, trying to annihilate any previous feeling I had about her being bad. Sure, she had a vendetta against Robert but that didn't mean she hurt him ... did it? She ran away, after all.

"I can see the gears turning in your brain, Bon Bon. But I didn't do anything bad. Promise," she said dryly.

Who did she think she was? I understand that her life has been more than rough since moving away but did she really have to come into my house and insult me? I would accommodate her either way, but it would have been a bit better, on my part, after the day I've had, if she would try and be a tad nicer.

She leaned back, as if sensing my bad mood. "What happened?"

Elena could always perceive when something was wrong.

I let out a shallow breath. "There's this guy-"

"It always starts with a guy," Elena said knowingly.

"Well, there are actually _two _guys," I corrected myself. "I only really have feelings for one," the second I said this I knew it wasn't right. Something felt wrong about the declaration. "Well, I don't really ... I mean, they're both really ... It's complicated," I finished lamely

Elena was watching me, speculating. "I see."

I was going to answer, but Elena's makeup was still messy, and it was hard to concentrate on anything else.

I laid my hand on hers, remembering when we were best friends and took care of each other, trying to forget my moment of confusion over the brother's. "How about I tell you over a meal, maybe after you've cleaned yourself up a bit?"

Her eyes shone past the mascara gunk. "That would be fantastic."

Then her eyes watered. "I know I'm being _so _bipolar right now. I'm just ... I _guess_ I'm just still in shock." She bowed her head, her face screwed up in anguish. "I actually started ... to trust Robert again. He said it would be over soon," her voice rose to hysteria at the end.

I wrapped my arms around her, trying to ignore her pronounced ribcage against mine and her shoulder blades sticking out.

She trembled until she dried herself out, then she leaned back and looked out my window. "I think ... I'm ready for that shower now."

I nodded and stood, already thinking about which PJ's I'd stick her in - when something hard and solid hit my window.

My wide brown eyes flickered to Elena then back to the window. Slowly, I approached it, raising a hand to Elena to tell her to stay back. My eyes landed on a dark figure below.

Hastily, I lifted my window and stuck my head out.

Damon was standing below, his hand full of small, white stones, and his face full of excitement.

Mine, on the other hand, was panicked. What did _Damon_ want? Where was I going to hide Elena if he wanted to come up? Should I let him up?

"How do you know where I live?" I shouted down at him.

He shrugged. "A little birdie told me. Can I come up?"

Shit! I cursed internally. Now what? I wished I could turn around and ask Elena, but wouldn't he find that a bit bizarre seeing as I was supposed to be without company?

I decided to take coward's way out; not give an explanation.

"Uhm ... no, actually. You really can't."

Damon smirked. "I thought you might say that. This is why ... I'm not going to wait for your invitation."

He started toward the wall just below my window.

"Wait, wait!" I rushed out, holding my hands out. "That is _totally _unnecessary."

"So you're going to invite me in?"

I scoffed, "No."

"Then you leave me no other choice, Madame."

"My room is a complete mess!" I spat, and then bit my lip. God, I couldn't have thought of anything else? "Why don't I just come down?"

His eyes flashed; suddenly his expression was something that resembled hurt. "Is this because of my little confession the other night?"

I cleared my throat, fighting the urge to cast a glance over my shoulder, to make sure Elena wasn't standing _right there. _"What?"

His eyebrow furrowed. "About my being a vamp-"

"Okay, come in!" I shouted before I could stop myself.

Somehow, Elena hiding under my bed (with dust bunnies and possibly spiders) sounded a whole lot better than Elena finding out Damon was a vampire (and running through towns square screaming).

He smirked devilishly and dropped down, his muscles bunching up like a great cat, and then he sprang up and landed on my window sill. "Surprise," he whispered, almost against my lips.

We both heard the sound of the shower starting.

Damon turned to me. "You have company?"

I shrugged, acting nonchalant and racking my brain. "It's just ... Meredith."

"Right." He didn't sound convinced.

I had to take a look around my room to make sure Elena was really in the shower and not just hanging somewhere. When I turned back to Damon his eyebrows were raised.

I tried to pretend I had just been doing nothing and sat down on my bed, smoothing out the comforter. "So ... What's up?"

His livid eyes stayed with me as he moved onto my bed and sat very close to me. Damon leaned forward and brushed a lock of red hair out from my eyes. His touch was as light as a feather. I could almost feel his breath on my lips.

"Are you ... trying to ... seduce me?" I whispered, my words floating apart as Damon's capable fingers brushed my collar bone, lightly tracing my jugular.

"Now that's not very professional, Bonnie," Damon whispered, bending down and pressing his perfect, soft, pink lips against the base of my throat. "I'm merely here to ask you a simple, valuable question."

"Simple and valuable?" I asked, not feeling very coherent.

"Oh, yes."

I felt his tongue lightly brush my throat, suppressing the moan that tried fighting its way out. I felt like grabbing his gorgeous head of hair and laying one on him, but I wasn't being very logical.

Damon's lips crawled up my throat, pausing at my jaw-line. I closed my eyes, slowly giving into the pleasure.

Then, surprisingly, a face popped up behind my eyelids; Stefan's. Was I cheating on him? Technically, we aren't in a romantic relationship; we never discussed anything serious. But it was still wrong. In my current state, I was proud for realizing this.

With all my might, I pushed against his hard chest, startling him. "What did you want to ask? We have a limited amount of time," my eyes went to the door of my bathroom suggestively.

He stared longingly at my lips, tipping his head from side to side. I forced my eyes to stop straying to his lips and focus on his eyes.

"What's your question?" I pressed.

Damon ran a hand softly over my hair. "Why are you with my brother?"

I stood up, instantly aggravated. "Unbelievable."

"What?"

I turned back to him, trying to convey my full anger through my eyes. "You honestly don't get it, do you?"

"Don't get what?" He laid himself out on my bed.

I jutted my chin out, wanting to tell him that I was only with Stefan for my stupid throne, that I only kissed Stefan to make him jealous, that I hated myself for having feelings for Damon. But I couldn't- not if it would give Damon _more _power over me.

So I decided on lying: Since it always worked _oh so well. _

I crossed my arms, trying to make my voice fervent and believable. "I'm with Stefan because ... because he's not you."

Damon noticeable stiffened, but his mouth stayed in a tight smirk.

"He's not ambivalent, he's honest and trustworthy. The more time I spend with Stefan the more I come to like myself as a person." Lies, all lies. I was lying to Damon. "He'd never hurt me or make me feel uncomfortable. And even though he hasn't told me your secret, I know it's only because he doesn't want me getting mixed up in your world."

Oh, god, make it stop! It was all tumbling out. These are the things I wanted to say to Stefan _about _Damon- not the other way around. "He lays all of his feelings out on the table," I said slowly, my voice wearing thin at the look in Damon's eyes. "So ... I know what I'm dealing with."

Suddenly Damon leapt up from my bed and disappeared. I thought he was gone. Suddenly I felt a whisper of breath against my neck- then a hard hand coming down on my shoulder.

"No, sweet, little Bonnie," Damon's soft yet angry voice hissed against my neck. "You have _no idea _what you're dealing with."

The hand melted away, and when I whipped around the darkness had taken Damon with it.

Elena came out of the bathroom shortly after. I gave her some clothes to wear then climbed into bed and pretended to sleep.

When I knew Elena was sleeping, I let the tears fall. Internally, I hated myself. The torturous thoughts came and didn't stop all night_. Damon hates me, Damon wants to kill me. I shouldn't have lied. _

_Damon will never love me, now._

_._

**Chapter Title:**

**Believe Me I'm Lying by Forever The Sickest Kids**_  
_


	16. Check Yes Juliet

**Chapter 15**

* * *

"Bonnie McCullough, we need you in fitting!"

A bland assistant, with a wire sticking out of her ear, who was always attached to her clipboard, called to me. Her light brown, unkempt hair was pulled back in a plain, thin black headband. She wore dark plaid flannel Hinge shorts over opaque tights, paired with a tight white button-down. "We _do _have a schedule, Bonnie."

I rolled my eyes and exchanged a dry look with Caroline, who had just finished sticking her arms into gossamer wings.

Caroline caught my look and gave her a quick wink before cattily saying: "God, can someone call the up-tight police?" Caroline didn't bother lowering her voice, earning a giggle from the underclassmen.

I giggled along too, and then blew a quick kiss to Caroline before tromping over to the fitting room. Today I was getting fit for my Juliet costume (Yes, I got the part!) and finding out who my Romeo was. I had my suspicions it was Tyler Smallwood, who _always _sucked up to Miss S.

"Arms out," the assistant told me, sending a cloud of coffee breath straight at my face.

I tried not to gag and stuck my arms out dutifully.

My mind drifted off, thinking about the night before, and the two unexpected guests that had visited me. I still couldn't believe that Damon had seen me in hideous flannel pyjamas, and it hadn't occurred to me at the time to care. I couldn't fully believe a lot of things that were happening right now. For one, that I was harbouring a possible fugitive, which was illegal times ten, and also that I had completely lied to Damon about _everything _and possibly ruined my relationship with him.

I was ruining a lot of things.

About halfway through the assistant huffed, pulling on the hem of her turtleneck, and snapped at me to relax. I restrained myself from blurting the same to her.

About around the time she was measuring the length of my arms, someone knocked on the door.

Caroline stuck her shiny auburn head in, with a secretive smile on her face. She seemed to have shed the gossamer wings and now had on a peasant hat.

"Sorry to bother you, but your Romeo is being announced. Miss Sherman wanted me to come get you."

I breathed a sigh of relief and mock-curtseyed for the assistant, scoring another huff, and left the room.

Sure enough, when I got to the stage, everyone was surrounding Miss S, either sitting on a random chair or standing. I perched on the step of a ladder, trying to ignore a few curious glances shot my way- including a few not-so-friendly looks from Parker.

God, what was up _his _butt lately, anyway? It made zero sense.

Miss S was walking- no, _pacing _–back and forth in front of us. When she finally came to a stop, it was for the steaming coffee her assistant was handing her. She looked up at all of us with fierce eyes, her lips pursed.

"Good morning, class."

"Good morning," we all chorused.

"I believe you're all here to find out who will play Romeo in our play this year," she didn't wait for us to respond. "There's been a slight change that I hope you will all take with good grace."

A murmur went through the students; I waited, impatiently, for more.

"I have decided to add a sort of a twist to the classical Romeo and Juliet play where Juliet finds herself in a sort of a pickle," her eyes find mine. Miss S sounds exhausted, and for a moment I think maybe this isn't Miss Sherman's idea. "In my version, Juliet is going to fall for Romeo, but have more of an attraction towards Paris."

Dead silence. I was pretty sure we were all wondering the same thing: _Whaaaat?_

Juliet is going to fall in love with Romeo ... but have more of an attraction to Paris? This makes no sense to me.

"What will this mean, Miss Sherman?" I ask, my voice sounding very controlled compared to the turmoil inside me. My eyes flash once to Parker, but his face is turned away from me.

"Well, it will mean all new scripts, for one thing. Claudia will pass those out shortly," Miss S snaps her fingers and the up-tight assistant appears with her arms full of scripts.

An annoyed murmur goes through the flock of students. Caroline, who looks beyond pissed, whips out her cell phone and her fingers fly angrily over the keys.

"And there will be two male leads," Miss Sherman continues, interrupting complaints. "One playing Romeo and the other, playing Paris."

"So ... who's going to play them?" Tyler asks, looking like someone just pulled the rug out from under him. "Have you made the decision?"

She takes a long pull of her black coffee, then says in a '_Who do you think I am?' _sort of way. "Yes, Tyler, I have most certainly made the decision." She then consults her clip board for what seems like an eternity. "As you all know, Bonnie McCullough will be playing Juliet Capulet.

"Tyler, you will play Romeo Montague; and Count Paris will be played by none other than our talented Mister Parker Belmont."

I have to take a moment to process this as everyone congratulates the boys. My eyes are on Parker as he puts away his beat up Kin One cell phone and accepts an awkward high five from Caroline.

I'm going to have to spend almost every night, _and _weekends, to a guy who seemingly hates me- and I don't even know how to make it right (hell, I don't even know what _caused_ him to hate me so much).

I push the thought out of my mind, taking deep yoga-style breaths. Fight one battle at a time, Bonnie, I tell myself.

I raise my hand. "Miss S, can I speak with you alone for a second?"

She nods and I pull her off to the side, away from hearing distance.

"I'm afraid I don't understand the new concept."

Miss S is quiet for a moment, and I realize she's waiting for me to continue.

"You see, I don't get how Juliet is supposed to be in love with Romeo, yet so attracted to Paris."

"What is so complex about it that you don't understand?" Miss S says slowly.

"Well ..." I assemble my thoughts. "You see, love is unbreakable, you can't just go and like someone if you're madly in love with someone else."

Miss S has this odd expression on her face that is a cross between amusement and fatigue. "Bonnie, why don't you come back, make the same argument when you've felt love?"

I'm so stunned that I don't even respond; Miss S just walks away and calls everyone to order again. I numbly go back to my seat, trying not to hate Miss S too much. I mean, she couldn't have known that love was a soft spot for me; she's just being her usual, straight-forward self. No need to be sensitive.

But that didn't make me feel any better, even after Miss S smiles gently at me, as an unspoken apology. I'm horribly inexperienced, not even capable of making a valid argument because of how inept I am. What's wrong with me that nobody loves me?

I can tell Caroline is aggravated that I'm not laughing at her patronizing of Claudia, but Miss S's words are still echoing in my ears and all I can do is smirk half-heartedly.

Finally, Caroline stands up and glares at me over her shoulder. "You're being so lame, Bonnie McCullough."

I flinch. She struts away and sidles up next to Tyler Smallwood.

Suddenly there's a big hand settling on my back, it's warm and makes me feel a bit better, even before I look up and see it's Parker.

His blue eyes are wonderfully unclouded and he looks more alert than I think I've ever seen him. I've never admitted this, but his constant drug use really made me worry. The last time I saw him, his eyes were clear too, so maybe he's kicked this bad habit.

"How are you faring, doll face?" Parker asks in his usual drawl.

I smiled ruefully. "I've had better days."

"You're telling me." He smiled a crooked smile, dropping gracefully onto a chair beside my ladder seat. "Mayhaps we ought to dolly on over for some ice cream thereafter this lump of a rehearsal?"

I had to laugh at his improv-Shakespeare talk.

Parker looked down at me, his smile completely genuine, and his face void of any vexation toward me. "What do you say, doll face?"

I shrug, "Why not?" Hanging out with Parker, eating ice cream at the park and enjoying each other's company- just like old times. The thought makes me smile.

Just as I take Parker's hand to stand- a high-pitched scream stops everyone in their tracks.

The source of the scream is Caroline. Her cat-like green eyes bulge as she looks over her HTC HD7 phone. Tyler Smallwood is so shocked he jumps and takes a step away from her. The underclassmen are exchanging panicked looks. Miss S turns surprise and almost drops her clipboard.

Finally Caroline stops screaming, but her mouth is still hanging open. To my utter astonishment her eyes snap towards me and her lips pull back in malevolence.

"You!" She snarls. "Little Miss Perfect, has to have everything, doesn't she? DOESN'T SHE?" Caroline shrieks.

Then Caroline stood up angrily and marched toward me, stomping without falling in her 4-inch wedges.

"You're such a whore!" Caroline screams in my face.

I'm frozen in shock, I all I can do is stare at the picture when Caroline holds her phone in front of my face.

There, in the picture displayed on her touch screen, is a picture of Damon and me. I'm cradling his head, fists gripping dark hair, and leaning my head back in pleasure. The picture must have been taken outside my window, just before I pulled away. You can't see his face, which is pressed against my chest, but you can tell it's Damon from the Italian clothing to the fine dark head of hair. The expression on my face is the worst of all though; sensual, erotic, like I'm enjoying every minute of it, not at all like I want to end what was happening.

I can't see the look on Caroline's face anymore, or hear the insults she's hurling at me. It's all I can do to not swipe the phone from her hand and smash it against the ladder.

Miss Sherman is trying to calm Caroline down but she won't hear it.

Beside me, Parker has gone very still; I can almost hear the judgment crumbling off him.

Finally, I can't sit here anymore. I push past Caroline, who I'm lucky hasn't strangled me to death, and fight to keep a sense of balance as I bang through the exit door and fall against the wall there.

I try to sort through what happened but my mind seemed to have gone into hibernation because I'm drawing a blank.

All I can think is: _Oh god! _Who_ sent Caroline that picture? Who else was there, other than the obvious and Elena? _

I hold my head in my hands and will myself not to cry.

Then a mildly sarcastic voice calls out, "Well, well ... Guess we're not all perfect." Parker is there, comforting me.

I didn't hear him come out, but I don't even have enough suspicion left in me to care. All I care about is the fact that Parker is here beside me, and that he isn't repulsed enough to not hold me.

Suddenly I'm bawling, spewing out words like '_Idiot' _and '_Mistake'. _When I've sufficiently ruined Parker's faded blue button-down, I pull away and wipe my face, which is probably red and blotchy from crying.

I let out a muffled laugh.

"What?" Parker asks.

I turn away and shield my face, inconspicuously wiping under my eyes to make sure there's no running mascara. "I probably seem crazy."

I can feel Parker shrug. "We all have our days."

"Mine seem to come more often," my voice cracks.

Parker nudges my shoulder and I turn back to him with a sigh, his face is expectant.

"Nothing's going on between Damon and me," I explain. "He just came over that night and ... took me by surprise. I ... Damon and me ... There's nothing going on," I finish lamely.

There's only a slight flare of judgment in Parker's eyes- or is it something else?

Suddenly, there's nothing I want more than to make him see my side- the _truth. _It's not a want, but a pure _need. _

"Don't be mad, okay?" I whisper, grabbing one of his surprisingly big hands and holding it in both of mine tightly. "I couldn't ... stand it if you were ... if you were mad at me again," my voice cracks again.

Damn my stupid human emotions.

"C'mere," Parker answers softly, pulling me into his arms.

For a while, we just sit there, holding each other. It feels good. Back when our parents were still together and fighting constantly, all I had was Parker, and vice versa. It felt nice to be getting back to that. When I pulled away, Parker and I's faces were inches apart.

"How are you faring?" I imitated him, saying his earlier words lightly.

He leans in closer till our noses are touching, the sensation of being closer with him surprisingly ... normal.

Parker smiles airily. "Like a million bucks."

When his lips meet mine, I don't protest. It had been a while since I kissed a boy (not including the time I kissed Stefan in the parking lot to make Damon jealous, because, honestly, who was I kidding?) and this felt exceptionally satisfying. It wasn't the whole heart-dropping-to-your-knees, spine-tingling stuff of great romance, but it made my heart squeeze a little. It made me want more.

After a long period of time, I have to pull away for air. As soon as we break away, I can tell this has added a spark to Parker's notoriously good mood.

He's smiling a wide, brilliant smile like he just won a million bucks and he leans back as if proud of himself.

The corner's of my mouth perk up. "Want to give me a ride home?"

"Depends ... will I be staying?" His eyebrows wiggle a little, and then he starts shaking with laughter at my blush.

Parker walks me to his rusty old sedan and holds open the door for me.

I should have kissed Parker sooner, I think idly. Then, at least, he would have treated me like a lady before and not some sister-figure.

Then, for some strange reason, I'm crushed by sudden guilt. Suddenly I remember why I had to stop with Damon.

Oh no ... _Stefan. _Sweet, charming Stefan. Did he still think we were in a relationship? _Were_ we? I haven't even talked to him since the whole kissing/make-Damon-jealous debacle, yet here I was kissing the first guy I could lay my hands on.

I'm so upset with myself that I can only barely joke with Parker on the way to my house. By the time we pull into my driveway I've just about had it with his immature jibes that I'm about to slam my front door in his face when I catch sight of his expression.

Humiliated, crushed, it almost astounds me that I didn't notice it before.

I grab his arm just as he's turning away. "Hey, what's wrong?"

He sighs and shakes his head, keeping it bowed. "It's nothing, Bonnie."

"Yeah? Well, I'm not buying it." I poke his side humorously. "Seriously, Parker, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's _wrong_ ... it's just ... I thought you enjoyed our kiss as much as I had, that's all."

I feel this strange pain in my heart and abruptly all I want to do is wrap my arms around him. "Oh, no, Parker! No, you've got it all wrong! You see, I haven't ended things with Stefan yet, so it just feels ... immoral."

He looks up at me, testing. "Are you sure?"

I step forward, tossing my arms around his neck and stretching up on my tip-toes. "Absolutely," then I lay my lips on his softly. "Are we good?"

Parker nods, smiling almost ruefully. "Of course, my fair Juliet. Thou have a lovely night!"

"Why thank you, Count Paris," I giggle and watch Parker leave. Strange, how quickly things could change in one afternoon.

When I get to the foot of the stairs I can hear faint music coming from my room. I see my mom just entering the kitchen. She probably knows I'm home now, in about five minutes she'll invite me to dinner. Will it be too suspicious to take enough for two and head up to my room?

I decide to run up and check on Elena before making any drastic decisions.

Sure enough, Elena has We The Kings basically blasting on my Apple laptop and is dancing around.

I go to turn it down then whirl around to face her. She's wearing a skimpy camisole and silk shorts under _my favorite silk robe_.

I step toward her. "Okay, Elena, it's time to lay down some basic house rules. Number one; only blast music when no one else is home, except me. Number two; you are _not _allowed to wear my silk robe."

She smiles then boldly slips the robe off and lets it drop to the floor. "Katherine is out-again. She's been out all day- unlike one little best friend." She pouts at me.

"What do you want me to do about it?" I snap, retrieving my robe from the floor and throwing it over my head board, in its usual place.

She shrugs. "I'm so bored! Why don't _you _try being cooped up in here all day long?"

"If I could do something, I would."

"Right, I bet you're just _dying _to let me out."

I pause on my way to put my Dior sling-backs away. "What does _that _mean?"

She puts her hands on her hips and purses her lips. "I'm just stating the truth. And I bet you just _love _being the Queen of school."

My stomach drops. "Actually, that's not as certain, as of the late present."

Elena perks up and leans against the threshold of my closet. "Oh, do tell!"

I glare at her; of course she's so happy at my fall from grace. I shouldn't have brought it up. "Nothing too interesting," I spit through my teeth.

"Hmm," Elena murmurs. She only speaks again after I'm comfortably seated on my bed, new script in hand. "Could you use some of my magic charm?"

I roll my eyes. "I've got it under control."

Elena scoffs. "Please; you're not fooling _me. _Just let me help! _Please, _Bonnie, _please!"_

"No, Elena; if someone finds out you're here they'll send you back to Judith," I reason. The part I left out screams silently in the room; _If someone finds out you're here they'll send you back to Judith ... and Robert. _

Elena moans and drops onto my bed beside me on her back. Her arms covering her eyes, "It was a really good plan."

"I'm sure it was," I answer, probably too late because the next thing I know Elena's snoring and I'm being called to supper.

When I creep back upstairs, three rolls and a plate of Greek salad in hand, Elena is wide awake and hungry. I give her the plate and take a hot shower before returning, fully clothed in pyjamas and ready for sleep. Elena's plate is clean and she's patting her stomach satisfactorily.

In the morning, my mother is banging on my door urgently, I nod at Elena and she drops onto the floor and hides under my bed.

When my mother flings my door open, her eyes are wide with terror and sleepless, her mouth suppressing a cry. "Katherine's been kidnapped!"

.

**A/N DUM DUM DUMMMM! I bet you're all wondering what the hell is going to happen next ... Well, I'm wondering the same thing, and so is my amazing Beta, Penny Nickel. But have no fear! We have this totally shocking story arc coming up that is going to knock you're socks off. :) Love you guys! Show me your love by leaving a little review ;) Hugs and kisses!**

**BTW, I realize the whole Bonnie/Parker romance is a tad confusing, seeing as this is a Bamon story, but don't fret; it's all leading up to the climax. :) Who else is wondering about Elenas diabolical plan? I think we all know Elena won't-slash-can't stay silent for too long. ;)**

**Chapter Title:**

**Check Yes Juliet by We The Kings  
**


	17. Heavy Cross

**Chapter 16**

* * *

The school was practically empty the next day. Almost every student had joined the search party to find Katherine; I had come to school. I numbly glided through the hallways, looking for someone or something to help me take a load off.

Unfortunately Parker was M.I.A, Meredith wasn't speaking to me, and my last resort was Stefan, who I was planning on dumping very soon.

That left me with very little options.

I woke up this morning feeling odd. Lately my life felt so surreal that it didn't even feel like my life anymore. Ever since last year, when I left Fells Church, it seemed like everyone had found their way. Caroline had found she had a brain, and didn't really need to use it. Parker got over drugs and found out what he really wanted from me. I don't know what Meredith found out about herself, but clearly she didn't need (or want) me. For instance, this mornings phone call.

I had just finished throwing on a pleated leather mini by Alice + Olivia, and cream colored cropped lace Free People tank, without even bothering to look in the mirror to see if the flowing fabric matched the skirt. My mind had turned to mush that morning; all I could concentrate on was Elena (the possible criminal) sleeping in my bed, Damon basically threatening me the other night, Stefan being completely clueless, my new relationship with Parker, and Caroline getting pictures of Damon and me. Which was a lot if you considered it.

The one thing that didn't seem to be totally hopeless was my friendship with Meredith, but I hadn't talked to her in ages. Did Caroline get to her before me and feed her some warped story?

That was when I made the decision to call Meredith and ask her to meet up.

The phone rang three times before Meredith's somewhat rueful voice answered, "Hello."

Had she been sitting there, contemplating whether to take the call? Oh well, it was a _good _sign that she answered.

"Meredith, hey, we haven't talk in such a long time. Want to walk to school together?"

"No."

Ouch. Not even an explanation. Well, I was the Queen Bee; I could _get _one out of her. "That's too bad ... yet I had such _juicy_ things to share."

She paused.

_Yesss. _I thought. Of course she would take the bait. But Meredith's response wasn't what I expected.

"Do you know what Caroline's telling everyone?"

I tried to keep my voice steady and cool. "It's all lies, of course. You know that, don't you-"

"I'm not sure I do," her voice was sharper this time. "It makes sense that you would try and be the center of attention again."

"What?" I struggled to maintain my composure.

"I'm not saying you're a bad person, Bonnie. I just expected more from you. You said when you got home that things were going to change, but it's like you've fallen right into Elena's shoes; trying to fix what isn't broken, plotting to get ahead. I just thought you had limits."

My throat felt tighter and my voice came out very thin, almost pleading. "If I remember correctly you weren't exactly ready to follow my plan anyway."

Meredith responded immediately, almost like it was rehearsed. "A real Queen wouldn't wait for everyone to follow her. Another thing a real Queen wouldn't do is betray her minions."

I flinched at the term 'minions'. "Merry, you know I didn't start with Damon on purpose- I want Stefan-"

"That's the worst part, Bonnie. You don't even realize. You didn't do it on purpose; but you still won. You and Caroline have been friends for a very long time; do you truly think she'd dump you over on little scandal?"

We both went quiet. I tried to process this.

Was that why Caroline hated me so much? It makes sense ... She seen that it was my room; sure, I could have called him over if she thought I was a slut, but it makes more sense that he would come to see me. Surely she must know I would never really pursue Damon, if I had known they were serious I would have tried not to even think about him so much. But _he _came to _my _room; I didn't force him there.

"So shouldn't Caroline be mad at Damon?" I didn't realize I had spoken this aloud until I did.

I could almost hear Meredith shaking her head.

"You don't get it, Bonnie, you never did. It's not _you_ that's the problem."

But if I'm not the problem and Caroline wasn't, then who did that leave? _Damon? _Was she saying this was all Damon's fault? Did she really hate him that much? I knew the answer; yes, she did. Ever since she first found out about Damon Salvatore she'd been ambivalent towards him, seems she chose finally- and believed he was scum.

I thought Meredith was about to hang up when she said, "Caroline was already planning on overthrowing you, but it might not be so hard now."

"_What?" _I couldn't conceal my shock; how long had she been _planning _this?

"You're so done, Bonnie." Meredith let out a small laugh. "Maybe you should have listened to me when I told you to stay away from Damon. Now you're going to have to pay the consequences."

I was just squeaking out a response when Meredith's line went dead.

Great. Now, not only did I not have any friends, but Damon had officially made Meredith's hit-list. Yet another thing I had to worry about. Fantastic.

My throat felt closed off from Meredith's betrayal. I sort-of-kind-of expected this from Caroline, but level-headed Meredith wasn't supposed to choose sides. When did she decide that, just like Damon, I was also out?

I was walking in the hallway, which was scarce of student life, when Stefan stepped in front of me. From the look in his green eyes, he knew too much.

"Oh... Hey," I mumbled, then angled away from him. If I made my getaway now, I could think of an excuse during Spanish, where I usually daydreamed.

But Stefan stopped me, stepping in front of me and staring me dead-on.

"What is this I'm hearing of you and my brother?" He grabbed my arm a bit roughly.

I cringed internally; being the Queen, I learned how to keep a mean poker face. "Haven't you learned to never believe everything you've heard? You've been around long enough." I tried to keep my face neutral, but couldn't help raising an eyebrow.

He stared at me with a suspicious expression. "What did you just say?"

I yanked my arm away, trying to keep a strong expression. His eyes were flickering to the side self consciously. I turned away from him, heading for the Ladies room. I looked back at him and motioned a little toward the door, telling him that he should follow me.

When I checked under the stalls to make sure no one was there, Stefan was already waiting behind me.

I sat on the counter, crossing my bare legs, pointing my toes out in my light Steve Madden Bellahh pumps that made my legs look very long. I looked up at Stefan. He was standing by the door still, looking as if he was trying to keep his mind off something.

"You were saying?" He said with his jaw strained.

I smirked at him. Clearly I was _rocking _the poker face. I leaned back, trying to look cavalier. "Damon told me about your little secret a couple weeks ago."

"Why would he do that?"

I shrugged. "Maybe because he cares about me a _bit_ more than you do."

Stefan pretended not to hear me; he just stared at me like he thought I was going to run away. "Why are you not afraid?"

I brought my stare level with his, speaking in a low tone. "Why should I be?" Then I stuck my bottom lip out, "Is big, bad Stefan going to make a meal out of me?" Then I raised my eyebrow and smirked wickedly.

Stefan gulped-hard, "Stop."

"Stop what?" I asked, enjoying myself just a little. Everything was spinning so far out of control lately, it felt nice to control something. I jumped down from the sink and walked slowly up to him, placing one foot in front of the other and staring up at him innocently. "Are you going to _make _me stop?"

I was almost in front of him now.

Stefan was watching me, his eyes so serious I almost laughed- but that would have ruined the whole charade.

"What's wrong, Steffy? Are you afraid to do something you'll ... regret?" I stepped closer to him and trailed a hand down his flat-muscled stomach, settling it just above the waistline of his expensive jeans.

"Bonnie, I mean it."

I was so close to him now I could feel the heat radiating off his body. I turned my head toward his, my lips parting. "Make me."

Stefan was staring down at me with eyes that were almost angry. He spit through his teeth. "Stop."

My teeth clenched. What, just like everyone else, he didn't want me now? I stared boldly back at him. "No."

Then, all of a sudden, I was in Stefan's arms. When our lips first touched he gave a little moan. He was kissing me so fiercely it would feel rude to pull away. He pulled me against him, so close I could feel every curve of his flat muscled body. He arched over me so I bended back, but kept one hand on the small of my back. To say kissing Stefan was not enjoyable would be blasphemous. He was very good at kissing, actually.

Then he seemed to have let loose his enthusiasm. He was holding the small of my back so tightly I was afraid it would break my back. His lips crushed into mine with so much force, my lips felt bruised. I turned my head away and his lips crashed against my jaw. He kissed sloppily against my jaw, down my neck.

"Stefan, stop!"

But he didn't. Instead, my protests seemed to make him fiercer. His hands found their way under my shirt, gripping my bare back. I felt his tongue tracing my jugular, one more second and it would be _Bye Bye Bonnie._

Somehow I found the strength to push his away. He was rock solid; I don't think I could have done it if he hadn't snapped out of it. I certainly wasn't strong enough to beat off a vampire.

Stefan looked like a deer caught in head lights. For a moment I wondered if he was even aware of what had just gone on. His emerald green eyes widened, his pupils dilated, as he took in my terrified expression and my disheveled clothes. He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it there as he backed up, still with that deer-in-headlights look.

"I told you to stop," his voice was throaty and rough.

I couldn't think of anything to say. I was still in shock. "I-I can't do this anymore."

He didn't make an effort to fix his clothes or wipe off his mouth. Instead he just left the washroom without another word, not even glancing back.

I walked toward the mirror, my legs felt numb. I wasn't even aware of what I was doing as I splashed my face with water and brought color back to my cheeks by pinching them hastily. My hands felt like phantom limbs as I smoothed down my hair, fixing loose curls.

In the mirror, my face was a reflection of an Ice Queen.

I pulled lip gloss from my purse and tried to apply it, but my hands were so shaky I couldn't even get the stupid brush out of the tube. I stared at my quivering hands.

"Work, god dammit. _Work_."

While I was pestering my hands to stop shaking, silent tears streamed down my face. Then I was sinking onto the dirty floor of the washroom, trying to numb out what had just happened- but my body wasn't cooperating.

Just another thing to add to the list of things I couldn't explain. Two things I was absolutely sure about; Stefan was about to drink my blood, and possibly kill me, and for some reason I had seduced him into it. Some dark force had propelled me in that moment, almost like I didn't care about the outcome. Thank god I snapped out of it.

What was _wrong _with me?

.

_Dear Diary,_

_This is the first entry ever in my new diary. My mother just gave it to me to "air out my feelings", as she put it. She must see how unfocused I seem, how terrified I feel. Can you really blame me? Lately things have ... changed. I don't even know if that's the right word._

_I shouldn't write about all my secrets in here, what if my mom made an extra key for the lock? The most discreet thing I can say is that I'm in way over my head._

_Tyler and I have been practicing as much as I can bear for the Romeo and Juliet play. He insists we need to work on our chemistry. Parker refuses to practice with me, saying we'll do just fine on the spot. I don't think he knows how overwhelmed I feel. Parker can only guess._

_The Spring Talent Show, aka Constance Peace Gala, is only a couple weeks away, and there's still so much to prepare for I feel a head rush coming on just thinking about it. I know I have to sing Defying Gravity ... but I know my heart won't be in it enough to pull it off, much less _win _the Talent Show._

_I haven't spoken to Stefan since, well, you know when. Every time he sees me he veers the other way. I know it's for the best. I still have nightmares over what might have happened if he didn't snap out of it._

_Damon is just as M.I.A. I keep telling myself he's not worth damaging my reputation anymore ... but when I close my eyes, his crow-black eyes are all I see. When I'm lying in bed at night, I long for his arms around me ..._

_Katherine hasn't been found yet, even though it's been days. The search party was called off on Day 2 when they found nothing. My mother has been worried sick, she barely has any time to worry about anything else but Katherine. Maybe that's why she gave me this stupid journal._

_I need to sleep now; tomorrow's another day._

.

**A/N Thanks for reading! As always I ask you to leave a quick review telling me your thoughts. (: **

**Chapter Title:**

**Heavy Cross by Gossip**


	18. Blackout

**A/N Hola! I wish I could apologize for taking so long to update, but it turns out that it was absolutely necessary to my health. Needless to say, I spent a lot of time in the hospital this month and most of last month. I suffered some serious writers block. But enough about me! If you have any more Q's you can just PM me! haha :)**

**I hope my adoring fans, aka you guys, love this chapter and appreciate this new twist! It's a work-in-progress so don't go flying off the handle with billions of questions: All will be revealed in time. Sooner or later, everything has to fall into place.  
**

**One more thing ... PLEASE REVIEW! **

**Chapter 17**

* * *

My sneakers slapped meticulously against the pavement as I crossed through the new part of the cemetery—I was so close to my escape. I should have seen it coming. I should have paid more attention.

The cold air whipped my pale hair back, sending sharp splinters of ice across my face and neck. The wind tore my hood off and chilled me almost to the bone. I felt close to collapsing. But I had to keep running. _He _would get me. I should have known this would happen: Vampires could never be trusted. When he came to me, he was in so much pain. He wanted her so badly it tore him apart. If I'd turned him down that night, would I be in this situation?

Something flitted past me, or so it seemed. No time for thinking, just keep running! But my legs felt worn, I couldn't run forever. The bridge was _so close; _I could see the last row of gravestones.

My breaths were getting faster, my heart inflated with fear. I could almost sense him behind me—getting closer and closer.

Then, as quick as the snap of a whip, he was standing in front of me.

I screamed and veered left, running along the row of crosses.

"You know you can't win, Katherine," he drawled.

My breathing started to hitch; I could feel the terrified tears running down my porcelain skin. I had no direction in mind anymore; I just had to get away from him.

Suddenly I was knocked to the ground, mid-stride. My legs flew out from under me and I landed against the ground on my back. The blow knocked the air out of me. I was pretty sure something was broken, a rip maybe, or my spleen. I was choking on something, doubling over in pain. Where I spit, blood coated the ground.

I stared at my pale hands, which were now covered in blood. I let out a small cry and looked up at my pursuer. "What do you want?" I screamed, my throat sounding rough and hitched. I glared into his light blue eyes. "I did _everything _you asked! I got Elena here, made Meredith hate Bonnie! I even ran away from home for you! What more do you want?" Tears fell down my face again, and I didn't bother wiping them. Maybe he'll see them and feel pity.

Parker Belmont leaned down, smiling at me with pearly white teeth that could only belong to a vampire. His gaze was hard, nothing like the mask he put on around Bonnie.

"My darling," Parker whispered, brushing hair away from my cheek.

I leaned my face into his hand, wanting more than anything for him to take me away, to tell me he loves me and was only joking. He must be playing another game, he has to be.

"I only want to be loved," he finished, giving me a rueful smile.

"I love you."

Parker's smile dropped and he pushed my face away roughly, all but tearing my heart out, shattering my reverie. No, I didn't love him; he was a monster! A horrible monster. All those things I did for him, all the hours I wasted. My sister's love and respect—wasted. My sister's _life _wasted. She doesn't even know. She's not looking out for the right people. I have to warn her. I have to get out of here and tell her, somehow. She mustn't get closer to Parker. She has to _know. _How could I have done this to her? Oh, god.

Parker smirked, lighting up the truly evil side of him. "Pretty Katherine, you're just too late."

I had forgotten he could read minds. He can control the weather, and bend the future to his will. No wonder it seemed impossible for me to outrun him, despite all the physical reasons. He was controlling everything.

"Please," I begged. "Just-just let me go!"

He was already shaking his head before I finished. "Now, you know I can't let that happen."

He was getting farther, and I realized I was backing away from him, my flight instinct kicking in. "Please, please, please," I gasped, and my tears coming faster and faster. I can't die. I don't want to die. I'm too young, too pretty. There's so much promise in my future. I have to warn Bonnie; she can't suffer the same fate as me. "Please, Parker, please!" I sobbed.

All the while, he was advancing, coming towards me excruciatingly slowly. His face wore a huge smile; his eyes brimmed with a shadow of darkness, turning dark blue instead of light, and his posture regal and King-like. Parker had set his aim to the kill; I had seen him like this before. There was no stopping him now.

He gripped my shoulder, lifting me up and pressing me against him, so close I could feel his erection: Killing aroused him.

I tried one last time, looking into his persistent eyes. "Parker, please. Just-just think about this. I'm your-your most _trustworthy_ ally. You-you trust me. And trust springs eternal love, right?" I swallowed, looking deep into the blue, trying to see wavering.

Parker's face went soft, and a little dip formed between his eyebrows, "I don't think I've ever heard that one." Then he opened his mouth wide, showing off long, sparkling canines.

"No, please, wait!" I screamed. Mercifully, he halted and I hurried out my response. "You can't do this without me—you _need me!_"

Parker was steadying me, his insane eyes focused on the spot on my neck. "There are always ways."

Then his fangs stabbed into my neck, crimson blood oozed out so rapidly, that it was only a matter of seconds before black fog narrowed my vision ... then complete blackness.

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Blackout by Muse**


	19. Cosmic Love

**Chapter 18**

* * *

At around 4 in the morning, I heard Elena rolling out of bed. I wondered if I should sit up and demand what she was doing, but I was so consumed with fatigue that I decided against it.

When I fully awoke in the morning, Elena still wasn't in bed. Worry instantly overcame me. I wrapped myself up in my pearl silk robe and stuck my feet in tasteful Kate Spade slippers.

I opened the door to my room and crept quietly down to carpeted hall, thanking god we didn't have wood floors. My heart pounded so rapidly as I passed my parents' door that I was sure they could hear it, but I didn't hear a stirring.

Sneaking down the narrow staircase, I kept my eyes peeled for signs of Elena, but nothing stuck out. After a lap around the middle floor of my house, and a quick look into the basement, I decided that she had left for good.

As I climbed the stairs I cursed myself for being rude to Elena over the past week. It wasn't her fault I was in such a crappy mood, and I shouldn't have taken it out on my best (and only) friend.

When I got to my room I fell into bed again, but was so consumed with thoughts that sleep wouldn't come. I let out a huge breath and once again threw the covers back. My room seemed very empty without Elena.

At 8:30am, I decided it was an appropriate time to wake up. It was Saturday, and I definitely didn't have any plans, so maybe sleeping in would have been a good idea. But I couldn't even relax my stiff posture, let alone sleep.

I kept thinking about Katherine, for some strange reason. I know I should have been psyched that she's gone ... but I just couldn't shake the feeling that something horrible might have happened to her. It was such a stupid thing to worry about; if I went missing, Katherine surely wouldn't have missed a wink of sleep. But I couldn't help regretting the things I said to her, I wondered if she thought I might actually hate her.

But something bad _might _have happened to her. There were all sorts of bad people out there, and I knew from experience that the world was a much bigger, mysterious place that I thought. If the Salvatore brothers were vampires, then surely there were more mythical creatures out there, hiding in the shadows?

I wondered, also, where Elena had gone, and whether she was okay. She may have gone back to Aunt Judith, but where else could she have gone? She had no money, no clothes, and no home. All she had was me and her old life here. Why would she want to leave?

Suddenly I noticed something, something I should have noticed the moment I woke up.

My hand reached up and touched my throat, when they met soft skin, my heart went haywire. My necklace! The beautiful family heirloom that had seemed so important in Stefan's eyes! I had been wearing it every day since he had taken interest in it at the park that one day.

_Elena! _She must have taken it! But _why?_

I jumped out of bed and stalked down the hall, stopping at my parents' door. I knocked on it 3 times before my mother came to answer it. She looked like she had just gotten out of bed.

"What is it, sweet heart?"

"I need to talk to you," I answered, my voice shaking.

Her dark brown eyes raked over me, taking in my worried expression. "Is everything okay?"

Suddenly, I felt like crying. "I'm not sure."

My mom stepped out of her room and closed the door behind her. She put both hands on my arms, holding me back to look at. "You can tell me anything, Bonnie. That's why I'm here."

I nodded, "You know that feeling of hopelessness, when your life is spiralling out of control?"

She was quiet for a moment, "Sure."

"I just ... I mean, I don't know what's wrong with me, mommy. Nothing makes sense anymore!" Tears brim my eyes, and I look up to meet her eyes. I had missed looking into them and seeing sympathy. For so long I only saw judgment and fear, this maternal gaze was what I missed.

Just as she opened her mouth to respond, the doorbell rang. She pressed her lips together, and smoothed my hair back. "Can we continue this discussion later, Bonnie? This might be about Katherine."

The anger shot through me like adrenaline, "Of course."

She stepped past me and practically ran down the stairs. When I heard her startled cry, I followed toute suite, but when I got to the last step, I froze.

Standing in the doorway, looking sweet and fragile, was Katherine.

"Katherine, my baby! Oh, my darling," My mom cried, wrapping her thin arms around Katherine's petite frame. Katherine's dark violet eyes rested on me.

"I missed you, too, mom."

"Where were you?" I blurted, not able to contain myself. I had just been thinking she had been mauled by vampires, and here she was; completely fine.

"I was over at a friend's house, studying for final exams," She smirked. "Where did you think I was?"

I felt like I was missing some huge, private joke. I crossed my arms, not able to stop my next words. "I hoped you might have fallen off a bridge-"

"Bonnie!" My mom gasped. "That's no way to talk to your sister!"

Anger boiled in my veins again, and I could see red. "_She's not my sister!_" I exploded, then turned and raced upstairs with embarrassment; Katherine must have wanted to make me look bad in front of my mom.

I slammed my door behind me—hard—and fell into my bed face-first. Katherine must have some sort of radar for when my mother and I were starting to bond, how else could her sudden appearance be explained?

I decided to work on some homework, to get my mind off of Katherine. But just as I was opening up my notebook, Katherine came knocking.

"Come in," I called through my teeth.

Katherine came in, and closed to door behind her. "Hello," she giggled.

I didn't say anything; she must have something to tell me if she came in here. After a moment of silence, I broke. "What is it?"

She came up to me and dropped onto my bed. "Miss me?"

"No," I snapped.

She rolled onto her side and looked at me. For the first time I noticed her eyes weren't violet ... they were dark blue. They were Elena's eyes.

I gasped. "Elena?" I whispered, "What the fuck are you doing?"

Elena giggled. "It's all part of my plan, sweetie; you'll thank me later."

I gaped at her, absolutely outraged. "Have you any idea what you've done? You can't pretend to be Katherine forever, Elena. She's going to come back, or my mom's going to notice difference."

She shook her head and sat up, touching my arm reassuringly. "That's not going to happen, Bonnie. You have to trust me."

"Why should I trust you at all? You're deceiving my mother, and you act like that's normal. You're stealing someone identity, which is illegal, times, like, fifty!"

"I have it all figured out, Bonnie. I've been thinking about this for a while."

I paused. "You have?"

She nodded.

"Is there anything else you're not telling me?"

Elena picked at a loose string on my comforter, not meeting my eyes. Then she sighed and reached into the pocket of her sweater, pulling out my necklace. She dropped it into my hands and stared at it. "I took it this morning, but you probably already figured that out. I just wanted to know what it was."

My heartbeat picked up; I had been wondering the same thing. "What did you find out?"

"You're not mad?"

"Not anymore. Now, what did you find out?"

She sighed, "The stone is called lapis lazuli, and the store owner said it's pretty rare. It also has this weird herb in it, vervain or something. It's supposed to taste really good in tea."

My eyebrows pinched in confusion, "Why is there an herb in my necklace?"

She shrugged, her eyes still locked on the necklace. "The guy I went to didn't know. He said the last time he saw it in a piece of jewellery was during the Civil War."

"Wow," I breathed, and then smiled at her while hooking it back around my neck. "I guess it's a real piece of history then, right?"

Elena met my eyes, and then touched the necklace with her fingertip. "It's a really pretty blue, like the color of the deep sea."

I looked down at it, really noticing it for the first time. The antique setting held three small blue stones with flecks of gold. I looked back at Elena, and then realized something. "They look like your eyes," I mumbled.

She smiled wide, "Yeah, I guess they kind of do."

We both jumped at the sound of the doorbell ringing, and we both laughed after a moment. "Come on," I smiled, grabbing her hand. "You don't have to be cooped up in here any longer!"

"There's an upside," She agreed.

My mother wasn't in sight when Elena and I emerged from my room. When we got to the front door, Parker was standing behind it.

"Hey," I greeted him, "Meet my sister, Katherine."

She stepped around me and held out her hand, "How do you do?" She giggled.

Parker took her hand and shook once, "Fine, thank you, Madame. I'm Parker Belmont, Bonnie's boyfriend."

For some reason my skin tingled at the term—but it was extremely unpleasant. Like I was getting a rash or something.

"Would you mind if I spoke with your sister for a moment?"

"Yeah, yeah, just keep it down. Big sis' needs some rest," She gave me a wink before climbing back up the stairs.

I opened the door wider for him to enter, and then led him into the living room.

"Where are your parents?" He asked, sitting on the couch with his arms spread wide.

I dropped beside him. "I have no idea. They were here a minute ago, but I guess they had something to do."

Parker leaned down and kissed my cheek tenderly, making his way to my ear. "Do you think Katherine would mind ...?"

I took a deep breath and pushed on his chest, looking into his light blue eyes. "Parker ... I don't know, I mean, it's only 10:30."

For a second, his eyes flashed and for a moment I was scared of him. Then he smiled lightly and leaned back. "My apologies for being like every other teenage boy in the presence of an enchanting young woman."

I smiled half-heartedly. "Well, while you're here, do you want to run lines for the play?"

He pretended to think about it, and then smirked, leaning in for another kiss. "Maybe later ..."

"Parker ..." I mumbled. I didn't like shutting him down, but I totally wasn't in the mood. Couldn't he see that? "Parker, let's just hang out, okay? We can do something _extra _fun tonight," I raised my eyebrows suggestively.

His jaw clenched and he moved away from me. "You can just tell me if you're not attracted to me," he mumbled. "I get it. I know I don't look like Damon Salvatore-"

"Why are you bringing Damon into this?"

He shrugged, looking like a little kid. I instantly felt bad. "I just know that's what girls like. I'm never going to be like that."

I grabbed his hand and moved closer to him, pleading with my eyes. "Parker, I don't want you to be anything more than what you already are!" Then, because it seemed like the right moment, I leaned in and planted a soft, lingering kiss on his lips. "Are you okay now?"

He smiled, cocking his head to the side. "Course I am, doll face. Whatta fine mornin'! Wanna take a quick stroll?"

"I really should rehearse my lines," I answered ruefully. "But can you come back later tonight?"

Parker's smile dropped and he stood, instantly shutting me out. "Maybe. I'll call you later."

And I felt myself standing; wanting to turn his frown upside down, like it was programmed in my Girlfriend Gene or something. "Well, maybe a short walk would be nice, let me get my coat."

"Perfect," he said, smiling, showing off sparkling white teeth.

.

**A/N Parker's showing a little bit of his craziness off, right? And so the plot thickens! What do you guys think Bonnie will do next? Please review! ;) XOXO**

**Chapter Title:**

**Cosmic Love by Florence + The Machine**


	20. Take It All

**A/N Hola, amigos! Updating about 3 hours after my last update, I just got a rush of inspiration. Hope y'all like it, and please leave a little review! XOXO  
**

**Chapter 19**

* * *

The next day went great, Elena and me had a girly night. We painted each other's nails, drank inconspicuously (since my parents didn't let me drink in the house), and watched _Never Been Kissed_. I know my mom was overjoyed that "Katherine" and I were bonding, and that made me a bit ticked off since my goal in life, as a daughter, was too rebel against my parents. But, to be honest, it was one of the best weekends I had since coming back to Fells Church.

Now the weekend was over, and I had to face school. If you have asked me a week ago whether I liked going to school, I'd answer yes, but now I dreaded the idea.

"Wear this," Elena recommended, handing me a structured black Helmut Lang dress.

I scowled at her, "I'm going to school, not an institution."

Elena hung the dress back on the rack, "If you don't like it, why do you have it? Oh, here a thought! Give it to me, because, honey, it's fabulous."

"It's not that I don't like it," I mumbled, flipping through racks of clothes. "It just doesn't seem _right."_

She studied me thoughtfully and then whispered, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," I answered quickly.

"Come on, you'll feel better once it's off your chest."

I bit my lip, then nose-sighed. "You're right. Okay, well, about a week ago someone sent a photo to Caroline ... A very racy photo of her boyfriend and me. He was the guy who came over the other week, you remember him? He chipped my window?"

"Yes, I remember. Carry on."

"So, she got that photo and freaked out, like it was _my _fault that _he _came over to my house and kissed me. Caroline told everyone about it, and now everyone thinks I'm a little whore." I shuddered, thinking about the whispers circulating behind my back. I met Elena's blue eyes and turned toward her. "From one Queen to another, I am giving you my word that I didn't want anything to happen between Damon and me. It was all just a huge misunderstanding."

Elena let me stir in my thoughts politely, and then quietly answered. "From one Queen to another, Bonnie, I just think they're threatened by you."

Her response confused me, and I expressed that through my expression.

Elena elaborated. "Caroline, Meredith, and all those other girls know that you can have any guy you want, and they feel threatened. They know that you're the girl to be and the girl to get, and they don't like the power you have." She paused thoughtfully and then continued. "From what I remember of Caroline, she must be feeling most embarrassed, and that's adding to the hurt. If everyone knows about that photograph, then everyone must know that Damon picked you over her, and she must hate that. That's probably why she's playing the victim.

"Caroline and Meredith must also hate that you keep on coming out the gold star while they end up 2nd and 3rd place. They want to feel important, like they're Alpha's too. But you can't have it both ways, Bonnie," Elena said, her voice dropping low. "You either get their respect back or their friendship. Meaning, you're either the Queen or a best mate. Which is it going to be?"

Suddenly the ground felt very hot. It felt like Elena's eyes were boring into me, forcing me to make this life-or-death situation a snap decision. The walls had eyes too, suddenly, and they were watching me, their judging eyes screwing into me, awaiting my call. Too much pressure, I couldn't think properly.

"I can't make this decision right now, Elena," I gasped, leaning into soft silk blouses.

She nodded. "I understand, Bonnie; I had to leave my kingdom once, too." Her eyes dotted with tears and her bottom lip quivered, "But life is full of tough choices: You just have to find the best alternative for you.

"Now, chin up," Elena said, managing a small smile. She reached into the rack and pulled out a light pink Free People sweater. "This top would look adorable on you."

.

When I got to school, everyone stared, except it wasn't like when everyone stared during my first day back. Back then, they were in awe, and now, they were malevolent. I could sense the hate in their eyes.

They didn't stop conversation as I passed, instead it started up stronger.

"Did you hear what she did?..."

"...had sex with her boyfriend!"

"What a slut!"

"...think she'll sleep with me?"

I picked up the pace, leaving everyone's hateful stares behind me. It was official; I officially had no friend in the whole school.

Well, there was one exception.

I had never been happier to see Parker standing by my locker. I was so happy, in fact, that I had to restrain myself from kissing him; it wouldn't do any good for my new "slutty" image.

"Hey!" I greeted him delightfully.

Parker gave me a small hug and a peck on the cheek. "What class do you have first?"

"American History," I responded, leaving out the "Honors" part. "I was wondering if you wanted to go to the Constance Peace Gala with me." I looked up to meet his eyes, noticing for the first time that they were cloudy, "Unless you don't want to."

"Course I want to, my lady. I was under the impression you were attending the event with none other than Stefan Salvatore."

I froze, my blood running cold. "Who told you about that?"

"Hmm?" He asked, glancing at me, and then looking away nonchalantly. "Oh, Caroline let it slip during Drama club the other day."

Clearing my throat, I tried to shake the strange feeling I had felt just moments ago, "Right, of course she did. How else could you have known?"

"Bonnie," a voice said. When I turned, I realized it was Stefan. "May I have a word?"

"Um ..."

"Go on, doll face," Parker said, his hand grazing my hip. "I'll see you later."

I turned back to Stefan, suddenly feeling very wary. The stares hadn't gotten any better, but when Stefan showed up they only became more curious. "What is it, Stefan?"

"I was thinking about you the other day ..."

I raised my eyebrows. "Interesting star-off," I mumbled.

"Are we still going to the Spring Talent Show?" He asked. His eyes looked very green today, and they were very pretty, but that was it—they were just nice to look at. They didn't give me butterflies, and they didn't make me feel anything different than when I looked into Parkers. Was that a bad thing?

"I was planning on going with my boyfriend," I answered, watching his face.

He nodded, like that made perfect sense. "Of course, as you should. I just ... I wonder if you _feel _something with him."

It took me a moment before I could answer. "Excuse me?"

Stefan shifted his feet, and leaned in closer before answering. "You know what I am, but I don't think you know what it implies. Damon most likely did not explain it all. We have superior physical strength, but we can also do things you couldn't dream of."

I swallowed hard, "Try me."

His eyes went a shade darker, or that's what it looked like. "I can tell what you're thinking, I can't read your thoughts but I can _feel_ them. I can also enter your dreams, or just watch. I can also make you do anything I want or say anything I want."

Again, my brain was flooded with so much information; it took me a moment to respond. My mind was making all these connections that I couldn't interrupt. The time at the carnival when Damon had told me to not be frightened, to take his secret with grace and kindness, and I had felt myself comply without even giving a solid consent. I had wondered about that then, now I had my answer.

"I can feel when you're unhappy, or gleeful, or rejected, or ambitious, or spiteful ... And I can feel you're unhappy with your new boyfriend."

I took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of my petite nose. "Don't, Stefan, just don't even try. I'm a lost cause, trust me. No matter who I'm with, I'm always going to feel unhappy. It's part of being human."

He touched my forearm, almost pleading me, "It doesn't have to be-"

I tore my arm back, "And you think you're going to be the one to change that?" I shook my head.

The final bell had long since gone, and Mr. Saltzman wasn't going to be happy with me.

"I have to go, Stefan," I mumbled, not meeting his eyes. "See you around."

But as I was turning away, Stefan called me back. His voice sounded so hurt and confused, that I had to turn toward him.

"Why did you even bother, then?" He asked, his voice cracking. "Why would you lead me on, make me believe you actually cared, if you didn't even feel the same way? What was in it for you?"

My lips parted, but only air came out. Damn, he had made the connection; I should have known he was too smart. I took three deep breaths before answering him, and when I did my voice was weak. "I wanted to be seen with you ... to help my popularity," I said.

He was quiet for the longest time; I thought maybe he hadn't heard me ... until he responded. "You're despicable," he spit, bringing tears to my eyes. Then Stefan shook his head, turning away from me. "You belong with my brother."

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Take It All by Adele**


	21. Go Your Own Way

**Chapter 20**

* * *

_Dear Diary, _

_It seems Elena has taken on all of Katherine's responsibilities, but for some reason she loves it. Maybe they didn't have SAT Prep in Pennsylvania?  
_

_After my little conversation with Stefan, I had gone to class, obviously. Mr. Saltzman was peeved, but decided to let it slip, just this one time, as he put it. I learned absolutely nothing that class, because I couldn't take my mind off of what Stefan had said about me belonging with Damon._

_To be honest, I had thought the same thing myself. Did I belong with Damon? I hadn't even seen him since he came to visit me in my bedroom, but maybe it was for the best. If I was seen with Damon right now, everyone would think I was slutting it up. But ... it seemed impossible to deny the attraction between Damon and me. __And I miss him._

_God, I shouldn't have written that._

_All I will say is that I wish things were easier. I wish decisions weren't so god damn hard to make. I wish I didn't have such conflicting feelings over who I should be with. And I wish it was easier to find love._

_In movies, it's so easy to spot the Guy. He's right there, right in front of her, and the leading lady and he always share this super-long, sexually charged gaze. And bam! The lady knows she loves him. But it never actually happened like that, Hollywood was _way _off the mark. Instead, you could go from having zero guys pine for you, to having three super fine men falls at your heels. Okay, well, technically I have two now._

_ But I still mean it. _

_Elena has shown some interest in Stefan, so maybe I can make him get over me faster if I introduce them. They might make a cute couple. Notice I'm using "might" a lot? I've decided that nothing is ever certain. See, if I had said 'They _will_ make a cute couple', who's to say they will? Might is a much safer route. Maybe that's my problem; I always go with the safer route? I won't surrender my feelings over to Damon, because he seems so ambivalent and dishonest. Parker is the safer route. Parker has always been the safest route. Am I my own problem?_

_If so, at least now I know how to cure myself, well ... all's hope._

_.  
_

I dropped my pen at the sound of twigs breaking outside. I was sitting in the family sitting room, on the bay window's bench. The window was open a touch, letting lukewarm wind blow in. I had been sitting there, writing in my new diary while Elena was out and listening to the wind blow.

Now, aware as I was, I heard someone (or something) trekking just outside my window. I closed the diary on the pen and kneeled in front of the window, looking out across the lawn.

Just as I was about to blame my ears for playing tricks on me, I saw someone running away from the house. They were wearing a black hood, but as they jumped the fence, the hood fell and I got a good view of the back of their head.

It looked like ... _Parker_.

.

Parker walked me to and from classes for the rest of that day. It was nice to have some company, since I still was getting used to having no friends, and Elena assured me it would get better; that people got over things easily. It was the first time Elena had ever been wrong. What wasn't nice, was the vibes I was probably sending off. I _know _that I saw Parker running away from my house last night, but why would he have been sneaking around my house? It made no sense, ergo, my eyes were probably seeing things.

I _was_ feeling a little insane.

"Are you sure you don't need a ride home?" I asked Parker, unlocking the door to my shiny black Ford Fiesta. Parker hadn't strayed from my side all day, except for during classes, and to be honest, I was feeling sort of smothered. It was like when I was dating Stefan and he didn't want to spend one second of free time away from me, but then I knew it was because he felt threatened by Damon.

Parker met my eyes, his light blue eyes abnormally clouded. "I have to go camping with my pops, so he's picking me up." He grabbed my hand and started toying with my fingers.

For some reason the gesture made my stomach hurt. "Okay."

It felt like Parker expected me to say something else, but I didn't know what that was. Did he want me to say that I loved him? Did he want to hear that I would miss him? None of those things were particularly true.

I cleared my throat, breaking the uncomfortable silence. "Well, have fun."

Disappointment shaded his eyes a notch darker. "See you later, Bonnie," he backed away from me, letting go of my hand, and then he turned away.

"Um, hang on a sec," I called.

He turned back eagerly. "Yes?"

I took a deep breath, a little afraid of what his answer would be. "What were you doing at my house last night?"

Parker's eyes turned dark blue, and his mouth went into a protective smile that didn't reach his guarded eyes. "I wasn't at your house."

The more I searched his face, the more I didn't want to see. I wanted to believe him ... but his expression was one of a guilty party. "Okay, I believe you," I finally said, my throat felt swollen, like I had just swallowed a big pill. "I, uhm, I should probably go ..." It felt like I was about to cry, and if I stuck around Parker one more second, he would probably notice.

"Alright," he said, stepping forward and kissing my forehead.

His lips were cold, they stung, and they felt foreign. There was something different about him, I couldn't put my finger on it, but it frightened me terribly.

I left without another word, and without looking into this stranger's eyes again.

.

I stepped out of my car and looked at the grand house. It was bigger than most homes in Fells Church and looked like it was from a different time. My heart felt ten times heavier as I ascended the few stairs to the double front doors of the Salvatore Residence.

Taking three deep breaths, I held the brass knocker and tapped four times. By the time I finished the fourth knock, a small woman with frown lines was opening the door. She was wearing a blue servant garb, and I decided she must be a maid.

"Hello," I said, praying to god that she spoke English. "Is Damon in?"

She nodded her small, rounded head, wringing her tiny hands on her apron. "_Sí._"

Her response made my heart thud even harder against my chest, and I forced myself to calm down. It had taken forever to work up the nerve to come here, and I knew this had to be done.

I spoke slowly, so she would understand. "May I come in?"

Her eyes clouded over, and her lips pursed. This sentence seemed to have different meaning to her. "Wait here," she responded with a heavy Spanish accent. She closed the door on me, almost refusing to let me in.

With a huff, I turned and sat on a bench near the door.

Not a moment later, Damon was standing beside me. "Well, hello."

I jumped up and turned to face him. I drank him in, his stunning night-black eyes, his perfect pale pink lips, his beautiful, lean body ... Seeing him brought on all new emotions that I forgot I could feel. My heart pitter-pattered at the sight of him, and even though I knew he could hear it and feel all my emotions, it didn't make me feel any different.

Again, I made myself calm down. "Why wouldn't your maid let me in?" I asked, thinking of the first thing that came to mind.

"Because she thinks you're a vampire," Damon answered easily, his eyes raked over my face and body, too.

I stepped towards him boldly, biting the bullet. "I've missed you, Damon," I looked down, avoiding his eyes. I could feel the scarlet blush beginning to burn its way onto my face, but there was no going back now. I had to get it over with. "I tried to talk myself out of it but-but it's like you have this power over me ... and I'm scared," I looked up and met his eyes.

They were questioning, making a decision. I continued even more quickly, "Those things I said to you about Stefan ... they weren't nice. I shouldn't have said them and I wish I could take them back. I'm sorry." I couldn't believe I had just spilled my guts out, but it felt good to get it all out. Elena had been right about that.

Damon was quiet for a very long time, and then he finally responded. "This is unexpected."

I took a deep breath through my nose and blew out slowly. "I know it is, but Damon, I need your help."

He stiffened and squinted suspiciously. "Oh?"

"It's about Parker, I-I think there might be something wrong with him," I looked up, trying to seem austere. "I have to figure out what he is."

Damon smirked, sending my heart into overdrive, and dropped onto the bench, spreading his arms across the back of it. "It's not like all of us monsters get together at some club."

"I know ... but maybe you'd know what he was, if you, you know, saw him," I paused, waiting for him to catch on.

It didn't take him long; he smiled as if this greatly amused him. "You want me to follow him?"

I say beside him and set a hand on his thigh, as if I was comfortable with touching him, even though it made my stomach do back-flips. "Damon, if I don't know what he is then I don't know what he's capable of."

His smile dropped, "You never know what you're getting yourself into, do you?"

I glared, "Does anyone ever really know?"

"You move too fast," he stated matter-of-factly.

I looked down, trying to calm my anger. My emotions always escalated around Damon. "I don't see how that's a bad thing, Damon. If you don't chase what you want, you'll never catch it," I met his black eyes, they seemed shinier today. I swallowed, trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach.

"Why don't you break up with him?"

My blood ran cold at the thought, and I was very quiet when I answered, "Because I'm afraid of what he might do."

He sighed and turned toward me, "Fine, I'll help you, but you're going to have to do something for me ..."

"What would that be?" I asked, refraining from responding with '_Anything_'. Coming off as a horny harpy would not be good.

Damon smiled wide, showing off pearly white teeth, he leaned forward and brushed a lock of curly, crimson red hair out of my face and tucked it behind my ear. The gesture was so gentle, that I felt myself trembling. I no longer had butterflies in my stomach, they were bats.

"Sing with me at the Constance Peace Gala," his beautiful lips parted, and I thought about pressing mine against his. His hand was on my shoulder, and I was sure he could feel me melting.

It took me less than a minute to reply, and my hands started to shake with excitement. "Okay."

.

**A/N So there you have it! I listened to your reviews and brought Damon back into the story, I promise you he will be a permanent figure throughout the rest of the story. Please review!**

**Chapter Title:**

**Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood Mac**


	22. Where I Stood

**Chapter 21  
**

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_Here's the problem: I loved Damon Salvatore. Want to know the really amazing part? I love Damon Salvatore! I guess you're wondering how on earth there could be a problem with that ... well, for one, I have a boyfriend. The other thing is that my reputation is hanging by a thread and if I went public with Damon it would be complete social suicide. Surprisingly, I don't really care about latter. I just know it's a factor. But, if I was being honest with myself, I'd say that being popular was less desirable than being loved._

_So, once again I find myself in a conundrum of sorts._

_Of course, being popular isn't in the question. I'm Queen. I will always be Queen Bonnie, no matter what anyone says. Still, when I walk into a room everyone admires, and the girls still copy my style and poise. They can't help it. They need someone to look up to, and no one else makes the cut, fortunately._

_The problem, of late, is Parker. I'm starting to see why it isn't good to date one of your best friends. I didn't want to hurt Parker, but I knew I couldn't stay away from Damon. It's not like I don't love Parker ... I just love him in a different way. How was I ever going to explain myself?_

_.  
_

It's Saturday night. I'm supposed to meet Damon at some swanky bar just outside of town, but something is keeping me from leaving. There's a little nagging voice in the back of my head telling me that it's guilt that's keeping me from opening my front door, getting into my car and meeting Damon. But it's not like anything is going to happen; we're meeting up _because_ of Parker-at least that's what I keep telling myself.

So, why the guilt? Is it because I know I've already come to the conclusion that I want Damon more that Parker?

Sigh. Yes, of course that's why.

"What are you doing?" Elena asks, coming up behind me.

I jump, startled, and then meet her narrowed gaze. "I'm actually asking myself the same question. I know I must look ridiculous, standing here like this."

Elena nodded. "Where are you going all dolled up? Romantic date with Parker?" She raises her eyebrows suggestively and licks her lips.

I roll my eyes, "Oh please! No, it's more of a business thing."

"Honey, no one wears hot heels to a business thing."

My heart pounds, and I can feel the sweat pick up in my brow. I had spent so much time getting ready that I hadn't even thought of a good excuse, or what it might look like to someone on the outside. In my four inch Steve Madden heels and cat-eye liner plus rouge lips, I must have looked like a high class call girl. Thank god I had the sense to throw on a black belted Calvin Klein coat that completely covered the sexy, bright red Jay Godfrey satin sheath dress underneath.

"So ..." Elena says, leaning against the threshold, blocking my exit. "Who's the guy?"

"What?" I blurt, shocked that she'd come to this conclusion so quickly.

She smiles, and bats her long, thick eyelashes at me. "I used to sneak around too, you know. I know an affair when I see one. So who's the guy you're getting all dressed up for? And don't tell me it's Parker, because you just told me you weren't seeing him tonight."

I gulp, and realize I'm being cornered. "Uhm ... Well, It's ... Well, is it really that important?"

Elena squinted at me, the corners of her mouth pulling down. "Let me give you some sisterly advice, okay?"

I raise my eyebrows, "Elena, FYI, we're not really sisters-"

"Shush!" Elena snapped, her eyes darting around, then she composed herself. "Having a secret affair is a very delicate matter. I'm super apprehensive, so that's how I knew, but if you keep on with this behavior then it's going to tip mom or dad off, or worse: Parker."

I let out a small giggled, then muffled it with my hand. "Elena, darling, you honestly believe that _I _would have an affair?" I gave her an ironic look, widening my eyes innocently. "I'm sweet, innocent Bonnie. Do you understand, _sister?"_ My tone of voice sounded familiar, and I realized I was channelling Damon, of all people. I stopped short, not being able to keep the malice in my voice. I reached for the door handle and Elena stepped aside, letting me through.

Not meeting her gaze, I stepped out into the cold night air. Above, the moon was full and bloated.

Suddenly, a falcon flew over me, flapping its wings around terrifyingly, messing my hair and causing me to shriek. I threw my arms in the air and tried to scare the bird away before it ruined my curls. Mercifully, it flew away and landed on the fence. Its huge black pupils stared at me, almost accusingly.

Swallowing the lump in my throat and tightening the belt around my waist, I ran to my car and threw open the door, not looking back.

.

Le Victrola was a French-themed bar just off Highway 29. Usually, it was pretty busy. Middle-aged business men and their mistresses hit this place up all the time, so it was pretty full of perverts and cheaters. I was starting to think this wasn't such a smart choice of venue. But, then again, maybe this was good; I could pretty much bet everything I own that no one from Robert E. Lee would ever set foot in this place.

I walked into the bar, looking around for Damon. A lot of men were in here, and very few women. I could only guess that those men had come here looking for fresh meat, that's the sort of thing to expect from losers who come here. Damon and myself excluded.

Not that it wasn't gorgeous. From the classy, 30s style bar to the French-themed decor, it was pretty much socialite heaven. But the regular type of crowd put it to shame.

"Hello," drawled an older (regretfully attractive) man with whiskey breath. "You know there's plenty of beautiful women here tonight, but you're by far the most attractive."

I gazed dryly at the man, my eyes dropped to his left hand, where the mark of a missing wedding ring was still present, and then gave the man my best seductress smile. "Is that so?"

He nodded, clearly pleased with himself that I'd taken the bait. _Ha! _I thought. Just as he opened his mouth to say more, I spotted Damon. He noticed me at the same time and polished off his drink, which looked like vodka on the rocks. Or something along those lines.

"Why don't I buy you a drink, cutie?" The man asked, looking me up and down revoltingly.

I tipped my head to the side and squinted, having fun with my new toy. "I would like that ..." I saw Damon approaching from the corner of my eye. "But my _boyfriend_ wouldn't."

Damon stopped a few feet away and crossed his arms, smirking at me. I saw the look in his eyes and knew from that little look, that I'd have to find my own way out of this. I glared at him quickly before the man looked at me again.

"You're boyfriend, huh?"

I nodded, "He should be here anytime now ..." Suddenly, an idea came to me and I stepped closer to the man, much to his pleasure. "But maybe I can give you a little gift for being so kind?" I leaned in and whispered in his ear as seductively as I could. "Meet me at the Wessex Hotel parking lot; I'll be there in half an hour and we can go to my room."

Taking a step back, I saw the look in his eyes and knew he'd take the bait.

A few minutes later I was walking up to Damon, and my new friend was hastily running out to his car. "Thanks for that," I said sarcastically. "That man was a total perv-ball, you're lucky I'm ace at deception."

Damon chuckled and followed me back to the bar. I sat on a high stool, proud that I didn't have to jump to sit on it; my shoes did the job for me. "So do you have something for me?" I asked, getting down to business instantly, mainly because I didn't want to do anything I'd regret.

"Can I buy you a drink?" Damon asked, signaling the bartender.

I smiled, "I'm not old enough, Damon."

"That's exactly what you _shouldn't _be saying in a bar."

The bartender appeared in front of us, looking expectant. "Fine," I said to Damon, then looked to the bartender, "A cosmopolitan."

"Coming right up," he said, then swiftly began preparing my drink.

Damon leaned towards me secretively and I followed his lead. "What?" I whispered.

He smirked, "You realize ... that you just ordered the girliest drink ever."

The bartender set the martini glass in front of me and I replied before taking a sip. "You realize you just said 'girliest'?"

Damon smiled wide, showing off all of his teeth and I couldn't help but smile back. "Besides, it goes with my dress."

He raised his eyebrows, "The drink goes with your dress?"

I nodded matter-of-factly, and then realized I was still wearing my coat. Dramatically, I untied the belt and shrugged my coat off, exposing my red dress. I could almost feel the heat of stares from every male in the room. I looked around and caught the eyes of several middle-aged men.

I turned back to the bar and took a long sip from my martini. "Wouldn't you agree?"

"It's nice, I suppose" Damon said, throwing back his drink. He signalled the bartender and ordered another gimlet. So that's what he was drinking. "So what did you say to that guy back there that made him run away? Did you tell him you have a bomb?"

I rolled my eyes, my cheeks blazing, and then I met his gaze, "I told him to go to some motel and wait for me."

He eyed me respectfully, his dark eyes swallowing me up, making my heart warm, and I had to compose myself before I started thinking about the unthinkable. "Do you have any information for me?" I asked, changing the subject abruptly. Damon nodded and I tried to keep my eyes on my drink.

"I found something very ... interesting," Damon answered.

I looked up lightening fast, my ears perking up. "Well, spill!"

He drained his gimlet before answering, and I watched in awe. "He has a very big secret," Damon said in a rough voice.

I waited for more, but he just turned back and ordered another gimlet. "That's all you got?" I shouted, and several heads turned, but I didn't care; I was outraged. Damon Salvatore was a vampire, and probably had all sorts of connections. Hell, he could have just staked out Parker's house all day and night. "I already know he has a big secret, but thanks for your master sleuthing skills, Sherlock."

Damon chuckled, his eyelids drooping over his satiny black eyes. "That's not all I found out, birdie."

I crossed my arms. "No?"

He shook his head and rubbed his jaw, "Astonishingly, I feel telling you would be misguided."

"How do you figure?" I asked, trying to sound anguished, but it came out as no more than a whisper. Something about his tone made my heart pound, like my instincts were telling me something. My thoughts flashed to earlier this afternoon, while writing in my diary. I had written down that I had loved Damon ... maybe he had come to the same conclusion about me? I cursed at myself internally, willing myself not to hope.

Damon's eyes met mine, and I knew, in that moment, I would never be able to explain it. It looked like everything love should be, but like a great end was near. It looked hopeful, yet hopeless at the same time. Nothing would ever match that look. It nearly took my breath away.

"Because I don't want you with Parker," Damon whispered. "I don't want you with anyone else, except me."

He leaned closer, and my lips parted reflexively. I felt my heart swell times a million. My stomach filled with butter-flies. For some reason, I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. I wanted to stare at Damon forever, and I wanted to feel his strong arms around me. _Is this what love feels like? _I thought wildly.

All of my thoughts were wiped out when his lips met mine, then, there was nothing left to think about.

_.  
_

_Take a deep breath. Count to five. You can do this. It's just like playing a part: Get inside that character and make them believe it's you. C'mon, you have to do this! _

I sat in my car, in front of Parker's house on Sunday morning. I was still wearing my red dress and black coat. I was so keyed up last night that I couldn't go home and lock myself in a house. Instead I drove around all night, till I found a nice, quiet place the woods to scream and stuff. It actually made me pretty calm, calm enough to know that I could now officially dub myself a cheater.

Mad at the thought, I slammed my hands against the steering wheel. Me? A cheater? I never thought I could sink this low. According to me, this was pretty low. It made me feel yucky inside. There was only one thing I could do now.

Deciding to take the plunge, I threw the car door open and jumped out. Before I knew what I was doing, I was knocking (hard) against the Belmont's front door. I stopped after about seven knocks, resting my hand and smoothing out my hair.

The door opened slowly. My heart pounded against my chest, not in a good OMG-this-is-totally-exhilarating way, but in a bad OMG-I-hope-I-don't-die-in-the-next-fifteen-seconds way. Parker stood behind the door, but he didn't look surprised to see me, instead he leaned against the threshold easily.

For a moment, we both just stared at each other. "Hi," I squeaked.

"Hey," his voice sounded bleak, and I wondered if he'd seen this coming. "How are you faring?"

"Not so good," I admitted. Suddenly I felt like crying, it felt like if I uttered those words then I would lose him forever. I would lose my favorite guy-friend; I would lose the person who could make me laugh through tears. How could I not weep? But that wasn't the role I was supposed to be playing. I was the ruthless heart-breaker. _I'm _not supposed to be the one crying. It wasn't my fault this was happening, and it wasn't his either.

"We need to talk," I said firmly. "Can I come inside?"

"My dad's sleeping," He answered shortly and then stepped outside with his bare feet and closed the door behind him. "What do you want to talk about?"

I felt like I needed a deep breath to calm myself, but I didn't want to appear weak. Instead I bit the inside of my cheek and counted to 3. "I can't do this anymore, Parker. I can't do us. You've been great boyfriend, but it's over. Hopefully we can still be friends." I smiled, pleased with myself for getting it out. I had been working on what I would say for a couple hours now and finally saying it felt like breathing in fresh air; completely relieving.

"Why?" Parker asked, breaking my reverie.

I blanked, "What do you mean?" Then cursed myself for giving him the upper-hand; ruthless heart-breaker wouldn't have done that. "It's because I can't be with you. There's someone out there who will love you better than I ever could, I just hope you find her."

Parker looked outraged, not heartbroken. He looked ... angry. "You're really going through with it? You're really breaking up with me? After all those years I let you treat me like your pathetic stoner friend who you could give a shit about? After leaving without a note, after never even calling while you were away, after throwing me away like some god-damn used tissue-_you're breaking up with me?" _Parker shouted, spitting with each harsh syllable.

I took a step back. "I-I'm sorry, Parker. I really am. It's just-"

He seemed to have calmed down a bit, but his nostrils still flared. "You're all fine with playing a role until you don't know the next line," he spit, then whirled around and slammed the door behind him. I couldn't help the tears that streamed down my face. I turned and walked back to my car, dropping into the seat in a pathetic heap. I tried driving home, but had to pull over when the thoughts became too unbearable.

It was unbelievable what Parker said to me, about me. I had had no idea he was so angry with me, that he had all those pent-up feelings and thoughts. How long would our relationship have lasted if he kept those bottled up? Maybe I did do the right thing. But it didn't make me feel any better. You know when people say that break-ups are the hardest thing? Sometimes it's true, most of the time it isn't. I couldn't believe how hard this break-up was. He was just so-so angry with me!

I buried my face in my hands and let out a moan. After a couple minutes, I lifted my head and rifled through my purse for my Perrier water. When I came across my laptop I stopped, an idea forming in my head.

More than a few minutes later I was set up with my laptop on the passenger seat and my heart on my sleeve. I readied the play button, my other hand on RECORD. "This is for you, Parker," I whispered, trying to unleash all of my emotions. It's just like playing a part, and maybe if he hears this then he'll understand my side?

I pressed play and began to sing; only one way to find out.

.

**A/N What do you guys think? Tell me all of your thoughts on this chapter. Oh, and if you want to hear my interpretation of Bonnie's recording, copy and paste the link below! XOXO**

**Chapter Title:**

**Where I Stood by Missy Higgins**

**.  
**

http:/www (dot) youtube (dot) com/watch?v=JAD0BO2l-2k


	23. Love to Burn

**A/N Hey, guys! Thanks for all the great reviews, I love this story too :) and I'm hoping I do it some justice in this next chapter. It's probably _not _what you'd expect, and there's some Bamon action in here so if you can't handle _adult scenes _then I suggest you skip this chapter. Enjoy! Oh, and don't forget to review! What do you guys think Bonnie and Damon should sing at the Constance Peace Gala? XOXO  
**

**Chapter 22**

* * *

Soft jazz style music filtered through the door as I stepped into Damon and I's unofficial rendezvous place. A low lighting gave the building an intimate feel. Le Victrola was filled with just as many married pervs as always, but there was something magical about it tonight, something that made me feel hopeful instead of disgusted.

I shrugged off my coat off as soon as I saw Damon, secretly loving the way his dark eyes trailed up and down my body. I had worn a green Haute Hippie layered wrap halter dress. It wrapped around my body, making nonexistent desirable curves exist, and the lush green set off the deep red in my hair.

The silk fabric sashayed as I made my way to Damon.

He took a long sip of his drink, and then looked up and made eye contact with me. My heart nearly stopped, but I calmed myself with a deep breath. Damon's dark eyes watched me until I was sitting next to him, my whole body was buzzing, every bone in my body was like a live-wire.

"Hello, Damon," I breathed, the bartender appeared in front of me instantly, even though a few other people were here before me. "Pinot Noir," I ordered, smiling slightly.

The bartender smirked and winked, "Coming right up."

I turned back to Damon, and raised an eyebrow. "You don't need to do recon on Parker anymore, you're off the hook."

"Why is that?" He asked, tipping back his glass and slamming it down on the bar counter. A little shard of glass bounced away and landed near my hand. He looked at me questioningly.

After the bartender landed my drink in front of me, I spent a minute or two watching the dark spirit inside, and then answered Damon's question. "Let's just say he's not my problem anymore."

Damon tipped the melting ice cubes around in his glass. "Is that so?"

"Yes."

He suddenly stood, doing up the only button on his black suit. It was the first time I had ever really noticed what Damon was wearing, and it shocked me that I had been totally unobservant to his clothing. His styled was refined, right down from his perfectly coiffed hair to his polished black boots. He was wearing all black.

"What are you doing?" I asked, coming to my senses.

He walked past me and paused on the other side of me. A song came on overhead, it was a soft, R&B ballad, it only took me a moment to recognize it as Alexz Johnson, but my mind was elsewhere.

Damon held his hand out to me, his dark eyes sparkling. "Dance with me," he whispered.

I took his hand without hesitation and he led us onto the dance floor. He laid a tender hand on my waist, never taking his eyes off mine. I thought of all the dance lessons I had taken, hoping I'd be able to keep up with Damon. We started dancing just as the chorus began. He took my hand in his and spun me around, the dress flowing out around me, I ended back in his arms, very close to him. We moved against each other, dancing in perfect harmony with the music and each other. Damon was an amazing dancer. As the song ended, he tipped me back, leaning toward me, his face was so close I thought he was going to kiss me.

Then applause erupted all around us. Damon smirked and put me upright, leaving his arm dangling around my waist. We accepted the applause and admiring gazes, then Damon whispered in my ear, "Let's get out of here."

I nodded a little too quickly, making Damon smile, and we left the bar. We got into Damon's car and started driving down the road. It was then that I realized something. "Oh, shit!" I cursed.

"What?" Damon asked, looking startled.

"I forgot my Calvin Klein jacket!" I pouted.

Damon smirked and pulled over.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to get your jacket," He answered simply, jumping out of the Ferrari and taking off so fast he became a blur. I was only sitting there was about a minute before he was back. He was sitting in the car suddenly, holding my black jacket and wearing a devilish smirk on his face. "Got it."

Not a hair was out of place, his clothes weren't even wrinkled.

"You're my savior!" I breathed, taking my jacket and hugging it close. "This thing cost more than my first car."

"Salvatore _does_ mean savior," Damon said, his eyes twinkling.

There was a soft smile on my face as I leaned toward Damon, laying a hand on his perfect cheek. I was so close to the perfect planes of his face, that I could feel his sweat breath against my lips. "Thank you."

I leaned closer at the same time as him, and our lips met with a thirst I didn't know I had. He kissed me deeply, first kissing my lips then moving his tongue into my mouth. I kissed him back feverishly, I was practically trying to eat his face off. I brought a hand up to the back of his neck and ground his mouth into mine harder. He didn't pull back, and let me continue to devour him. He was going to have to physically pull me off because I think I could have done this for the rest of my life and never come up for air. I tore his jacket off, hungrily searching for his flawless body. His hands gripped my waist fiercely, causing pleasure instead of pain. I fumbled with the buttons of his shirt getting one undone, but failing miserably at getting the rest off. Finally, I just yanked the fabric back, breaking several buttons.

"I'll buy you a new one," I promised, my breathing ragged. My hands raked over his perfect abs, feeling the muscle beneath my palms. It nearly sent me over the edge. I wanted to feel his lean body against mine, to feel it moving under me. I climbed over onto his seat, loving the feral look on his face.

I was now straddling him, kissing him passionately, never wanting to leave his embrace. He pulled the thin green straps of my dress down, kissing my shoulder, then moving up to my neck, sucking so hard it was a physical pain, but it felt oh so good. I let out a moan, running my fingers through his silky hair. He pulled my dress down even farther …

Suddenly I got a flash of memory. A year earlier, laying in the backseat of Matts car. He pulling my dress over my shoulders, nearly exposing my breasts. Then there was a loud bang on the roof, we both looked up in shock. A million thoughts ran through my mind, but I never expected Michael to be there. His face was heartbroken, and I remembered the little crush he had on me. I righted my dress and sat up, Matt lifted himself too, but by the time we looked back to the window, Michael was gone.

"We have to go after him!" I cried.

Matt wiped his mouth, looking angry. "He shouldn't even be out here! Did he follow us?"

"How am I supposed to know?" I snapped, fixing my hair, looking out the backseat window for Michael. "Did you see where he went?"

"No, he's probably going home," Matt said, and after a moment I figured he was right.

"Did you see his face?" I mumbled, hating myself in that moment. "He was... heartbroken. We never should have done this." Matt met my eyes, the wind howled outside, I saw Michaels crushed expression on Matt's face as he nodded, agreeing with me.

"We never should have done this," I whispered now, a year later. Damon stopped, his hands resting on my shoulders.

"What?" His face was confused.

"Wait, be quiet," I ordered, fixing my dress and looking around outside. I didn't see anyone behind the car, but that didn't mean he wasn't there. I searched all around the car.

"What are you doing, Bonnie? There's no one out there."

Finally, I spotted someone in a tiny, beat up blue car. I pointed just as they were driving away. My heart sank. Oh god, not again.

"Who's that?" Damon asked, wrapping his arms around me protectively.

I swallowed hard, feeling tears spring to my eyes for some unexplainable reason. "Parker."

.

"We need you downstage, Tyler. Bonnie, you enter from the balcony on the count of five." Miss Sherman called from her spot at the edge of the stage. I had to hand it to her; anyone else would have been frazzled under the pressure, but she handled it like a pro.

Tyler struts to his marker, and you can tell he's going through his lines in his head. I climb the ladder up the balcony, which is a bit rickety under my body weight, and wait in the wings.

Miss S tilted her head, looking at the scene before her with an expert eye. "Claudia, get the boys in props to move the trees to the far right instead of the center—put more focus on our Romeo."

Claudia nodded, writing the note frantically on her clipboard. "Of course, Miss Sherman, you're absolutely right."

"Alright," Miss S called, clapping her hands twice. "Everyone in position, on three..." Then she looked over her shoulder at Claudia, who was still standing there. "Well, off you go," Miss S said to her, shooing her away.

I muffled a giggle. Miss S looked back at us, giving me a wink, and then she was all business. "Act 2, scene 3. One ... two ... three."

_ Let the show begin. _

Tyler lets out a small, choking sound from the back of his throat, and then begins in a deep tone. I start counting to five in my head. "He jests at scars that never felt a wound," and then I enter from above at the sound of Tyler's voice, looking down at 'Romeo'. "But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun—"

But before Tyler could finish his monologue, the doors of the auditorium burst open. From each door, two policemen came in. From the hall, bright red and blue lights shone through the windows. They stomped straight down the carpeted path ... headed for ... _me._

"Bonnie McCullough?" The policeman in front asked, his loud voice booming throughout the whole auditorium, his hard eyes looking through the scatter of students on and around the stage.

"She's right here!" Caroline shouted, pointing up at me.

I was so horrified that I couldn't move, my fingers turned white gripping the balcony. Thankfully, Miss S came to my rescue. "What is this concerning, Officer?"

The gruff police officer meets my eyes, showing no mercy. "The murder of Michael Honeycutt."

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Love to Burn by Alexz Johnson (R&B Version)**


	24. Safe and Sound

**Chapter 23**

* * *

In the distance, a woman cried out for her daughter, sounding insane and drunk. Guards yelled, their powerful voices echoing through the narrow prison. There was a putrid smell in the air; like copper and stale urine. The harsh bang of wooden batons against the steel cages they keep us in. The dim light flickering every now and then, the touch of cold hands as the medics fill me with some sort of pain killer, because without the painkillers I would never sleep, or probably die of depression before I could serve my ten years—this was what my life had come to.

It had been weeks, maybe months, since my trial was held. Just to think, a couple months ago I had been Queen, ruling the halls of Robert E. Lee High School. Everyone had admired me, now I was reduced to a pathetic prison in-mate, stuffed so full of morphine the days began to blur together.

I sat cross legged on the thin cotton mattress, waiting. Waiting for what? I didn't know.

Elena had come to see me the other day... or maybe it was just this morning. She had whispered frantically to me, her pretty face obscured by the shadows of the prison. Her voice was thick with tears, "I'm going to get you out of here, Bonnie. I promise." Then she looked around, searching for guards. When she looked back at me her eyes had a thin layer of water on them. "Listen, Damon and I have a plan."

I stared at her blankly for a long time until the guards ushered her away. It didn't matter what Damon and Elena were trying to do; no one believed me anyway.

On the day of my trial, wearing my most professional and complimenting suit, it was a cold and windy day. Damon had offered to pick me up, but I insisted that we take separate cars. When I got to the Parliament Building, the large marble steps were lined with reporters. My mother squeezed my hand, assuring me she would always be on my side. Damon was waiting on the steps for me, turned away from the reporters in the most natural way; you'd think he was used to it. His presence, waiting for me there, was what gave me the strength to get out of the car and climb those steps.

But the next few hours were torture.

Not only did they have proof that I had an apparent grudge against Michael, but they had an eye-witness that I had been with him that night.

When they called Matt to the stand, I had been so sure that he was going to defend me, so sure that years of friendship would be far greater than some bribery. But whatever we had clearly wasn't enough. He fed the court-room a story, about how Michael had been in love with me, about how he had jeopardized my quest for domination in High School, about how I was obsessed with power, about how I would never let anyone get in my way. He gave them my apparent motive.

Next on the stand was Caroline. Tears were already threatening in my eyes when they called her to the stand. She didn't look at me once. Her cat-like green eyes stared at the back of the court-room the whole time my lawyer was questioning her. She confirmed Matt's story. Confirmed that I was a horrible, popularity hungry person.

I was surprised to see Miss Sherman called to the bench. After they swore her in, she gave me a sober look and proceeded with telling the jury that I had put popularity before myself at times, and that it seemed like I would always put my popularity before anyone.

By this time, my tears had long-since dried. Miss Sherman's final verdict was being recorded, and it was official; I had lost. When they called Parker to the stand, I decided I couldn't bare it anymore. Thankfully, I didn't have to. After a few more calls, it was decided that Parker was absentee and his claims would be recorded at a later period.

Court was adjourned for that day.

The next day both of the lawyers, mine and the Honeycutt's lawyer, would speak to the jury and call what few witnesses were left. Parker's testimony was recorded and reviewed by the jury. They'd had no solid proof that I had killed Michael; they couldn't sentence me for homicide. It had seemed like I would get away clean.

Until a few days later when the police department got a call, saying a body had turned up. Lo and behold, Michael's body had finally been discovered in the creek behind my house. He had been stabbed through the heart with a knife. What surprised everyone, especially me, was that my fingerprints were on the knife.

Finally, the Honeycutt's lawyer had reasonable proof that I had killed Michael Honeycutt. And so I was sentenced to ten years on manslaughter.

Now here I was, sitting in a dank prison cell, only with my memories to keep my going. Through the sweet haze of morphine, I suddenly felt Damon's arms around me, his gentle voice whispering into my ear, feeling his body against mine.

When the morphine left my veins, and I was coherent enough to realized my actual situation; that I was alone in the cold cell, made a murderer by society, is when I would start screaming, start trying to get out of my own skin. That's when the medics would come with the morphine, and I would succumb to my sweet oblivion once again.

Damon came to visit me the next day. When I saw him, I stood so fast the morphine knocked me back down. I heard Damon Compelling the guards to let him into my cell. In the next moment, Damon was beside me, stroking my hair, kissing my lips, whispering sweet nothings to me, giving me drinks of weird tasting water. There was nothing else in the world except Damon.

When the guards came to tell him it was time to leave, he turned to me one last time. "Sweet dreams, Bonnie. I promise when you wake up, you'll be in a better place. I love you."

I slipped into oblivion again, except this time it wasn't filled with wonderful dreams of Damon; it was utterly black, and twice as painful. When I woke up the world was sparkling.

.

**A/N I don't even know how to write an Authors Note for this chapter. Clearly a lot has happened between this chapter and the last. Tell me what y'all think in a little review, even if you didn't like it! Also, I highly encourage listeningto the beautiful song below that helped me write this chapter. :3 Thanks for reading and thanks for all of the 103 reviews! _*Insert Happy Dance Here*_ **

**If y'all have any question, please feel free to PM me. ESPECIALLY if you have any ideas for upcoming chapters! Hugs and Kisses - Simmy**

**Chapter Title:**

**Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift featuring The Civil Wars (The Hunger Games Soundtrack)**


	25. Dark Paradise

**Hey, guys! This chapter is one of my favorites and it was really fun to write! Bonnie goes through some major character development here and a lot of questions are answered. Unfortunately, this story is nearing it's end, but I promise more stories are to come. Also, I strongly encourage listening to the beautiful song that inspired this chapter. **

**If you have any questions or concerns regarding this chapter, throw me a PM or just wait until the following chapters, because I swear your questions will be answered in the conclusion. Enjoy! Love you guys. XOXO  
**

**Chapter 24**

* * *

****_A few more moments and she'll wake up. Just a few more minutes. She'll wake up, she has to. _

The beautiful voice pulled me from the brink of darkness. This voice wasn't spoken aloud, it was whispered through the mind. I was connected to him somehow. I tried to open my eyes, to tell him I was alive, that I would do anything for him. Something was weighing me down, stopping my eyes from opening. My eyelids were sparkling, the red almost glittering. Was this wrong? Or was I in transition into something evil? Did Damon make me a vampire? Who was I now?

Damon's voice floated back into my thoughts, _If she doesn't wake up, then she's dead because of me._

I heard someone pacing nearby, sounding more aggravated than anything. Their hands swung impatiently at their sides, swirling the dust motes in the air back and forth. I could hear everything. From the light pace, it sounded like a woman. Elena, most likely. Her soft leather boots ground the loose dirt into the concrete floor.

Damon's voice spoke aloud, addressing Elena fiercely. "You're not helping."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Elena said, her voice piercing the quite. Her voice sounded absolutely wicked, more like Katherine than herself. "_I'm _not the one who didn't follow the plan. The plan was go in, distract the guards, and _I _would get her out! God dammit, Damon. You're so frustrating."

A feral snarl rolled out from Damon's lips. "I told you the guards were wearing vervain. Parker was one step ahead of us."

My ears perked up to the sound of Parker's name.

"He's always one step ahead of us these days," Elena mumbled, sounding exasperated. "Feel her pulse, he'll be here any minute."

Suddenly Damon's cool fingers were on the curve of my wrist, pressing lightly. A moment passed, then for the slightest second, his hand was cupping my face, smoothing curls away from my face. "Come back to me, Bonnie. I know you can hear me. Come back to me," He repeated.

_I can't... I don't know how, _I thought.

Damon waited a second longer, waited for me to respond. But I couldn't. I didn't know if he could hear my thoughts, or if I could just hear his. How did that make sense? How can I wake up so I can ask these questions?

"Come back to me ..." He whispered.

Think, Bonnie, think. A memory came to mind, Stefan appeared. He was looking at me sincerely, almost testing the waters. There was something about his voice that had alerted me, something that made me think he was keeping a secret. His voice rang clear '_I'll be looking out for you, Bonnie …' _I had thought he was worrying about Damon.

Suddenly another memory surfaced. I was with Stefan again. Turning away from me, his vibrant green eyes piercing into mine. There was something there that I hadn't understood, something that made me think he knew more than he let on. His eyes raked over my face, trying to read into something far greater. '_I know more than you think.' _He had said. Had something already been put into action then? How much did Stefan know? What was he keeping from us?

Maybe, somewhere deep inside me, I had always known Stefan was a key piece in this puzzle. That explained why it had been so hard for me to let him go, and why he had always been on my mind when I was with Damon or Parker.

One thing was for certain in the moment; Stefan knew more than he let on. And I had to find out what it was before it was too late. Who knew what Parker might do next? He had already turned my friends against me, isolated me, and got me thrown in jail, made everyone believe I had killed Michael.

Stefan hadn't been at my trial. Where had he been these days, anyway?

Why would Parker be messing with my life? It made absolutely no sense. He had loved me, the key word being _had. _Everything with Parker had seemed fine until … Until I kept choosing things over him. First it was leaving him to go to California, then it was choosing Stefan over him. After he finally had me, he didn't want me to stray too far. It was clear. Then when I broke up with him, seemingly for Damon, it must have been the breaking point. He had reached the brink of his sanity when I had chosen someone over him again. It had been the last straw.

But why would Matt, Caroline and Meredith be so quick to turn against me? Maybe Parker had something against them? Something didn't fit…

Then Damon suddenly stood, whipping around so fast the air around him barely moved. "He's coming; I can hear him."

Elena's heartbeat picked up the pace, but her voice was controlled. "Quick, move her into the shadows."

I heard footsteps coming down a long shaft, like a tunnel. Where were we? From the heavy footfalls, it sounded like a man. He was breathing roughly, from exertion, I presume. Then it must not be a vampire. My heartbeat quicken at the thought of Parker coming to meet Elena and Damon.

Suddenly the footsteps stopped just shy of our cave. "Is-is anyone there?"

Matt? Why would Matt be here? My head spun with a hundred possibilities.

"Yes, Matt, we're here," said Elena. "Show yourself."

Two steps to the right, a loud intake of breath. "I'm not scared of you. Parker told me what you guys were trying to do. I couldn't let that happen. Not after what she put my family through. We know you have her and if you don't let me take her, I'll go to the police."

"Now, Mutt, you can't honestly believe a word that comes out of that lying fool's mouth, can you?" Damon's ironical voice rang through the tunnel eerily, sending shivers down my spine.

"I don't know what to believe. But I know the facts. And the fact is- she killed my brother."

"She didn't do it, Matt. She was framed." Elena said in a soft voice, trying to coax him out of hiding. "You know Bonnie. The _real _Bonnie. She would never hurt anyone, especially not Michael. She loved you and your family too much to ever-"

"To ever put us to shame? She put the whole town to shame when that knife was found. Now you're trying to tell me she was framed?" He scoffed. "You're never going to win. She was marked the second she ran away."

My heart gave a sudden jerk, shocking me back to life. Something about what Matt said, something about the way he said it, reminded me of something.

Damon was beside me, holding me upright. "Bonnie?"

I opened my eyes slowly and met beautiful onyx black eyes. A smile spread onto my face so fast I didn't even think to stop it. "Damon …"

Matt crept closer, leaning over to get a look at me. I could see his shocking blue eyes over Damon's shoulder. The sight of him, looking at me with such an intensely accusing stare, brought tears to my eyes.

"She's a little incoherent," Elena explained to Matt, leaning closer to him.

He jumped back, looking at all three of us. "I'm not scared of you," he repeated.

"But you should be," Damon said, looking over his shoulder at him. "And so should Parker. Do you hear that?" He shouted towards the tunnel.

Damon stood, pulling me up with him and holding me close. "Now go. And tell your _master_ that we're not going down without a fight."  
Matt took one last look at me, then took off down the tunnel.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and spoke aloud. "Damon, what is Parker? What is he _really_?"

Damon met my eyes. "A vampire. Just like me and my brother, and just like you."

"What did you just say?" My breath caught in my throat and I detached myself from him. The room was suddenly spinning. "I-I can't be a _vampire, _Damon. I'm Bonnie McCullough, 17 year old high school senior, Queen of Robert E. Lee."

His eyes showed no sympathy. "Not anymore. You can never be that girl again."

My heart sunk to the floor. I looked at Elena, demanding an explanation with my eyes, but she only looked away. "What do you think you've accomplished here? You got me out of prison. That's fantastic. But if I can't go back to my old life then none of it matters-!"

"You can't go back, Bonnie," Elena whispered.

I paused, catching my breath. "What?"

Elena's eyes were sad. "I'm so sorry, Bonnie, but there's nothing we can do. There's no way to clear your name; Parker made sure of that. Even if we could clear your name, nothing could repair the damage it has done. Do you think anyone at school would even meet your eyes if you went back? Your family moved away to Richmond after your trial because of the gossip, the real Katherine is dead, Meredith and Caroline have gone rogue. You can't go back."

I sank down to the floor, feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. Tears streamed down my face. Nothing could explain the agony ripping through my chest. Have you ever had your life just taken away from you? Torn from your fingers, without a warning or a reason? There's a crushing feeling. The depression needles its way into your bones, hopelessness courses through your veins.

In that moment, I knew Elena was right. There was no going back. I could never be that Bonnie that everyone said hi to in the halls again. I would never have margarita's with Meredith and Caroline again and gab about boys. I would never have to worry about ruling my kingdom. All of that had been taken away from me.

Who was I now?

Damon touched my arm gently, resting his hand there.

Feeling his presence there, knowing he was with me through this, made me feel a tiny bit better. It lit a spark in me. I wasn't completely hopeless. I still had one thing worth fighting for; revenge.

I turned to Damon, letting the anger completely engulf me. I could feel the wicked smirk on my face, feel my eyes lighting up with fire, and I could see my own reflection in Damon's eyes. "Let's get back at the bitch."

.

Walking down the dark street, I could almost feel the night enveloping me. How beautiful the night could be when you weren't twisted up in some sort of drama! The moon, the stars, the trees and nightlife. Truly extraordinary.

My footsteps only made the slightest noise as I padded along the sidewalk. Leafs gently made their way across the street. In the distance, a dog howled, adding a sort of eery feeling. The air smelled like lightly burning leafs. It was my kind of night.

Then suddenly something in the atmosphere shifted. I felt eyes on my back, the slightest chill ran down my spine. I whipped around, seeing nothing. I turned on my night senses, searching for any sign of Power.

"Who's there?" I called to the empty street.

"Stefan," A bell-like voice whispered against my neck.

I turned around at lightening speed. Standing directly behind me, looking fierce yet somehow sweet, was Bonnie. She held her petite frame with new found stature. There was something remarkably different …

My breath caught in my throat. "You're a vampire!"

Bonnie smirked slightly. "Oh, yes. Stefan, I don't have much time. You have to tell me what you know about Parker and his plan."

"H-how did you?... Wait, what?" I was floundering to keep up. "Who changed you?"

"Why, I did, brother," Damon's voice floated from behind me. I turned and met his wicked eyes. "Don't look so surprised. I believe my Bonnie asked you a question."

"Stefan," Bonnie called me back. "Stefan, we need your help."

I shook my head, trying to collect my thoughts. "I-I know Parker is a vampire. He framed you for Michaels murder but... but Michael isn't dead."

Bonnie met Damon's eyes over my shoulder, communicating some sort of message with him. "Do you know where Michael is?"

I shook my head. "No."

"How do you know this, brother?" Damon asked.

I looked to him, feeling cornered. "I overheard Parker ..." I looked back to Bonnie, "discussing his plans with Katherine."

She rose her chin slightly. "Katherine?"

"Yes."

Bonnie walked closer and looked into my eyes with her huge brown ones. "Stefan, if you know anything else, it would be wise to tell me. Please, Stefan."

I shook my head, feeling somewhat entranced with her. "I don't know anything else."

Bonnie stepped around me and trotted up to Damon. "Then we're done here."

In the next second they were gone.

.

**Chapter Title:**

**Dark Paradise by Lana Del Ray**


	26. Cough Syrup

**Chapter 25**

* * *

Gravel crunched under my soft black boots as I sat cross-legged on the worn-out afghan. I had managed to sneak back to my old home one last time to steal little things that wouldn't be missed. Like a few good pieces of clothing, candles, an old afghan, a couple of books, my corral Marc Jacobs hobo bag, and a picture of me and my family.

I looked around the abandoned house. It was small, with cracks in the walls. Above, half the ceiling was torn away and there was a small loft that looked ready to collapse.

I set the unlit candles around myself, staring at the wick in front of me. My pale fists clenched, holding on to white knuckles. They were the only thing keeping me from screaming in the dim shack. Those same pale hands ran viciously through beautiful, curly, ruby red locks of hair. I bit my lip, biting hard enough to draw blood. Finally, unable to contain it any longer, I let out a loud, guttural scream, letting loose all my anger. Anger for Elena, anger for Parker, anger for my human friends, Meredith, Matt and Caroline.

How did I end up here? Why would my friends do this to me?

I stood quickly, turning her back towards the small, dusted shack. It was cozy and just far enough away from town that no one would think to come here. I had found this place after departing from Damon.

Dropping Damon's hand, I had turned away from him and looked up at the bloated moon. "I need to be alone for a moment," I had mumbled, crossing my arms tightly over my chest.

"Of course," Damon agreed, brushing the small of my back before planting a soft kiss on my forehead. "If anything should happen, do not hesitate to Call on me."

"I won't," I had whispered.

Suddenly I heard a flicker behind me. I listened more closely, but only heard a slight ruffle. Turning swiftly, my eyes instantly landed on the six candles I had set around my afghan on the dusty floor. My breath caught in my throat; the candles were lit. All six of them were suddenly burning bright.

My mouth popped open in shock as I looked around the small, dusty, cold house. "Hello?" No response. "I know you're in here!" I screamed, my hands shaking at my sides. I was feeling hurt that my friends let this happened to me, and terrified that someone might be messing with me right now, and blended together they tasted like anger.

I turned towards the door, ready to bolt and letting my anger lead me. Suddenly I heard a snap from behind me. When I turned back around, the flames of the candles were gone; little trails of smoke leaving the blackened wick.

"I demand you show yourself!" I yelled at the empty room.

I took a step towards the candles, ready to examine the scene of the crime, when the candles burst with flames. When the smoke cleared, all six candles were, once again, lit.

Quickly, I whipped out my cell phone and dialed Damon. Instantly, he picked up. "Damon, I need you to get over here."

Almost in no time, Damon was standing beside me. "That's not that I meant by Calling," Damon mumbled, his brilliant black eyes assessing the scene.

I slipped my cold hand into his, trying to conceal how terrified I really was, even though I was shaking visibly. I squeezed his hand tighter, grateful when the same pressure was returned. "We have plenty of time ahead of us for you to teach me how to use my Powers," I said, my voice shaking. "Right now I have a problem … I think."

"What's the problem?" Damon asked.

Letting out a loud breath, I instructed him to watch closely.

I lifted one foot, thinking about all my pent-up anger and hurt. Katherine had been conspiring against me. My parents didn't care enough to look for me, but they spent days looking for Katherine. Caroline, Meredith and Matt- they had all abandoned me, betrayed me. My fists clenched tight, tears stinging in my eyes. I dropped my foot, feeling Power rush through my limbs.

And the candles burst into flames.

I stumbled back a few paces, right into Damon's arms. "Did you see it? I'm not crazy!" I cried. Then I turned to Damon and clung to the supple leather of his jacket. "What does this mean?"

"It means you have far greater Power than either of us imagined," Damon muttered breathlessly, his eyes full of wonder as they raked over me, almost drinking me in.

Damon's face was so perfect, even with the pale light of the candles casting a faint orange glow on the right side of his face. The left side of his face was covered by a soft shadow. His hand ran smoothly against my cashmere sweater, resting on the small of my back.

I was frozen, unsure of what to do, but somehow knowing what was going to happen next. "Damon ..." I whispered, my hands relaxing against his chest, bringing my face closer to his.

Then, Damon leaned down, and pressed his soft pink lips against mine.

"Isn't this nice?" A malicious voice called.

Damon and I broke apart, both of us turning towards the opening in the old shack. Elena was leaning against the door, wearing a small smile on her lovely face.

"Elena, hey." I breathed, a little annoyed. Elena had perfect timing, didn't she? "What are you doing here?"

Elena's dark blue eyes flickered between Damon and me, her rose-tinted lips set in a taut line. "Your parents sent out a search party for you, Bonnie. They're a mess; they think you've been kidnapped. It's all anyone's talking about."

My heart skipped a beat. My parents were sending out a search party? I imagined my mothers face; worry lines more prominent, her light brown eyes filled with pain. All I ever wanted was my mothers love and attention, now that's what I had, and I was a vampire. There was no more going back; I could never go home. I needed to put the old Bonnie to rest, otherwise I would never be able to do what needed to be done.

I swallowed hard, ignoring the pinch behind my eyes. "We have to help them move on," I croaked, not even caring how coarse my voice sounded. "Maybe-maybe we can fake my death or something. Anything. They don't have to suffer because of this."

"Bonnie," Elena said firmly. "Calm down-"

"Don't tell me to calm down, Elena," I snapped, squinting hard at her. "You have no idea what this is like for me. I'm losing _everything._" All of a sudden I inhaled sharply, like I had been struck by a whip. It felt like something mighty was bearing down on me. Little prickles of heat met my skin, and suddenly I felt so isolated, so trapped. Without another word, I bolted from the little shack.

At first, my speed left me breathless, but I kept running. I needed to get away from Damon and Elena and the town, at least for now. I kept running, picking up speed, getting so fast the trees blurred. Then it became easy, instinctual. I dodged plants, jumping over fallen trees and chased deer. Laughing when I passed them.

Then something stopped me in my tracks. I smelled something in the air, a foreign smell that didn't belong in the deep greenery of the Virginian woods. I waited for a gust of wind to bring the smell my way again. It was coming from my left. I turned and darted towards the smell. Thankfully, it didn't seem to sense me. I came up behind it, stepping into a clearing carefully.

Instantly, my eyes landed on a figure standing on a huge rock up ahead. It occurred to me that me and the stranger were on a cliff, if I were still human I would be worried about falling off. The only difference was that I knew how to easily avoid death, now. It was mere instincts. I studied the figure, wondering if it knew I was here. It was wearing a black sweater with the hood pulled up. I couldn't tell from behind, but it looked like a man.

If I could just see the person's face, I would know. I took a step to the right, my feet somehow avoiding the little, breakable twigs on the ground. I could tell from the person's stillness, that it was a vampire. Even without making any sound, it should know I was here. I wondered what it was waiting for.

Finally, I decided to speak up, but then the person turned and my words caught in my throat. "Parker!" I gasped, stumbling backwards, into another, hard figure. I looked over my shoulder and met vibrant blue eyes. I gasped again, nearly fainting with surprise. "Michael!"

It was all too much. Parker watched me with a slight, wicked smile on his face. "Hello, Bonnie," He greeted me pleasantly. "I'm so glad we could catch you."

Something about the way he said this, made me think they had been hunting me for a while. "H-how is this possible?" I asked, watching Michael as he stepped around me and went to Parker. My hands shook. "This is... impossible."

Parker cocked his head to the side. "Poor, little, Bonnie. Haven't you learned that anything is possible?" He chuckled softly.

My lips parted, unable to form a response. Finally I bit my lip and gazed at the boys, standing side by side. That's really what they were; boys. Michael studied me, too; his eyebrows creased in consternation, her lips set in a taut line. I planted my feet solidly on the ground. I must be stronger than them; Damon had said just that in the shack. I was sure I could take them, if it came to that … or at least run fast enough. "Tell me what's going on, Parker."

"You haven't figured it out already?" Parker asked, smiling widely and shaking his head, as if I was the pettiest thing. "Oh, alright, I suppose the jig is up, now. You see, I was born in the 1930s to a very strict man. My mother had died giving birth to me, the youngest of my siblings. He never liked me or my brothers and sisters. Every now and then he would show us exactly what he was made of." Parker's jaw clenched, and he got this far off look in his eye. "One night, he got so angry that he actually killed one of us. Me. I was only sixteen." Parker looked at me sadly, with a sick glint in his eyes. "What my father didn't know, was how strong a child's hate could grow. Right before my father killed me, I made a deal with a very dangerous man. I told this man about my hate and my thirst for revenge against my father. The man gave me a drink of his own blood, and sent me on my way, giving me instructions to pray to the Devil each night until my inevitable death.

"When I finally got my wish, I was more prepared than ever." Parker was becoming more and more intense; his hands shook and his bottom teeth stuck out slightly. "After I was buried, I came back to life with a vengeance. My first victim was the blacksmiths wife who I seen once striking a poor boy for picking through her garbage. The next, was my father," he said with such cruelty that I took a step back. Parker suddenly laughed, showing no remorse. "You really should have seen his face, Bonnie; it was hilarious."

I started at him in disgust.

"Oh, right! You want to know why I'm hurting you and your loved ones, am I right?" His eyes glittered. Michael crossed his arms over his slight chest.

I nodded cautiously.

"Well, as you can probably tell, when I decide to do something, I usually get my way. And when I decide I want someone …" he looked up at me from under his lashes, his eyes black with determination. "Then if I can't have her, no one else will."

My brain ran in overtime, all the details suddenly falling into place. "That's why you sent me to jail. How did you turn my friends against me?" He raised one eyebrow. "Right, Compulsion, of course. Why did you need Elena in Fells Church? Why not leave her out of it?"

His eyebrows creased. "Elena? She was never a part of the plan. It _did _come as a shock to me when she showed up as Katherine, though I let bygones be bygones."

"And what about him?" I asked, jerking my chin towards Michael Honeycutt, the boy I supposedly murdered 7 months ago.

The corners of Parker's lips quirked up. "It's amazing how easy it is to trick the humans, isn't it? All I had to do was get a body that looked enough like Michael from across the globe, make it look like you murdered him and then... Tada! Mission accomplished."

"But … but how did Michael get involved?" I asked, unable to comprehend it. "If you wanted me all to yourself, then why pretend to kill Michael instead of Matt?"

Parker's eyebrows rose. I noticed for the first time that his eyes were unclouded. "And if you're a vampire, then how can it look like you're stoned? I mean, does that stuff work on vampires?"

"So many questions!" Parker exclaimed, seeming pleased. "You're taking this all exceptionally well. When I told Katherine it took her _days _to take it it." He eyed me appreciatively.

I glared at him vehemently. "I guess I'm just a little more desperate to believe. Now answer the questions."

He chuckled. "Okay, okay. Now … between Michael and Matt, which of the two do you think Fells Church would miss less?"

I thought about it. Matt was on Varsity football, track and pretty much every sport Fells Church had to offer. If he went missing, they definitely would have broken their backs looking.

"Bingo!" Parker said, watching my expressions change. "Nobody would miss little Michael more than Matty. So I chose Michael. It gave me more time, you see, to construct my plan. Of course, I wasn't planning on keeping Michael around, but he proved himself useful. He knew how to get into Matt's head easily, knew your class schedule, got Katherine on our side with his boyish charm, and know he got you here. I think Michael deserves a round of applause, don't you?"

While Parker clapped, I watched Michael's face. He had been staring down at the ground this whole time, the dip between his eyebrows becoming more and more pronounced. I wanted to ask him if he wanted to be here, helping Parker, but I knew his response wouldn't matter. He's already done so much to assist Parker, there was no going back for him now. He had crossed over to the dark side.

"Now, onto your second question. I appear to be on drugs occasionally because that is the time when I am most thirsty. After I feed, my eyes are more clear blue. I have no idea why this is and neither does my creator. Does that answer your question?"

"Why are you telling me all of this?" I asked, my lips barely moving. A thought occurred to me. "I could just go right back to Elena and Damon and tell them everything. We won't take this laying down; we _will _have our revenge."

"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure," Parker said, his expression suddenly morphing into a harsher, crueler mask than the one I was used to. His eyes turned dark blue. "If I can't have you, no one can. You're very unique, Bonnie. Especially as a vampire. Your Powers exceed your strength. I bet you haven't even learned how to use them yet, have you?"

I didn't answer.

He smirked wickedly. "Just as I thought. You're in no position to fight me, nor Michael. At least not at this moment."

I searched his eyes, testing to see if he was waiting till my guard was down to attack me. When I found nothing but compromise in them, I sighed. "What do you propose we do, then, Parker?"

Parker took a step towards me slowly, like a hunter approaching a baby deer, afraid to spook it. "Bonnie, I would like you to leave Fells Church and never come back. Ever."

My back stiffened; I hadn't seen this coming. A painful sensation started in my brain, but I fought past it. "And what if I don't?"

He took another step towards me, an evil glint entering his eyes. "I think we both know the answer to that question. I'll hunt down your loved ones, bind them, and then kill them in the most painful, slow way possible right before your eyes. Your mother and father, Caroline, Meredith, Matt, Elena, Damon. I'll make sure you hear their screams in your nightmares until you wish you had suffered the same fate."

My heartbeat kicked into overtime. I listened to Parker's words getting farther and farther away, as if he were walking down a long tunnel. Two white dots appeared in front of my eyes and I tasted bile in the back of my throat. To my left, the sun rose, glinting off Parker's sparkly white canines. I didn't know if he could go through with what he was promising, of if that was in his power, but something told me he wouldn't stop until he had gotten his way. It was instinctual.

My breathing came in rasps, my heart felt sick. Parker watched all of this with sick amusement, with an almost perverse look in his eyes.

"Please," I whispered, barely making a sound. I worked to make my voice stronger. "Please, don't. Don't hurt them."

Parker smiled wider. "I won't hurt them," he assured me. "All you have to do is leave and never come back. Forget about your life here, forget about everyone. Otherwise, you'll have marked them for death. How does that sound?"

Horrible. Painful. Evil. "I'll do it," I said before I could stop myself.

Parker raised his eyebrows, as if not believing his ears. Something about his expression told me he was hoping that I had tried to protect them, just so he could hear their please. "Off you go, then."

I turned away, not caring that I was leaving my back unprotected. I stepped out of the clearing, turning my back on Fells Church and Parker. I began running again, leaving my heart behind with the rest of me. I didn't know where I would go, what I would do, or if I could stay away, but I knew I could never put anyone I loved in danger. Especially not Damon.

Finally, I had found someone to love and someone to love me back. Someone who had enough fire within them to keep me alight, someone who would never be boring or dull; someone forever changing. It had taken a lot to find out, but I was here. I was sure I could never love anyone more than I loved Damon.

That was all I could be sure of. It was all I had.

At least, for now.

.

**A/N This is the last chapter of this novel, but there will be more exciting new stories to come. If you have any questions or concerns, I urge you to PM me. Please leave a review, telling me your thoughts. And also, I'm thinking about writing a sequel for this story, or maybe adding on. What do you guys think? Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!**

**.**

**Chapter Title:**

**Cough Syrup by Young The Giant **


	27. Does This Always Happen?

**A/N I decided to come back to this due to a very dreary rainy day. This completes the story a little more. I'm not promising I won't add on later, but I felt this chapter needed to be done. Thanks for reading. Please review. :) xxx**

**Chapter 26**

* * *

Numbly, I trailed through the darkness of night. My fingers met the roughness of tree bark, dampened by cold. Almost as cold as my heart felt. I tried to tame the hatred I felt towards Parker and everyone else. Logically, I knew I should only want to kill Parker, but the revenge deep inside my heart told me otherwise. They all deserved to die for ruining my life. Meredith, Caroline, Matt, Michael. The whole lot of them.

Slowly, it began to rain. Drip by drip. As I roamed further into the forest, though, it began to snow. Big, fat flakes that stuck on my eyelashes. I blinked them away, along with angry tears.

After a while I came to a cliff. Closing my eyes, I stepped forward. Cold air rushed around me, biting my face, until I hit the ground with a thud. Snow whirled all around me. The beauty of it was not lost on me, and just seeing it; the hope, the sereneness, made me weep. I sunk to the cold ground, head bowed.

That's when I heard it. The soft thud of footsteps coming towards me. The crunch of snow, the shift of tree branches. I hardly have the sense to care. I sit there, unmoving.

"You don't think I'd let you get away that easily, do you?" Parker says in my ear.

I run at full speed away from him, turning to face him. "You said to leave!"

"You shouldn't have stopped."

Then all I see is Parker's sinister blue eyes and his wicked smirk as he drives a stake through my heart. I sink to the cold ground, but all I can feel is the pain of the stake. I don't cry, I don't scream. It would only please him. Instead I watch silently as he walks away.

Why am I not dead yet? I feel life draining from my veins.

Then he comes into view. Damon. Dressed in the same closed I left him with. A little ruffled and covered in snow, but otherwise unscathed. When he sees me he's horrified, running towards me. His eyes full with tears, he grips the stake, touching the bloody skin around it.

"No, no, no," he cries. Then lets out a cry of pain. "Not her... not her..."

"I've been looking for you everywhere," I whisper.

He looks up, shocked to see me still awake. He smiles at this small victory but it's moot.

I touch his face, tears leaking from my eyes. "I'm dying."

Damon shakes his head. A small part of me registers how odd it is to see him cry. I've never seen him more vulnerable than he is now.

"Is this real?" I ask. Surely Parker wouldn't allow me this piece of happiness. I'm staring into his jewel black eyes. These same eyes haunted my dreams, fulfilled my fantasy's, made me _feel _something.

His frozen fingers are holding my face, tracing every detail.

"Of course it's real, Bonnie," he whispers. "I never compelled you. It was all real."

Then his mouth is on mine and I'm so blissfully complete. It's such a relief to have his lips on mine once more, to feel his arms around me. It was like I would never see the sun again. Always be missing a piece of me. Deep down I knew I couldn't take him with me, but I couldn't face that right now. Because now he's cradling me, kissing my hair, whispering my name.

"Bonnie..." he whispers. "Bonnie, I love you."

"Thank you ... That's all I wanted..." I answer, staring up at the grey sky. A bright light blocks most of my view. Something almost like sleep drags me under. Then Damon's face is back.

"I'm not letting you go," He grips me tighter to his chest.

"You must…" I tell him breathlessly. "You can't come with me."

Damon's hand closes around the stake, kissing the top of my head. "I promise I'll avenge you, Bonnie. Then I won't be far behind."

"I love you," I whisper, breathing in his delicious scent for the last time. My lips form the beautiful words until I'm out of breath.

The last words I would ever say.

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**Song Title:**

**Does This Always Happen? by Mogwaii**


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